Dave Carlson
@thecubic.net
hello everyone, especially you
he+they, Chaotic Good, Autistic, Type 1 Diabetic, #insulin4all
thecubic.22 on Signal / 530997A7 on PGP
Security & distributed systems enthusiast; funemployed & pretired
I'm an ALLY, so pick me up from the airport plz
he+they, Chaotic Good, Autistic, Type 1 Diabetic, #insulin4all
thecubic.22 on Signal / 530997A7 on PGP
Security & distributed systems enthusiast; funemployed & pretired
I'm an ALLY, so pick me up from the airport plz
MARCH 21, 1993... Somewhere over the Atlantic. I've spent
the last nineteen years learning how to be Doogie Howser,
M.D. Now it's time to learn how to be just Doogie.
the last nineteen years learning how to be Doogie Howser,
M.D. Now it's time to learn how to be just Doogie.
February 15, 2026 at 10:09 PM
MARCH 21, 1993... Somewhere over the Atlantic. I've spent
the last nineteen years learning how to be Doogie Howser,
M.D. Now it's time to learn how to be just Doogie.
the last nineteen years learning how to be Doogie Howser,
M.D. Now it's time to learn how to be just Doogie.
fuck this shit, honestly
Minnesota has a program called Senior Citizen Education Program which allows 62+ to take standard courses for $20 per credit or free to audit
Otherwise residents are $620.50 per (31x), and nonresidents are $1500.70 per (75x)
Reinvent yourself at the library, grandpa
Minnesota has a program called Senior Citizen Education Program which allows 62+ to take standard courses for $20 per credit or free to audit
Otherwise residents are $620.50 per (31x), and nonresidents are $1500.70 per (75x)
Reinvent yourself at the library, grandpa
Schools across the country are offering courses and retreats for people 50+ who want to reinvent themselves and embrace lifelong learning and discovery.
Need a new path in midlife? There's a school for that and a quiz to kickstart it
Schools across the country are offering courses and retreats for people 50+ who want to reinvent themselves and embrace lifelong learning and discovery.
n.pr
February 15, 2026 at 8:01 PM
fuck this shit, honestly
Minnesota has a program called Senior Citizen Education Program which allows 62+ to take standard courses for $20 per credit or free to audit
Otherwise residents are $620.50 per (31x), and nonresidents are $1500.70 per (75x)
Reinvent yourself at the library, grandpa
Minnesota has a program called Senior Citizen Education Program which allows 62+ to take standard courses for $20 per credit or free to audit
Otherwise residents are $620.50 per (31x), and nonresidents are $1500.70 per (75x)
Reinvent yourself at the library, grandpa
Elon is a bitchass on so many levels. This one he's a bitchass both for defaming the Irish and a bitchass for being vaguely teutonic and completely ignoring the very real cultural influence of (e.g.) Deutsch emigrants
He went to UPenn. "Pennsylvania D[e]ut[s]ch"
He went to UPenn. "Pennsylvania D[e]ut[s]ch"
1/3 What Musk is really referring to here is, of course “race” - that construct that served to define the hierarchies of wealth & power structured by modern colonialism. Like other far right racists though, he uses the word “culture” as a seemingly less pernicious synonym.
February 15, 2026 at 6:12 PM
Elon is a bitchass on so many levels. This one he's a bitchass both for defaming the Irish and a bitchass for being vaguely teutonic and completely ignoring the very real cultural influence of (e.g.) Deutsch emigrants
He went to UPenn. "Pennsylvania D[e]ut[s]ch"
He went to UPenn. "Pennsylvania D[e]ut[s]ch"
it's not called the Sarbanes-Vibesly Act
lol this is gonna burst so fucking hard
February 15, 2026 at 6:59 AM
it's not called the Sarbanes-Vibesly Act
let me make it worse
just because the fucking device does not present you with the output of the facial rec does not mean that facial rec did not occur on Meta's GPU fleet hundreds or thousands of miles away
also "Mark wants to push on [the FTC consent decree]", a real "mods asleep" sentence
just because the fucking device does not present you with the output of the facial rec does not mean that facial rec did not occur on Meta's GPU fleet hundreds or thousands of miles away
also "Mark wants to push on [the FTC consent decree]", a real "mods asleep" sentence
Facebook plans to put facial recognition in its glasses and they think we’re too stupid to fight back.
Their internal memo: “We will launch during a dynamic political environment where many civil society groups that we would expect to attack us would have their resources focused on other concerns.”
Their internal memo: “We will launch during a dynamic political environment where many civil society groups that we would expect to attack us would have their resources focused on other concerns.”
Meta Plans to Add Facial Recognition Technology to Its Smart Glasses
www.nytimes.com
February 13, 2026 at 5:37 PM
let me make it worse
just because the fucking device does not present you with the output of the facial rec does not mean that facial rec did not occur on Meta's GPU fleet hundreds or thousands of miles away
also "Mark wants to push on [the FTC consent decree]", a real "mods asleep" sentence
just because the fucking device does not present you with the output of the facial rec does not mean that facial rec did not occur on Meta's GPU fleet hundreds or thousands of miles away
also "Mark wants to push on [the FTC consent decree]", a real "mods asleep" sentence
smokin' some of that impeccable Fancy Ray shit I got at the Public Library and hitting the street handing out whistles I stole from a nerd because I'm the People's Champion today
February 13, 2026 at 5:28 PM
smokin' some of that impeccable Fancy Ray shit I got at the Public Library and hitting the street handing out whistles I stole from a nerd because I'm the People's Champion today
I used to work right near this intersection and I think about this every single time I cross it
An additional remarkable thing about this is there was a voice recognition pilot program where any uttered words of interest into a police video camera was reviewed which is how they caught Auderer
An additional remarkable thing about this is there was a voice recognition pilot program where any uttered words of interest into a police video camera was reviewed which is how they caught Auderer
"'She is dead,'" Officer Auderer told Officer Solan, before bursting out laughing.
"'No, it’s a regular person,' Officer Auderer said, adding: 'Yeah, just write a check — $11,000. She was 26, anyway. She had limited value.'"
"'No, it’s a regular person,' Officer Auderer said, adding: 'Yeah, just write a check — $11,000. She was 26, anyway. She had limited value.'"
Seattle to Pay $29 Million to Family of Woman Fatally Struck by Police S.U.V.
www.nytimes.com
February 13, 2026 at 4:30 PM
I used to work right near this intersection and I think about this every single time I cross it
An additional remarkable thing about this is there was a voice recognition pilot program where any uttered words of interest into a police video camera was reviewed which is how they caught Auderer
An additional remarkable thing about this is there was a voice recognition pilot program where any uttered words of interest into a police video camera was reviewed which is how they caught Auderer
feels like we need a word to describe people that on a simple query, decided to go one step up in agency from what was asked, and then lobby for the opposite decision the person talking to them communicated
I don't think you can get away with this in real life, like I'd straight-up yell at you
I don't think you can get away with this in real life, like I'd straight-up yell at you
February 12, 2026 at 10:43 PM
feels like we need a word to describe people that on a simple query, decided to go one step up in agency from what was asked, and then lobby for the opposite decision the person talking to them communicated
I don't think you can get away with this in real life, like I'd straight-up yell at you
I don't think you can get away with this in real life, like I'd straight-up yell at you
lipasyncing: it's the Future
it's not lipsyncing, it's lip*A*syncing
February 10, 2026 at 9:25 PM
lipasyncing: it's the Future
huh, there was a real everybody loves dogs commercial during the Super Bowl which really clashes with the fact that people on my street kicked their enmeshed pandemic dogs outside so as not to ... make the party better? ... but anyway those dogs all started whining and barking so bad they howled
February 10, 2026 at 9:15 PM
huh, there was a real everybody loves dogs commercial during the Super Bowl which really clashes with the fact that people on my street kicked their enmeshed pandemic dogs outside so as not to ... make the party better? ... but anyway those dogs all started whining and barking so bad they howled
119th Congress: well, not *SINE* die per se, not totally cum die either, just, like, fortasse dies - *maybe* one day. We're adjourning fortasse dies. *closes phone with Google Translate* that ancient right
one thing that has always confused me about these hypos where the House refuses to recognize Dem winners—the House isn't a continuing body, and it wouldn't be the current House that would be seating anyone. it's the incoming House. www.vox.com/politics/478...
February 10, 2026 at 3:03 AM
119th Congress: well, not *SINE* die per se, not totally cum die either, just, like, fortasse dies - *maybe* one day. We're adjourning fortasse dies. *closes phone with Google Translate* that ancient right
I forget sometimes that it's normal to harangue your legislators (one's a sponsor)
The next time I get asked if I want to be called by any names in the bedroom I'm going to answer back "a user of significant technical skill" immediately (the bill: just thwart those, NBD)
The next time I get asked if I want to be called by any names in the bedroom I'm going to answer back "a user of significant technical skill" immediately (the bill: just thwart those, NBD)
February 9, 2026 at 11:04 PM
I forget sometimes that it's normal to harangue your legislators (one's a sponsor)
The next time I get asked if I want to be called by any names in the bedroom I'm going to answer back "a user of significant technical skill" immediately (the bill: just thwart those, NBD)
The next time I get asked if I want to be called by any names in the bedroom I'm going to answer back "a user of significant technical skill" immediately (the bill: just thwart those, NBD)
"Waldo" is in the Epstein files. You won't find "Waldo", you have to search for "Wally", but that's him, that's what he goes by
He was on three separate flights with Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor
He was on three separate flights with Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor
If you're trying to find Waldo you're a cop
February 8, 2026 at 5:14 AM
"Waldo" is in the Epstein files. You won't find "Waldo", you have to search for "Wally", but that's him, that's what he goes by
He was on three separate flights with Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor
He was on three separate flights with Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor
Reposted by Dave Carlson
if you buy this someone should take the rest of your money and give it away
February 8, 2026 at 1:32 AM
if you buy this someone should take the rest of your money and give it away
me today
"LLMs are absolutely horseshit at describing caselaw"
"LLMs are quite tuned for people that can't read and should never write"
also me
*takes delivery of an LLM8850 AI accelerator*
"LLMs are absolutely horseshit at describing caselaw"
"LLMs are quite tuned for people that can't read and should never write"
also me
*takes delivery of an LLM8850 AI accelerator*
February 8, 2026 at 12:21 AM
me today
"LLMs are absolutely horseshit at describing caselaw"
"LLMs are quite tuned for people that can't read and should never write"
also me
*takes delivery of an LLM8850 AI accelerator*
"LLMs are absolutely horseshit at describing caselaw"
"LLMs are quite tuned for people that can't read and should never write"
also me
*takes delivery of an LLM8850 AI accelerator*
the details on this are way worse than I expected
and the untruths to the magistrate? causing the magistrate to go apeshit????
and the untruths to the magistrate? causing the magistrate to go apeshit????
State of Iowa Hires Hackers to ‘Burglarize’ Courthouse (then the sheriff arrives)
YouTube video by The Civil Rights Lawyer
www.youtube.com
February 7, 2026 at 10:02 PM
the details on this are way worse than I expected
and the untruths to the magistrate? causing the magistrate to go apeshit????
and the untruths to the magistrate? causing the magistrate to go apeshit????
this isn't what physics is. you will surely be disappointed
Physics of a direct hit from an RPG type projectile
February 7, 2026 at 10:55 AM
this isn't what physics is. you will surely be disappointed
opp: sans ring doesn't mean single
me: it's what's called a heuristic. we have this societal contract where you might get approached if you don't wear a ring or wear a black ring
you literally cannot guarantee someone you're dating isn't married
me: it's what's called a heuristic. we have this societal contract where you might get approached if you don't wear a ring or wear a black ring
you literally cannot guarantee someone you're dating isn't married
February 7, 2026 at 10:24 AM
opp: sans ring doesn't mean single
me: it's what's called a heuristic. we have this societal contract where you might get approached if you don't wear a ring or wear a black ring
you literally cannot guarantee someone you're dating isn't married
me: it's what's called a heuristic. we have this societal contract where you might get approached if you don't wear a ring or wear a black ring
you literally cannot guarantee someone you're dating isn't married
Child prodigies get GEDs. Teen moms that were doing just fine get GEDs. One of my managers got a GED
a GED is an unalloyed good. Not only should it not be denigrated, it should be free to take the test and the test taker should be given cash if they pass because that cash comes back to the state
a GED is an unalloyed good. Not only should it not be denigrated, it should be free to take the test and the test taker should be given cash if they pass because that cash comes back to the state
February 7, 2026 at 9:18 AM
Child prodigies get GEDs. Teen moms that were doing just fine get GEDs. One of my managers got a GED
a GED is an unalloyed good. Not only should it not be denigrated, it should be free to take the test and the test taker should be given cash if they pass because that cash comes back to the state
a GED is an unalloyed good. Not only should it not be denigrated, it should be free to take the test and the test taker should be given cash if they pass because that cash comes back to the state
I'm trying to delete my TikTok account
I've tried to delete it twice now and "sorry a system error"
I set up a data download to pass the time and it requires SMS verification and the SMS verifier is broken. "too many attempts" - zero attempts
this is another kind of weaponized incompetence
I've tried to delete it twice now and "sorry a system error"
I set up a data download to pass the time and it requires SMS verification and the SMS verifier is broken. "too many attempts" - zero attempts
this is another kind of weaponized incompetence
February 6, 2026 at 10:02 PM
I'm trying to delete my TikTok account
I've tried to delete it twice now and "sorry a system error"
I set up a data download to pass the time and it requires SMS verification and the SMS verifier is broken. "too many attempts" - zero attempts
this is another kind of weaponized incompetence
I've tried to delete it twice now and "sorry a system error"
I set up a data download to pass the time and it requires SMS verification and the SMS verifier is broken. "too many attempts" - zero attempts
this is another kind of weaponized incompetence
lmao "sophisticated databases"
*gasp* antifa has postgres
meanwhile, what does fa have, oh flock safety, palantir, and like, idk whatever they have in that datacenter complex that's so big that it's also half of the power utility it's connected to so it can grid-isolate and be up forever? that?
*gasp* antifa has postgres
meanwhile, what does fa have, oh flock safety, palantir, and like, idk whatever they have in that datacenter complex that's so big that it's also half of the power utility it's connected to so it can grid-isolate and be up forever? that?
February 6, 2026 at 3:33 AM
lmao "sophisticated databases"
*gasp* antifa has postgres
meanwhile, what does fa have, oh flock safety, palantir, and like, idk whatever they have in that datacenter complex that's so big that it's also half of the power utility it's connected to so it can grid-isolate and be up forever? that?
*gasp* antifa has postgres
meanwhile, what does fa have, oh flock safety, palantir, and like, idk whatever they have in that datacenter complex that's so big that it's also half of the power utility it's connected to so it can grid-isolate and be up forever? that?
I ... would not fuck with an ice sculpture in St. Paul and expect to get away with it. there are drunk people and beautiful hand-crafted ice sculptures
for example, at the Winter Carnival, 10 blocks away
how could there possibly not be a conviction precedent
for example, at the Winter Carnival, 10 blocks away
how could there possibly not be a conviction precedent
February 6, 2026 at 12:43 AM
I ... would not fuck with an ice sculpture in St. Paul and expect to get away with it. there are drunk people and beautiful hand-crafted ice sculptures
for example, at the Winter Carnival, 10 blocks away
how could there possibly not be a conviction precedent
for example, at the Winter Carnival, 10 blocks away
how could there possibly not be a conviction precedent