bribed the fema camp guards with possum steaks so they'd let me have 15 minutes alone in the jack shack

are you cooking your turkey missionary or face down ass up style this year

Talked about politics at 9 am before I even ate my salt bagel

Bring these back permanently you cowards

Casting the dragon shout I learned from the wall of a Taco Bell bathroom

Kendrick subjecting Mustard to a lifetime of this is 🤌🤌

you can't even imagine the insane levels of yearning im experiencing rn

my homage to @roseschmits.bsky.social! calling these Cephalopots. her work has been inspiring me since i started throwing in April :0)

jarvis, fix my relationship with my father

my punk rock hairdresser was telling me about how since the election he's gone back to lifting weights and jogging, and was like "do you want a hard seltzer at 10:30 am" and now he's playing This Year by the Mountain Goats. a lot going on here today

there is too much activity here right now. heading to LinkedIn til it all calms down a bit.

government supercomputers have been hard at work identifying exactly who to blame for the election: a guy in kansas city named “jeff borpis” whose primary animating concern is making golf balls last longer