HolyCrayons
@holycrayons.bsky.social
Geordie. Pyjamas. Some kids. You know the script.
Not nearly enough interest in my dumplings.
Do better.
Do better.
December 7, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Not nearly enough interest in my dumplings.
Do better.
Do better.
Would anyone like to see my dumplings?
December 7, 2025 at 7:15 PM
Would anyone like to see my dumplings?
Feast your eyes on Crotch Goblin 1.0's masterpiece.
We think Santa's reindeer (alpaca?) are pulling a Yule beehive. Obviously.
We think Santa's reindeer (alpaca?) are pulling a Yule beehive. Obviously.
December 7, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Feast your eyes on Crotch Goblin 1.0's masterpiece.
We think Santa's reindeer (alpaca?) are pulling a Yule beehive. Obviously.
We think Santa's reindeer (alpaca?) are pulling a Yule beehive. Obviously.
Having frozen mini sausage rolls and a tear n share garlic bread for my tea because I am absolutely SMASHING adulthood.
December 6, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Having frozen mini sausage rolls and a tear n share garlic bread for my tea because I am absolutely SMASHING adulthood.
Reposted by HolyCrayons
Sex blog
Sex blog
Russ's sex blog
Gloopy custard front bum
Mingey mingey minge
Sex blog
Russ's sex blog
Gloopy custard front bum
Mingey mingey minge
December 5, 2025 at 9:21 PM
Sex blog
Sex blog
Russ's sex blog
Gloopy custard front bum
Mingey mingey minge
Sex blog
Russ's sex blog
Gloopy custard front bum
Mingey mingey minge
The urge to say "where's he coming from? Wales?" when you ring the takeaway up asking where the fuck your tea is and they hit you with "the driver's on his way".
December 5, 2025 at 8:40 PM
The urge to say "where's he coming from? Wales?" when you ring the takeaway up asking where the fuck your tea is and they hit you with "the driver's on his way".
Reposted by HolyCrayons
I will never stop being grateful to Bob Mortimer for the funniest thing I think I ever saw on TV.
youtu.be/__MUf2Qv6_U?...
youtu.be/__MUf2Qv6_U?...
Smell of Reeves and Mortimer - Stars in Their Eyes
YouTube video by scott42
youtu.be
December 5, 2025 at 12:36 PM
I will never stop being grateful to Bob Mortimer for the funniest thing I think I ever saw on TV.
youtu.be/__MUf2Qv6_U?...
youtu.be/__MUf2Qv6_U?...
AHH super duper. Sore throat. And so it begins.
December 5, 2025 at 11:26 AM
AHH super duper. Sore throat. And so it begins.
Without downloading any new pics, describe your vibe for today using an image from your gallery.
December 4, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Without downloading any new pics, describe your vibe for today using an image from your gallery.
Not going to lie folks, this is the best thing that's happened to me all year.
December 3, 2025 at 12:05 PM
Not going to lie folks, this is the best thing that's happened to me all year.
Reposted by HolyCrayons
Remember that pointless 22 mile round trip to the retail park yesterday? I'm trying again today.
December 3, 2025 at 8:28 AM
Remember that pointless 22 mile round trip to the retail park yesterday? I'm trying again today.
Ugh. I feel very strongly that ch4 should stop showing the Italy episodes of 'Everybody Loves Raymond'.
December 3, 2025 at 9:04 AM
Ugh. I feel very strongly that ch4 should stop showing the Italy episodes of 'Everybody Loves Raymond'.
Remember that pointless 22 mile round trip to the retail park yesterday? I'm trying again today.
December 3, 2025 at 8:28 AM
Remember that pointless 22 mile round trip to the retail park yesterday? I'm trying again today.
Reposted by HolyCrayons
what if we kissed at the horny grasshopper cafe....
February 10, 2024 at 8:07 AM
what if we kissed at the horny grasshopper cafe....
Lots of "influencers" sharing their top picks for Christmas Day outfits. All sequins, sparkles and guff.
Wear your fucking pyjamas, dicks!
Wear your fucking pyjamas, dicks!
December 2, 2025 at 9:06 PM
Lots of "influencers" sharing their top picks for Christmas Day outfits. All sequins, sparkles and guff.
Wear your fucking pyjamas, dicks!
Wear your fucking pyjamas, dicks!
There's a lot of Yorkshire pudding discourse over on the other place.
a man wearing a necklace is sitting at a table eating a snack .
ALT: a man wearing a necklace is sitting at a table eating a snack .
media.tenor.com
December 2, 2025 at 8:46 PM
There's a lot of Yorkshire pudding discourse over on the other place.
Feeling organised and accomplished, I just drove 11 miles to the retail park to tackle M&S and forgot to take my purse/any form currency.
December 2, 2025 at 10:29 AM
Feeling organised and accomplished, I just drove 11 miles to the retail park to tackle M&S and forgot to take my purse/any form currency.
Disney - "A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"
Yeah? Well I dreamt about walking into my old high school changing room and seeing Ms Bainbridge's parsnip pubes and pointy, ape tits then running away crying and getting lost.
Yeah? Well I dreamt about walking into my old high school changing room and seeing Ms Bainbridge's parsnip pubes and pointy, ape tits then running away crying and getting lost.
a woman in a red dress is sitting on a couch with a picture of a man on the wall behind her .
ALT: a woman in a red dress is sitting on a couch with a picture of a man on the wall behind her .
media.tenor.com
December 2, 2025 at 8:23 AM
Disney - "A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"
Yeah? Well I dreamt about walking into my old high school changing room and seeing Ms Bainbridge's parsnip pubes and pointy, ape tits then running away crying and getting lost.
Yeah? Well I dreamt about walking into my old high school changing room and seeing Ms Bainbridge's parsnip pubes and pointy, ape tits then running away crying and getting lost.
Not me eyeing up the Christmas After Eights in the garage fridge.
December 1, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Not me eyeing up the Christmas After Eights in the garage fridge.
I want to see that 'Pillion' movie starring the wonderful Alexander Skarsgård, unfortunately the chances of my getting pregnant immediately thereafter would be sky high.
a close up of a man 's face with the words oh it 's hot
ALT: a close up of a man 's face with the words oh it 's hot
media.tenor.com
November 29, 2025 at 11:44 AM
I want to see that 'Pillion' movie starring the wonderful Alexander Skarsgård, unfortunately the chances of my getting pregnant immediately thereafter would be sky high.
Everything I have learnt about 'Wicked', Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande has been entirely against my will.
November 27, 2025 at 9:06 AM
Everything I have learnt about 'Wicked', Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande has been entirely against my will.
Some knuckle dragger from school has recently been hospitalised for a third time in two months. She's an asthmatic, COPD suffering, chain smoker. She's just shared an update on Facebook saying she's absolutely shaken and devastated. She could be dead in ten years if she doesn't stop smoking...
November 25, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Some knuckle dragger from school has recently been hospitalised for a third time in two months. She's an asthmatic, COPD suffering, chain smoker. She's just shared an update on Facebook saying she's absolutely shaken and devastated. She could be dead in ten years if she doesn't stop smoking...
There's a breakout of Scarlet fever at the kid's nursery/school.
November 22, 2025 at 6:30 PM
There's a breakout of Scarlet fever at the kid's nursery/school.
Me, as your in-house Bluesky therapist.
November 22, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Me, as your in-house Bluesky therapist.
Reposted by HolyCrayons
Y'know what, I think I'll pass.
November 22, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Y'know what, I think I'll pass.