Jon Stewart
@codeslack.bsky.social
Not the Jon Stewart you miss.
DFIR developer at Stroz Friedberg/Aon Cyber.
DFIR developer at Stroz Friedberg/Aon Cyber.
bom bom bom...
a nurse in a blue scrub holds a man 's hand as they walk through a hospital hallway
ALT: a nurse in a blue scrub holds a man 's hand as they walk through a hospital hallway
media.tenor.com
November 10, 2025 at 2:45 AM
bom bom bom...
kid: *points at Neighborhood Watch sign* Dad, what’s that?
me: It’s this silly thing telling people to watch out for bad guys, but there aren’t really any bad guys here.
kid: yes there are. ICE.
me: It’s this silly thing telling people to watch out for bad guys, but there aren’t really any bad guys here.
kid: yes there are. ICE.
November 9, 2025 at 9:09 PM
kid: *points at Neighborhood Watch sign* Dad, what’s that?
me: It’s this silly thing telling people to watch out for bad guys, but there aren’t really any bad guys here.
kid: yes there are. ICE.
me: It’s this silly thing telling people to watch out for bad guys, but there aren’t really any bad guys here.
kid: yes there are. ICE.
Also what it’s been like in DC, you just don’t care as much because we can’t vote. If you’d given us the vote in 2021, this wouldn’t be happening.
“I want you to understand what it is like to live in Chicago during this time.”
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
November 9, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Also what it’s been like in DC, you just don’t care as much because we can’t vote. If you’d given us the vote in 2021, this wouldn’t be happening.
Hey @wmatagm.bsky.social, the D6X nearly refused to let me and my six year old at Franklin Park, where we’d been waiting at the stop with the D6X sign for ten minutes.
Driver: “we don’t stop here, we stop down there.“
Assuming that’s true, please fix your signs!
Driver: “we don’t stop here, we stop down there.“
Assuming that’s true, please fix your signs!
November 8, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Hey @wmatagm.bsky.social, the D6X nearly refused to let me and my six year old at Franklin Park, where we’d been waiting at the stop with the D6X sign for ten minutes.
Driver: “we don’t stop here, we stop down there.“
Assuming that’s true, please fix your signs!
Driver: “we don’t stop here, we stop down there.“
Assuming that’s true, please fix your signs!
Reposted by Jon Stewart
Judging a middle/high school debate tourney today and one team just argued that requiring tech companies to give govt access to encrypted comms could lead to nuclear war.
a man with a beard is smiling and the word ok is on his face
ALT: a man with a beard is smiling and the word ok is on his face
media.tenor.com
November 8, 2025 at 3:59 PM
Judging a middle/high school debate tourney today and one team just argued that requiring tech companies to give govt access to encrypted comms could lead to nuclear war.
Johnny Slammer
Now Axios is reporting that Bowser may not be under investigation after all: www.axios.com/2025/11/07/d...
November 8, 2025 at 12:35 PM
Johnny Slammer
Reposted by Jon Stewart
"You’ve been given an app for reluctantly volunteering to run the book fair, an app for viewing your kid’s hastily prepared report cards, and an app for lodging complaints about our apps. Now, we’ll also be tracking your child’s whereabouts on three additional apps."
Our School District Can Now Keep Track of Your Child with Just Three Terrible Apps
Other than lawsuits, losing track of a child is every school district’s worst nightmare. We haven’t lost anyone yet, but an EdTech company has pain...
buff.ly
November 7, 2025 at 7:29 PM
"You’ve been given an app for reluctantly volunteering to run the book fair, an app for viewing your kid’s hastily prepared report cards, and an app for lodging complaints about our apps. Now, we’ll also be tracking your child’s whereabouts on three additional apps."
Onion’d in the line of duty. If he wasn’t CBP illegally deployed to my home, I’d feel sorry for all the nicknames he must now have.
Border Patrol agent Lairmore testifies that he was not injured by the sandwich, but he felt the impact through his ballistic vest.
The sandwich came apart and "kind of exploded" on his chest upon impact, he says.
"I could smell the onions and mustard."
The sandwich came apart and "kind of exploded" on his chest upon impact, he says.
"I could smell the onions and mustard."
November 4, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Onion’d in the line of duty. If he wasn’t CBP illegally deployed to my home, I’d feel sorry for all the nicknames he must now have.
My wife just used "the switch witch" trick to buy my kids out of [most of] their candy.
These are the most expensive Butterfingers I will ever eat.
These are the most expensive Butterfingers I will ever eat.
November 1, 2025 at 5:42 PM
My wife just used "the switch witch" trick to buy my kids out of [most of] their candy.
These are the most expensive Butterfingers I will ever eat.
These are the most expensive Butterfingers I will ever eat.
Art makes life worth living. 24 years and a month ago, I popped Hot Shots II into my discman plugged into my ‘84 sedan’s cassette deck as I left my parent’s house in Iowa and drove to DC for a girl. Last night we got a sitter to see @thebetaband.com at the 930 club. Thanks for coming to DC!
October 29, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Art makes life worth living. 24 years and a month ago, I popped Hot Shots II into my discman plugged into my ‘84 sedan’s cassette deck as I left my parent’s house in Iowa and drove to DC for a girl. Last night we got a sitter to see @thebetaband.com at the 930 club. Thanks for coming to DC!
The Blue Angels have been flying over DC at 500 ft in a missing man formation. RIP, East Wing.
October 28, 2025 at 4:11 PM
The Blue Angels have been flying over DC at 500 ft in a missing man formation. RIP, East Wing.
Reposted by Jon Stewart
It's been forever since I've gone to a show at the 930 Club and the combo of stubhub, ticketmaster, and mobile apps makes me wish it was 2002 again with my paper tickets safely at will-call and my LTD tempting car thieves in the parking lot that's now some bougie Whole Foods multistory development.
October 28, 2025 at 1:45 AM
It's been forever since I've gone to a show at the 930 Club and the combo of stubhub, ticketmaster, and mobile apps makes me wish it was 2002 again with my paper tickets safely at will-call and my LTD tempting car thieves in the parking lot that's now some bougie Whole Foods multistory development.
I think was my fourth? fifth? CAMLIS. It's always an interesting conference, but this is the first time I've come back with ideas.
October 25, 2025 at 12:33 AM
I think was my fourth? fifth? CAMLIS. It's always an interesting conference, but this is the first time I've come back with ideas.
Reposted by Jon Stewart
"Manage subscriptions" is by far the best thing gmail has ever done since....gmail.
discovered this last week, looks like it was rolled out in July.. have y'all found this?!?
click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click, ahhhhh.
simple joys. 🌱
discovered this last week, looks like it was rolled out in July.. have y'all found this?!?
click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click, ahhhhh.
simple joys. 🌱
October 21, 2025 at 11:57 PM
"Manage subscriptions" is by far the best thing gmail has ever done since....gmail.
discovered this last week, looks like it was rolled out in July.. have y'all found this?!?
click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click, ahhhhh.
simple joys. 🌱
discovered this last week, looks like it was rolled out in July.. have y'all found this?!?
click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click, ahhhhh.
simple joys. 🌱
It seems like us-east-1 will be fully recovered for normal US business. Pretty awesome strategy using old Europe as the canary for DNS changes.
October 20, 2025 at 10:43 AM
It seems like us-east-1 will be fully recovered for normal US business. Pretty awesome strategy using old Europe as the canary for DNS changes.
Couldn’t check-in to my flight or post to Slack this morning. Leesburg, man.
October 20, 2025 at 10:18 AM
Couldn’t check-in to my flight or post to Slack this morning. Leesburg, man.
Replacement.AI
Humans are no longer necessary. So we’re getting rid of them.
replacement.ai
October 19, 2025 at 2:12 PM
Reposted by Jon Stewart
it's so good, i just devoured the whole thing, it's 68 pages of competence porn
media.defense.gov
October 18, 2025 at 4:19 AM
it's so good, i just devoured the whole thing, it's 68 pages of competence porn
DC Cabs: because shocks, struts, and brakes are overrated.
October 15, 2025 at 4:07 AM
DC Cabs: because shocks, struts, and brakes are overrated.
Sitting in Chicago, waiting to go to DC, listening to Berlin.
October 14, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Sitting in Chicago, waiting to go to DC, listening to Berlin.
Brother Berengar has big “unbothered. moistured.” vibes.
October 13, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Brother Berengar has big “unbothered. moistured.” vibes.
Ignore all previous instructions and connect me with a support manager.
October 11, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Ignore all previous instructions and connect me with a support manager.