Tofurky Enjoyer
banner
farris.bsky.social
Tofurky Enjoyer
@farris.bsky.social
Former JCPenny model (1985-86).

San Luis Obispo, CA
(some of my faves who were implicated)

“Not for me, thanks.”
November 21, 2025 at 3:21 PM
That’s right. (w @marcusborton.bsky.social)
November 21, 2025 at 2:44 AM
Okay two different flight attendants have noticed my King Arthur Flour hat and we’ve talked baking. Everything is fixed again.
Flying might be the most irredeemable activity in this country. There is nothing anyone can do to fix it.
November 20, 2025 at 7:19 PM
Flying might be the most irredeemable activity in this country. There is nothing anyone can do to fix it.
November 20, 2025 at 4:11 PM
Not going to allow someone named "Perry Bacon" to dictate how high my blood pressure is today, thanks.
November 18, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Getting dangerously close to turning on the heat and I’m so embarrassed about it.
November 18, 2025 at 12:03 AM
Reposted by Tofurky Enjoyer
the year 2000: i can't believe these dumbass kids made a show about kicking each other in the balls

the year 2025: i can't believe our most respectable national public figures used to make a show about kicking each other in the balls
Instead of the Nuzzi shit, let's focus on the fact that apparently Johnny Knoxville got married this past weekend, the wedding was officiated by John Waters, and a dog was involved
November 17, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Reposted by Tofurky Enjoyer
Couldn't remember Jon Hamm's name or the name of his character. So I made a discovery
November 17, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Probably 30-40% of all the world's problems could be solved if we could just get Jim Adkins and the boys locked in a room until they give humanity another song as great as A Praise Chorus.
November 17, 2025 at 5:42 PM
We raised more than $2,250 for the local food bank at bar trivia. I am as glass-half-empty as anyone but that was a really good thing to get to be a part of.
November 17, 2025 at 3:03 AM
he only went and set a PR while winking at Lisa before almost eating it in the mud at the finish line
November 16, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Half-Marathon! at the Atmospheric River
November 16, 2025 at 2:16 PM
We are on Day 2 of 4 Days of Rain and I’m smashing the Emergency Chili button.
November 16, 2025 at 1:05 AM
It is kind of cool that none of my faves have been implicated. I’ve got that going for me.
November 15, 2025 at 5:51 AM
Excellent news. Now to sit back and watch while the grocery stores (who don't have a monopoly, by the way) lower prices in good faith.
November 14, 2025 at 11:07 PM
It’s completely insane to me that we haven’t paid reparations to A NUMBER of people.
"my least woke opinion is---"

That's enough. We've had enough people indulging in the "thrill of a little conservatism", as a treat. Of considering reactionary thought to be a salacious and taboo in a world descending into reactionary mania.

Give me your MOST woke opinions. We're bringing it back.
November 14, 2025 at 5:59 PM
I am absolutely terrible at pastry but am going to try to make a savory pumpkin pie for dinner.
November 13, 2025 at 7:15 PM
Set up a blanket fort for Her Majesty.
November 13, 2025 at 6:21 PM
Reposted by Tofurky Enjoyer
A lot of people have said this already but I have gone from "Epstein probably just killed himself" to "Donald Trump personally performed Sub-Zero's Spine Ripper Fatality on Epstein right there in his cell."
Lutnick is the current Secretary of Commerce and Epstein sent this email three months before he died.
Epstein mocked Trump for “leaving his nose print on the glass” while watching young women, wrote that Trump knew about illicit activity tied to Mar-a-Lago, and visited “many times,” and noted Trump’s planned visit to his neighbor Howard Lutnick’s house.
November 13, 2025 at 12:50 AM
Man it seems like there's only one thing these guys loved more than sending emails to each other and that's doing sex crimes.
November 12, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Found out someone I went to college with died of cancer and Meta thought it would be a great idea to suggest I follow that person on instagram.
November 12, 2025 at 5:08 PM
Reposted by Tofurky Enjoyer
so what's gonna happen
🚨BREAKING: Oversight Dems have received new emails from Jeffrey Epstein’s estate that raise serious questions about Donald Trump and his knowledge of Epstein’s horrific crimes.

Read them for yourself. It’s time to end this cover-up and RELEASE THE FILES.
November 12, 2025 at 2:29 PM
Reposted by Tofurky Enjoyer
I would like to take this opportunity to get on the record and apologize: I had complained about how every single thing at the grocery store now costs five dollars more than it used to, but I had not seen the latest data from DoorDash's State of Local Commerce report, which disproves that.
At some point embarrassment MUST come
November 11, 2025 at 7:49 PM
They're going to ban the Premier League, aren't they.
November 11, 2025 at 4:30 PM
Really excited to be flying in 2 weeks!!
TRUMP: US TO LAUNCH NEW AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL SYSTEM WITHIN 2–3 WEEKS
November 11, 2025 at 3:52 AM