Dread Pirate Zed
@dreadpiratezed.bsky.social
Just trying to get through it all with my soul intact. Badlife and proud of it. He/him
Well, that felt pretty good.
I solved the daily Clues by Sam, Dec 3rd 2025 (Tricky), in 05:25
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cluesbysam.com
I solved the daily Clues by Sam, Dec 3rd 2025 (Tricky), in 05:25
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cluesbysam.com
December 3, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Well, that felt pretty good.
I solved the daily Clues by Sam, Dec 3rd 2025 (Tricky), in 05:25
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cluesbysam.com
I solved the daily Clues by Sam, Dec 3rd 2025 (Tricky), in 05:25
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cluesbysam.com
Dear software developers: I think it's great that you've added the ability to check for updates when your app starts. But could you, please, also make the updater prompt the user to close the existing program so the updater can run? It would save LOTS of tech support calls.
December 3, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Dear software developers: I think it's great that you've added the ability to check for updates when your app starts. But could you, please, also make the updater prompt the user to close the existing program so the updater can run? It would save LOTS of tech support calls.
I just realized that "Fala lala la, la la la la" simply means "Do you speak lala la, la la la la?" in Portuguese.
December 3, 2025 at 6:05 AM
I just realized that "Fala lala la, la la la la" simply means "Do you speak lala la, la la la la?" in Portuguese.
Old joke -
Q: Why is Denny's for optimists, and Norm's for pessimists?
A: "Denny's - Always open!" vs. "Norm's - we never close..."
Q: Why is Denny's for optimists, and Norm's for pessimists?
A: "Denny's - Always open!" vs. "Norm's - we never close..."
December 2, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Old joke -
Q: Why is Denny's for optimists, and Norm's for pessimists?
A: "Denny's - Always open!" vs. "Norm's - we never close..."
Q: Why is Denny's for optimists, and Norm's for pessimists?
A: "Denny's - Always open!" vs. "Norm's - we never close..."
"Winter Sleepers". I'd been blown away by "Run Lola Run" and was excited to see Tom Tykwer's other work; this movie was fascinating, but (for me at the time) deeply unsatisfying. (Though when "Memento" came out, it felt oddly familiar!)
Tom Tykwer returned to form with "Babylon Berlin" - so good!
Tom Tykwer returned to form with "Babylon Berlin" - so good!
December 2, 2025 at 5:19 PM
"Winter Sleepers". I'd been blown away by "Run Lola Run" and was excited to see Tom Tykwer's other work; this movie was fascinating, but (for me at the time) deeply unsatisfying. (Though when "Memento" came out, it felt oddly familiar!)
Tom Tykwer returned to form with "Babylon Berlin" - so good!
Tom Tykwer returned to form with "Babylon Berlin" - so good!
In the 70s, "pyramid scheme" wasn't yet a generic term; con men still openly called it The Pyramid Scheme, and the name alone wasn't enough to send the rubes running.
I can't find it online, but there was a song on the radio
🎶It's the great American Dream!
Put your money in the Pyramid Scheme!🎶
I can't find it online, but there was a song on the radio
🎶It's the great American Dream!
Put your money in the Pyramid Scheme!🎶
December 1, 2025 at 10:09 PM
In the 70s, "pyramid scheme" wasn't yet a generic term; con men still openly called it The Pyramid Scheme, and the name alone wasn't enough to send the rubes running.
I can't find it online, but there was a song on the radio
🎶It's the great American Dream!
Put your money in the Pyramid Scheme!🎶
I can't find it online, but there was a song on the radio
🎶It's the great American Dream!
Put your money in the Pyramid Scheme!🎶
Reposted by Dread Pirate Zed
Russia is invading Ukraine. It is important that Ukraine pay the price. Preferably to us directly.
by Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff
by Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff
December 1, 2025 at 3:18 PM
Russia is invading Ukraine. It is important that Ukraine pay the price. Preferably to us directly.
by Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff
by Jared Kushner and Steve Witkoff
Old Navy Federal Credit Union
December 1, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Old Navy Federal Credit Union
Cantique de Noël (O Holy Night)
and
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas*
* "muddle through somehow" version, of course
and
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas*
* "muddle through somehow" version, of course
What is your favorite "Christian" Christmas song and what is your favorite "Secular" Christmas song?
I will probably always adore "O Come All Ye Faithful" and "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" for Christian.
And "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" for secular.
I will probably always adore "O Come All Ye Faithful" and "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" for Christian.
And "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" for secular.
December 1, 2025 at 4:34 AM
Cantique de Noël (O Holy Night)
and
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas*
* "muddle through somehow" version, of course
and
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas*
* "muddle through somehow" version, of course
Lost my brother-in-law (and one of my best friends) this morning. RIP Jimmy - you're leaving a big hole in the world.
November 30, 2025 at 8:39 PM
Lost my brother-in-law (and one of my best friends) this morning. RIP Jimmy - you're leaving a big hole in the world.
Paul Bunyan and his pulse ox, Babe
November 30, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Paul Bunyan and his pulse ox, Babe
@profanity.accountant please assess
November 29, 2025 at 11:44 PM
@profanity.accountant please assess
I've been making karaoke versions of obscure songs I'd like to sing. One thing in particular cracks me up:
Ages ago, the leading subtitle app was "Star Station Alpha"; its .SSA files became a de facto standard.
It was superseded by Advanced StarStation Alpha - so now we use .ASS files. Progress!
Ages ago, the leading subtitle app was "Star Station Alpha"; its .SSA files became a de facto standard.
It was superseded by Advanced StarStation Alpha - so now we use .ASS files. Progress!
November 29, 2025 at 5:49 PM
I've been making karaoke versions of obscure songs I'd like to sing. One thing in particular cracks me up:
Ages ago, the leading subtitle app was "Star Station Alpha"; its .SSA files became a de facto standard.
It was superseded by Advanced StarStation Alpha - so now we use .ASS files. Progress!
Ages ago, the leading subtitle app was "Star Station Alpha"; its .SSA files became a de facto standard.
It was superseded by Advanced StarStation Alpha - so now we use .ASS files. Progress!
Happy NoFucksGiven, everybody!
November 28, 2025 at 4:16 AM
Happy NoFucksGiven, everybody!
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen—
Pink Floyd
James
Cesaria Evora
Lenny Kravitz
The The
Pink Floyd
James
Cesaria Evora
Lenny Kravitz
The The
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen—
OutKast
Waylon & Willie
Willie
The Roots
Cassandra Wilson
OutKast
Waylon & Willie
Willie
The Roots
Cassandra Wilson
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen —
Van Halen (obviously)
Childish Gambino
Wu-Tang Clan
Ozzy
Earth Wind and Fire
Van Halen (obviously)
Childish Gambino
Wu-Tang Clan
Ozzy
Earth Wind and Fire
November 28, 2025 at 2:38 AM
Introduce yourself with five concerts you've seen—
Pink Floyd
James
Cesaria Evora
Lenny Kravitz
The The
Pink Floyd
James
Cesaria Evora
Lenny Kravitz
The The
Every day, I see dozens of screenshots of text on this here website, and while I appreciate that lots of y'all do put a transcript into the alt-text... would it KILL you to, y'know, add a citation or a link so we don't have to just guess at the context?
November 27, 2025 at 2:22 AM
Every day, I see dozens of screenshots of text on this here website, and while I appreciate that lots of y'all do put a transcript into the alt-text... would it KILL you to, y'know, add a citation or a link so we don't have to just guess at the context?
My sister and I were talking yesterday about alternative nicknames for the dog; she suggested "Canine 2.0", but I think "ChienGPT" is appropriate. (Little dude has occasional flashes of apparent understanding, interspersed with flatulence.)
November 25, 2025 at 9:20 PM
My sister and I were talking yesterday about alternative nicknames for the dog; she suggested "Canine 2.0", but I think "ChienGPT" is appropriate. (Little dude has occasional flashes of apparent understanding, interspersed with flatulence.)
Your periodic reminder that "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps" is NOT POSSIBLE. It started as a joke about people so dumb that they thought they could do just that; it's now constantly repeated by people so dumb that they think _you_ should do it.
November 25, 2025 at 5:16 AM
Your periodic reminder that "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps" is NOT POSSIBLE. It started as a joke about people so dumb that they thought they could do just that; it's now constantly repeated by people so dumb that they think _you_ should do it.
Reposted by Dread Pirate Zed
I'm against pardoning turkeys because it implies that we are eating them as a punishment for their crimes instead of our own
November 24, 2025 at 6:02 AM
I'm against pardoning turkeys because it implies that we are eating them as a punishment for their crimes instead of our own
Reposted by Dread Pirate Zed
Little used Flag Code Provision that allows the flag to drop to the ground if it appears the President will also drop to the ground.
November 22, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Little used Flag Code Provision that allows the flag to drop to the ground if it appears the President will also drop to the ground.
Reposted by Dread Pirate Zed
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
Re-upping an old joke in honor of Sidney Sweeney's boxing movie:
bsky.app/profile/drea...
bsky.app/profile/drea...
Original working title for "Million Dollar Baby":
"She Stoops to Conk Her"
"She Stoops to Conk Her"
November 21, 2025 at 5:47 AM
Re-upping an old joke in honor of Sidney Sweeney's boxing movie:
bsky.app/profile/drea...
bsky.app/profile/drea...
At karaoke tonight, did pretty well with my first song - mostly because my turn came up before I'd had more than a sip or two of my beer. My second song was... not good. Lost most of my upper mid-range in less than half an hour.
Lesson: no beer for me at karaoke! At home now, drinking rye.
Lesson: no beer for me at karaoke! At home now, drinking rye.
November 21, 2025 at 5:45 AM
At karaoke tonight, did pretty well with my first song - mostly because my turn came up before I'd had more than a sip or two of my beer. My second song was... not good. Lost most of my upper mid-range in less than half an hour.
Lesson: no beer for me at karaoke! At home now, drinking rye.
Lesson: no beer for me at karaoke! At home now, drinking rye.
Reposted by Dread Pirate Zed
this is the correct way to react to anything the president says-
November 20, 2025 at 9:00 PM
this is the correct way to react to anything the president says-
It's-a me, Scam Likely!
November 20, 2025 at 4:51 PM
It's-a me, Scam Likely!