oneoneoneone
@oneoneoneone.bsky.social
Wizard cop. B-list situationist. Used to be cool. I am interested in British politics and detective stories and woodlice and goofy movies about misunderstandings.
we've invented the "better things aren't possible" line from the "don't say 'better things aren't possible' meme"
Starmer's reported condition - incredibly unpopular, shorn of authority, probably un-reelectable and yet will stagger on for want of an alternative - is just the new normal of how Britain is governed. It was also true for two-thirds of May's premiership, half of Johnson's and all of Sunak's.
February 6, 2026 at 12:36 PM
we've invented the "better things aren't possible" line from the "don't say 'better things aren't possible' meme"
Once again I am sporadically banging on about the fact that all these weirdos are pretending to be Roman Catholics but either don't understand the concept of Pastor Aeternus or are wilfully deciding that it doesn't apply to them.
I don’t think you should be allowed to both-sides this issue by contrasting the Pope quoting ‘I was a stranger and you let me in’ and Vance committing a heresy and Johnson doing post hoc backfilling biblical exegesis about obeying the law (okay, so just make migration legal, problem solved)
February 6, 2026 at 11:43 AM
Once again I am sporadically banging on about the fact that all these weirdos are pretending to be Roman Catholics but either don't understand the concept of Pastor Aeternus or are wilfully deciding that it doesn't apply to them.
this is broadly my view tbh. will they win the next election? literally a coin toss at this stage. are they the best placed to actually do some social democratic stuff over the next 3 years rather than flapping around? yes!
Labour just needs to close its eyes, elect Angela Rayner or Ed Miliband as leader now, and hope for the best. No one is going to emerge from this broken government as a better alternative than them so you're only wasting valuable time until the inevitable happens
feels like Labour is stuck in the seventh circle of leadership contest hell, ie pingponging endlessly between 'he should go!' and 'but not be replaced by any of the people available in this actual life'
February 5, 2026 at 11:23 AM
this is broadly my view tbh. will they win the next election? literally a coin toss at this stage. are they the best placed to actually do some social democratic stuff over the next 3 years rather than flapping around? yes!
some of us are old enough to remember when Adam Afriyie was the bright young thing who was supposed to be about to leap in and replace David Cameron for about a week and a half in 2013
www.theguardian.com/politics/201...
www.theguardian.com/politics/201...
February 5, 2026 at 10:13 AM
some of us are old enough to remember when Adam Afriyie was the bright young thing who was supposed to be about to leap in and replace David Cameron for about a week and a half in 2013
www.theguardian.com/politics/201...
www.theguardian.com/politics/201...
This is the US equivalent of disgraced former Tory MP Owen Paterson editing his own Wikipedia page to note that he was ranked 5th on sexymp.co.uk
February 2, 2026 at 1:47 PM
This is the US equivalent of disgraced former Tory MP Owen Paterson editing his own Wikipedia page to note that he was ranked 5th on sexymp.co.uk
Just found this picture of Starmer from a trip to Berlin in 2022 and honestly the vibe is "90's techno legend announcing their comeback tour"
January 30, 2026 at 12:46 PM
Just found this picture of Starmer from a trip to Berlin in 2022 and honestly the vibe is "90's techno legend announcing their comeback tour"
This has reminded me of when some contractors working on the 02 in 2017 found the Blue Peter time capsule and smashed it open thinking they'd found buried treasure only to discover a load of Tellytubbies, a tamagochi and a photo of Princess Di.
www.standard.co.uk/news/london/...
www.standard.co.uk/news/london/...
January 30, 2026 at 10:17 AM
This has reminded me of when some contractors working on the 02 in 2017 found the Blue Peter time capsule and smashed it open thinking they'd found buried treasure only to discover a load of Tellytubbies, a tamagochi and a photo of Princess Di.
www.standard.co.uk/news/london/...
www.standard.co.uk/news/london/...
The Feast by Margaret Kennedy. Not what I was expecting it to be. Is it a fable? A moral tale? A satire? Veers from gently hilarious to incredibly tense and back again with a seam of kindness right through. By the first chapter you know what happens in the end, & the rest is all about HOW and WHO.
Lightning book recommendation round! What was the last really good book you read? What was the vibe of it? Mine was Barbara Pym, An Unsuitable Attachment. Clergymen, spinsters, libraries, repressed sexuality, and a very sharp eye observing it all.
January 30, 2026 at 9:36 AM
The Feast by Margaret Kennedy. Not what I was expecting it to be. Is it a fable? A moral tale? A satire? Veers from gently hilarious to incredibly tense and back again with a seam of kindness right through. By the first chapter you know what happens in the end, & the rest is all about HOW and WHO.
holy smokes I think this "current vibe" is essentially the opposite of everything I do apart from maybe the drugs and eggs and it comes with the added bonus of not being the co-founder of an AI start-up
January 29, 2026 at 9:40 AM
holy smokes I think this "current vibe" is essentially the opposite of everything I do apart from maybe the drugs and eggs and it comes with the added bonus of not being the co-founder of an AI start-up
my favourite shakespeare-isn't-real crank is Sigmund Freud, who went through a load of his books when they were being re-issued and added these absolutely unnecessary and weird footnotes
January 28, 2026 at 1:01 PM
my favourite shakespeare-isn't-real crank is Sigmund Freud, who went through a load of his books when they were being re-issued and added these absolutely unnecessary and weird footnotes
in 1992 Oliver Letwin was the Tory candidate for Hampstead & Highgate, a seat which was narrowly won by Glenda Jackson who campaigned for Labour with the incredible slogan "DON'T LET LETWIN WIN"
If Matt Goodwin loses badly I suppose the headlines write themselves
January 27, 2026 at 3:25 PM
in 1992 Oliver Letwin was the Tory candidate for Hampstead & Highgate, a seat which was narrowly won by Glenda Jackson who campaigned for Labour with the incredible slogan "DON'T LET LETWIN WIN"
True British Politics Watchers will recognise this as a knowing reference to the Times' 2007 Giant Penguin Meets Hazel Blears feature.
January 25, 2026 at 1:04 PM
True British Politics Watchers will recognise this as a knowing reference to the Times' 2007 Giant Penguin Meets Hazel Blears feature.
keep thinking about four out of the five secret service chiefs having a meeting about top secret spy stuff and the fifth one is out there having a morning on a jetski before going off in a helicopter to watch Everton lose to Sunderland
January 23, 2026 at 11:56 AM
keep thinking about four out of the five secret service chiefs having a meeting about top secret spy stuff and the fifth one is out there having a morning on a jetski before going off in a helicopter to watch Everton lose to Sunderland
cursed F/M/K
'Demystifying populism'....... By championing it and being a leading proponent at every turn?
January 23, 2026 at 11:00 AM
cursed F/M/K
*if* Burnham ran then I think this is just about winnable for him (and probably the most winnable Manchester constituency for Labour in general) but it's not going to be a particularly pleasant byelection whoever the NEC allows to stand
January 22, 2026 at 11:20 AM
*if* Burnham ran then I think this is just about winnable for him (and probably the most winnable Manchester constituency for Labour in general) but it's not going to be a particularly pleasant byelection whoever the NEC allows to stand
Can't help but think that it isn't a good sign that the most recent two US presidents were someone who used to call Theresa May "Mrs Thatcher" and someone who doesn't know the name of the country he's attempting to obtain.
Trump is now confusing Greenland and Iceland: "They're not there for us on Iceland, that I can tell you. Our stock market took the first dip yesterday because of Iceland. So Iceland has already cost us a lot of money."
January 21, 2026 at 2:33 PM
Can't help but think that it isn't a good sign that the most recent two US presidents were someone who used to call Theresa May "Mrs Thatcher" and someone who doesn't know the name of the country he's attempting to obtain.
the day after the referendum result my boss bought everyone in the office some of the most unusually shaped bananas he could find to cheer us up
Facebook reminds me that on this day in 2017 a woman turned to me in the veg section of Sainsbury's and said "hopefully now we've left the EU we can have loose carrots that aren't wet"
January 21, 2026 at 9:48 AM
the day after the referendum result my boss bought everyone in the office some of the most unusually shaped bananas he could find to cheer us up
I feel like this fact needs an addendum noting that the most prominent and recognisable Green party politician in the country at the time was almost certainly David Icke.
Fun fact: the highest % the Greens ever achieved in an election was 15% in 1989.
One of the people who voted for them then was.....
Nigel Farage.
One of the people who voted for them then was.....
Nigel Farage.
New post just out:
What's the Greens' Ceiling? Can they do to Labour what Reform has done to the Conseratives?
I look at a lot of data to assess whether the Greens can get into first place in the "left bloc" - and what's holding them back.
(£/free trial)
open.substack.com/pub/samf/p/w...
What's the Greens' Ceiling? Can they do to Labour what Reform has done to the Conseratives?
I look at a lot of data to assess whether the Greens can get into first place in the "left bloc" - and what's holding them back.
(£/free trial)
open.substack.com/pub/samf/p/w...
January 20, 2026 at 12:46 PM
I feel like this fact needs an addendum noting that the most prominent and recognisable Green party politician in the country at the time was almost certainly David Icke.
some of us are old enough to remember that theresa may used to call a press conference in order to say absolutely nothing of substance all the time
January 19, 2026 at 11:16 AM
some of us are old enough to remember that theresa may used to call a press conference in order to say absolutely nothing of substance all the time
1. Sing Li. Not strictly a restaurant but the best chip shop Brighton has ever seen. Essentially just a living room in a weird green tiled house by the station where Sing Li would serve up incredible fish and chips whilst his wife and children watched Chinese soap operas in the background.
Sunday night timeline cleanse
please tell me about your favorite lost restaurant (closed for at least 5 years, like I really want you to go back into the vault), why you loved it and what you ate there
please tell me about your favorite lost restaurant (closed for at least 5 years, like I really want you to go back into the vault), why you loved it and what you ate there
January 19, 2026 at 10:07 AM
1. Sing Li. Not strictly a restaurant but the best chip shop Brighton has ever seen. Essentially just a living room in a weird green tiled house by the station where Sing Li would serve up incredible fish and chips whilst his wife and children watched Chinese soap operas in the background.
The only reason this isn't the worst example of "giving your nobel prize medal to someone terrible" is because Norwegian novelist and racist weirdo Knut Hamsun decided to post his Nobel Prize for Literature medal to Joseph Goebbels
![Hamsun wrote several newspaper articles in the course of the Second World War, including his notorious 1940 assertion that "the Germans are fighting for us, and now are crushing England's tyranny over us and all neutrals".[26] In 1943, he sent Germany's minister of propaganda Joseph Goebbels his Nobel Prize medal as a gift.[36] Hamsun's biographer Thorkild Hansen interpreted this as part of the strategy to get an audience with Hitler.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:gk4x4q5li5lqhwurjhm4zeiv/bafkreidhyi7g246yk4soskbyseewuvxu2nt3j67cbwlzkxgf3ms7mzzkfu@jpeg)
January 16, 2026 at 1:41 PM
The only reason this isn't the worst example of "giving your nobel prize medal to someone terrible" is because Norwegian novelist and racist weirdo Knut Hamsun decided to post his Nobel Prize for Literature medal to Joseph Goebbels
A load of onions washed up on the beach and someone rescued a load of them and ate them and things are kicking off on Facebook. Am now very invested in the sea-onion-saga. #TeamOnion
January 16, 2026 at 9:24 AM
A load of onions washed up on the beach and someone rescued a load of them and ate them and things are kicking off on Facebook. Am now very invested in the sea-onion-saga. #TeamOnion
savaged by a dead snake
Party sources say that Jenrick's planned resignation speech included vicious criticism of shadow cabinet colleagues, including Priti Patel and Mel Stride.
January 15, 2026 at 12:56 PM
savaged by a dead snake
would be quite funny if reform refuse to accept jenrick after all this
January 15, 2026 at 11:31 AM
would be quite funny if reform refuse to accept jenrick after all this