Mike Ensminger Fan Account
@laplanck.bsky.social
Love and Honor, Wahoowa. Started 740, now 714. Please see @tousledpigtails.bsky.social for legal advice.
How is this not correct, LinkedIn
January 3, 2026 at 9:05 AM
How is this not correct, LinkedIn
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
grim posthumous scenario i had not previously considered: you post a picture of the missile headed straight for you, and are memorialized by a bunch of random assholes complaining about alt text
![A Bluesky user based in Venezuela posted 'I live near a military air base and five earth-shaking explosions were just heart.'
User @thenordic.bsky.social (a random asshole) replied 'was it too hard for you to to [sic] add a link?' along with a link to an AP piece. Quick, don't look, what do you think the odds are that this user responded gracefully to being told that OP was on the ground and reporting firsthand?](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ycbmujtxprrwbkiw3x5qsyz4/bafkreieh2ddespqvcqdhpfy4g2higsw4lfiguzpaxs3rdessztcokmww6i@jpeg)
January 3, 2026 at 8:21 AM
grim posthumous scenario i had not previously considered: you post a picture of the missile headed straight for you, and are memorialized by a bunch of random assholes complaining about alt text
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
GOP legislators are not elected lawmakers, they are social media influencers that happen to be older than your usual twitch streamer
Sorry can’t do the very important not congressionally authorized war on Venezuela because too busy conducting spur of the moment strikes in Nigeria.
Absolutely out of control. Where is Congress?
Absolutely out of control. Where is Congress?
#BREAKING from me and Jennifer Jacobs - additional reporting on the strikes in Venezuela.
January 3, 2026 at 8:42 AM
GOP legislators are not elected lawmakers, they are social media influencers that happen to be older than your usual twitch streamer
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
*other journalists
Also: It is important to remember that we’re now going into this with the zombie propaganda Pentagon press corps. So, that sucks and will make things even more complicated.
Also: It is important to remember that we’re now going into this with the zombie propaganda Pentagon press corps. So, that sucks and will make things even more complicated.
January 3, 2026 at 8:37 AM
*other journalists
Also: It is important to remember that we’re now going into this with the zombie propaganda Pentagon press corps. So, that sucks and will make things even more complicated.
Also: It is important to remember that we’re now going into this with the zombie propaganda Pentagon press corps. So, that sucks and will make things even more complicated.
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
The members who did the "don't follow illegal orders" video absolutely need to immediately do a "hey these were the illegal orders we were talking about and participating in them can expect to face consequences to the fullest extent of the law" video
Uniformed military are involved in this shambolic behavior and they all need to be held to account
A primary goal of the discussion now on dragging dem pols to do the right thing has to be on widespread accountability and where appropriate prosecutions of significant numbers of servicemembers
A primary goal of the discussion now on dragging dem pols to do the right thing has to be on widespread accountability and where appropriate prosecutions of significant numbers of servicemembers
Inexcusable shit.
January 3, 2026 at 8:29 AM
The members who did the "don't follow illegal orders" video absolutely need to immediately do a "hey these were the illegal orders we were talking about and participating in them can expect to face consequences to the fullest extent of the law" video
Here’s what we ended up with. Gonna refrigerate and see how bouncy it is.
January 3, 2026 at 8:27 AM
Here’s what we ended up with. Gonna refrigerate and see how bouncy it is.
🎵James said
The doctrine is Monroe🎵
The doctrine is Monroe🎵
January 3, 2026 at 8:00 AM
🎵James said
The doctrine is Monroe🎵
The doctrine is Monroe🎵
So this is the experiment. I had a quart of homemade chicken foot stock left over. I also had a good amount of trinity left over. Sautéed the trinity. Have added the stock. Going to reduce by half and strain into a container. Presumably about 2 cups of very gelatinous substance left.
January 3, 2026 at 7:57 AM
So this is the experiment. I had a quart of homemade chicken foot stock left over. I also had a good amount of trinity left over. Sautéed the trinity. Have added the stock. Going to reduce by half and strain into a container. Presumably about 2 cups of very gelatinous substance left.
“How did you spend the first night of the Venezuelan War?”
“Sweating down leftover Holy Trinity as a first step in making something like homemade chicken Demi-glace”
“Sweating down leftover Holy Trinity as a first step in making something like homemade chicken Demi-glace”
January 3, 2026 at 7:38 AM
“How did you spend the first night of the Venezuelan War?”
“Sweating down leftover Holy Trinity as a first step in making something like homemade chicken Demi-glace”
“Sweating down leftover Holy Trinity as a first step in making something like homemade chicken Demi-glace”
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
lol i turned to fox for ten seconds to see if they were covering it and i instantly heard the anchor asking the guest to explain why this was legal and justified
January 3, 2026 at 7:05 AM
lol i turned to fox for ten seconds to see if they were covering it and i instantly heard the anchor asking the guest to explain why this was legal and justified
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
I think this administration has vastly overestimated the rest of the world's willingness to put up with imperial oil war bullshit right now. I don't think this ends well. No war.
January 3, 2026 at 6:38 AM
I think this administration has vastly overestimated the rest of the world's willingness to put up with imperial oil war bullshit right now. I don't think this ends well. No war.
Can’t believe I’ve hung out at a Hamas bar in Wrigleyville multiple times
January 3, 2026 at 5:59 AM
Can’t believe I’ve hung out at a Hamas bar in Wrigleyville multiple times
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
The mortician could do the funniest thing
December 30, 2025 at 1:38 PM
The mortician could do the funniest thing
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
In a statement, an emotional Grok told me it was "shaken" by the revenge porn it had generated. "It's not epic, and not based," Grok said. "It's neither. Frankly, it's cringe. And gay." An emailed request for comment to X received an auto-reply of a rofl emoji and a custom swastika emoji.
January 3, 2026 at 5:29 AM
In a statement, an emotional Grok told me it was "shaken" by the revenge porn it had generated. "It's not epic, and not based," Grok said. "It's neither. Frankly, it's cringe. And gay." An emailed request for comment to X received an auto-reply of a rofl emoji and a custom swastika emoji.
Finally got those roses.
January 3, 2026 at 3:21 AM
Finally got those roses.
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
accidentally photoshopped a bunch of steve buscemi cursed images: thread
January 2, 2026 at 9:03 PM
accidentally photoshopped a bunch of steve buscemi cursed images: thread
Gee Judge Van Dyke, which governor signed that into law? Hmmmm?
January 3, 2026 at 12:54 AM
Gee Judge Van Dyke, which governor signed that into law? Hmmmm?
One condiment to rule them all
One condiment to find them
One condiment to bring them all
And between two slices bind them
One condiment to find them
One condiment to bring them all
And between two slices bind them
POV: you're making new friends at the @dukesmayobowl.bsky.social
January 3, 2026 at 12:46 AM
One condiment to rule them all
One condiment to find them
One condiment to bring them all
And between two slices bind them
One condiment to find them
One condiment to bring them all
And between two slices bind them
Second indoor play place in two days
January 2, 2026 at 9:16 PM
Second indoor play place in two days
Gibson Dunn supposedly demands law school transcripts from lateral partner hires, I guess this ridiculousness isn’t totally unprecedented
This article advocates for the “Faculty Merit Act” that would — get this — require all faculty applicants to submit their *SAT* scores. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Holy shirts that’s hilarious.
January 2, 2026 at 6:32 PM
Gibson Dunn supposedly demands law school transcripts from lateral partner hires, I guess this ridiculousness isn’t totally unprecedented
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
You don’t need to know a single fact about Somali Americans to know the campaign against them is morally hideous. Either you can recognize that these campaigns are wrong a priori, or you are in your heart a racist.
I was wondering why their is so much random racist discourse on Somalis on the TL rn but oh it’s election season for governor rn lol
January 2, 2026 at 5:55 AM
You don’t need to know a single fact about Somali Americans to know the campaign against them is morally hideous. Either you can recognize that these campaigns are wrong a priori, or you are in your heart a racist.
Reposted by Mike Ensminger Fan Account
Criminals fleeing New York as Mamdani takes charge
Some news — George Santos has fled NYC due to Zohran Mamdani.
January 2, 2026 at 5:27 AM
Criminals fleeing New York as Mamdani takes charge