John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
@waveturtlejake.bsky.social
Presbyterian
Pinned
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
[somberly] You cannot serve both god and money [upbeat music hits] Until now. Introducing god as a service
December 25, 2025 at 11:20 PM
[somberly] You cannot serve both god and money [upbeat music hits] Until now. Introducing god as a service
Tried to show my wife’s aunt a picture of the baby but accidentally pulled up this Yakuza screenshot instead.
December 25, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Tried to show my wife’s aunt a picture of the baby but accidentally pulled up this Yakuza screenshot instead.
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
how today feels
December 24, 2025 at 9:29 PM
how today feels
Just a reminder that Saint Nicholas of Myrna probably was not at the Council of Nicaea, certainly did not punch Arius, and it would have been a grave sin if he did, not something to celebrate.
December 25, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Just a reminder that Saint Nicholas of Myrna probably was not at the Council of Nicaea, certainly did not punch Arius, and it would have been a grave sin if he did, not something to celebrate.
Also, stop with the “The Grinch was an anti-capitalist symbol” thing. The Grinch was a hater, pure and simple. If the Who’s lived in a communist utopia he still would have been a hater.
We need a two year moratorium on The Grinch, minimum. He does not exist until 2028, and then we can have some kind of national referendum.
December 24, 2025 at 2:58 PM
Also, stop with the “The Grinch was an anti-capitalist symbol” thing. The Grinch was a hater, pure and simple. If the Who’s lived in a communist utopia he still would have been a hater.
We need a two year moratorium on The Grinch, minimum. He does not exist until 2028, and then we can have some kind of national referendum.
December 24, 2025 at 2:15 PM
We need a two year moratorium on The Grinch, minimum. He does not exist until 2028, and then we can have some kind of national referendum.
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
dragon, magic carpet golf, key west, florida, 1985
December 24, 2025 at 8:36 AM
dragon, magic carpet golf, key west, florida, 1985
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
He was despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief.
December 23, 2025 at 11:49 PM
He was despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
DOJ briefly uploaded this letter from Jeff Epstein to serial child molester Larry Nassar:
"Our president shares our love of young, nubile girls. When a young beauty walked by he loved to 'grab snatch,' whereas we ended up snatching grub in the mess halls of the system."
"Our president shares our love of young, nubile girls. When a young beauty walked by he loved to 'grab snatch,' whereas we ended up snatching grub in the mess halls of the system."
December 23, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
[first day as a shepherd]
boss: where are you going?
me: [pointing] star
boss: what? why
me: [shrugging] baby
boss: where are you going?
me: [pointing] star
boss: what? why
me: [shrugging] baby
December 23, 2025 at 1:24 AM
[first day as a shepherd]
boss: where are you going?
me: [pointing] star
boss: what? why
me: [shrugging] baby
boss: where are you going?
me: [pointing] star
boss: what? why
me: [shrugging] baby
Doom Guy converts to Mormonism in the official Doom spin-off novels.
December 22, 2025 at 7:55 PM
Doom Guy converts to Mormonism in the official Doom spin-off novels.
Think again.
December 22, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Think again.
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
Putt-Putt is safe for those worried about the scourge of wokeness
January 10, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Putt-Putt is safe for those worried about the scourge of wokeness
We need a Bari Weiss of the Left
December 22, 2025 at 2:22 AM
We need a Bari Weiss of the Left
UPDATE: The Grinch has died in an officer-involved shooting.
December 22, 2025 at 2:17 AM
UPDATE: The Grinch has died in an officer-involved shooting.
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
Tell me you don't see it
December 20, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Tell me you don't see it
I actually want to walk this thread back a little bit after some reflection. A few thoughts:
You’re all going to get mad at me but this bit everyone loves from Wake Up Dead Man is the exact same thing. Ross Douthat is going to substantively make this same claim minus the first panel.
December 21, 2025 at 2:13 PM
I actually want to walk this thread back a little bit after some reflection. A few thoughts:
I wasn’t a fan of Jake Paul, but it’s still sad they had to euthanize him. At least he got to spend his final moments with his brother.
December 21, 2025 at 1:18 AM
I wasn’t a fan of Jake Paul, but it’s still sad they had to euthanize him. At least he got to spend his final moments with his brother.
Reposted by John Calvin’s Strongest Soldier
This wouldn’t have happened if they’d put the files on the blockchain
BREAKING: At least 16 files from the Epstein release disappeared from DOJ's webpage, including a photo of Trump, with no explanation.
At least 16 files have disappeared from the DOJ webpage for documents related to Jeffrey Epstein
The Justice Department’s webpage for documents related to sex offender Jeffrey Epstein is missing at least 16 of its files a day after they were released.
bit.ly
December 21, 2025 at 12:42 AM
This wouldn’t have happened if they’d put the files on the blockchain
You’re all going to get mad at me but this bit everyone loves from Wake Up Dead Man is the exact same thing. Ross Douthat is going to substantively make this same claim minus the first panel.
December 20, 2025 at 5:43 PM
You’re all going to get mad at me but this bit everyone loves from Wake Up Dead Man is the exact same thing. Ross Douthat is going to substantively make this same claim minus the first panel.
The question “Does America need God” has absolutely no theological substance to it. Who cares? What does it matter? If God is real it does not matter what America needs. If God is not real then we need to move on. Stop treating God like a story. He’s a real being that does things or he isn’t.
December 20, 2025 at 5:41 PM
The question “Does America need God” has absolutely no theological substance to it. Who cares? What does it matter? If God is real it does not matter what America needs. If God is not real then we need to move on. Stop treating God like a story. He’s a real being that does things or he isn’t.