Mommy Shortlegs
@coolhandkas.bsky.social
she/her
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Join Posts.docx, the nothing app
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1l704FtF-7_OQSKiFrw_GIPwMwLtoGvAu/edit?usp=drivesdk&ouid=111211770282405088388&rtpof=true&sd=true
Pinned
nice argument, too bad I have already depicted you as the lowly, pathetic Vagabond Joker and myself as the cool, popular Stuntman Joker
Had a guy ask me for a reprint of a receipt he lost, he goes "it's for Caterpillar pants" I go "dang those pants must have a ton of legs" he didn't laugh. I laughed a lot. That's showbiz baby
November 14, 2025 at 12:18 AM
Had a guy ask me for a reprint of a receipt he lost, he goes "it's for Caterpillar pants" I go "dang those pants must have a ton of legs" he didn't laugh. I laughed a lot. That's showbiz baby
men fuckin piss me off
November 13, 2025 at 10:35 PM
men fuckin piss me off
still green with envy over the woman who told me yesterday that she isn't interested in our credit card because she only spends her husband's money so she doesn't care about cash back 😒 that should be me but I love it for her nonetheless
November 13, 2025 at 4:38 PM
still green with envy over the woman who told me yesterday that she isn't interested in our credit card because she only spends her husband's money so she doesn't care about cash back 😒 that should be me but I love it for her nonetheless
do u guys think that the country who let their government fuck off for 40 days without consequence is gonna suddenly do something now because their pres is a pedophile. do we think after letting concentration camps slide for a year they're gonna take his ass down for being part of a child rape cabal
November 13, 2025 at 7:33 AM
do u guys think that the country who let their government fuck off for 40 days without consequence is gonna suddenly do something now because their pres is a pedophile. do we think after letting concentration camps slide for a year they're gonna take his ass down for being part of a child rape cabal
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
November 5, 2025 at 11:06 PM
damn we need some better drug addiction support around here, just left work where a lady shoplifted a backpack of clothes and told us to fuck off only to see that exact same lady at superstore 15 minutes later shoplifting a bag of clothes and telling them to fuck off
November 13, 2025 at 3:56 AM
damn we need some better drug addiction support around here, just left work where a lady shoplifted a backpack of clothes and told us to fuck off only to see that exact same lady at superstore 15 minutes later shoplifting a bag of clothes and telling them to fuck off
I do not mind pushing carts at work at all but what I do hate is how men will see me doing this and think I need/want them to help me
November 13, 2025 at 12:26 AM
I do not mind pushing carts at work at all but what I do hate is how men will see me doing this and think I need/want them to help me
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
these epstein emails are pretty damning. i sure hope that we haven't spent the last couple years in a cultural backslide where men are seemingly allowed to openly and gleefully fantasize about dominating young women without any threat of reproach
November 12, 2025 at 8:20 PM
these epstein emails are pretty damning. i sure hope that we haven't spent the last couple years in a cultural backslide where men are seemingly allowed to openly and gleefully fantasize about dominating young women without any threat of reproach
getting into houseplants in Edmonton is very simple you just need to buy like 10 different grow lights and keep them on all day long
November 12, 2025 at 5:09 PM
getting into houseplants in Edmonton is very simple you just need to buy like 10 different grow lights and keep them on all day long
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
guy who finally decides today he has enough information to conclude donald trump is a pedophile
November 12, 2025 at 2:41 PM
guy who finally decides today he has enough information to conclude donald trump is a pedophile
if you're in America and didn't witness the northern lights don't feel bad, it's simply because you, as a nation, don't deserve nice things
November 12, 2025 at 6:17 AM
if you're in America and didn't witness the northern lights don't feel bad, it's simply because you, as a nation, don't deserve nice things
I was really cooking last night when I added a 1 kg bag of gummy frogs to the amazon order I was pushing through
November 12, 2025 at 5:51 AM
I was really cooking last night when I added a 1 kg bag of gummy frogs to the amazon order I was pushing through
marked safe from poopin my pants today ✅
bringing only raw vegetables and hummus in my lunch today was very cash money of me and will surely result in zero digestive troubles
November 12, 2025 at 5:13 AM
marked safe from poopin my pants today ✅
bringing only raw vegetables and hummus in my lunch today was very cash money of me and will surely result in zero digestive troubles
November 12, 2025 at 12:07 AM
bringing only raw vegetables and hummus in my lunch today was very cash money of me and will surely result in zero digestive troubles
ADHD is basically just 90% being frustrated that I live like this and 10% hilarious comedy blooper reel
November 11, 2025 at 5:33 PM
ADHD is basically just 90% being frustrated that I live like this and 10% hilarious comedy blooper reel
It's so weird to me that we consider Victoria Day a holiday but not Remembrance Day. Like yeah the mega mart is still open, business as usual, just gonna play a lil pre-recorded bugle music at 11 and force the staff/patrons to make uncomfortable eye contact in silence for a minute
November 11, 2025 at 4:49 PM
It's so weird to me that we consider Victoria Day a holiday but not Remembrance Day. Like yeah the mega mart is still open, business as usual, just gonna play a lil pre-recorded bugle music at 11 and force the staff/patrons to make uncomfortable eye contact in silence for a minute
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Everyday I'm furious that our provincial gov't is making Albertans pay for their Covid-19 vaccine that no other Canadian resident has to pay for.
November 10, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Everyday I'm furious that our provincial gov't is making Albertans pay for their Covid-19 vaccine that no other Canadian resident has to pay for.
I cannot resist a sad philodendron 🙄
November 10, 2025 at 9:59 PM
I cannot resist a sad philodendron 🙄
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
I will continue culling every ostrich in this country until measles is eradicated (aide whispers something in my ear) I don’t give a fuck it’s on sight with ostriches
WASHINGTON (AP) — Canada has lost its measles elimination status because of continued spread, international health experts say.
November 10, 2025 at 4:29 PM
I will continue culling every ostrich in this country until measles is eradicated (aide whispers something in my ear) I don’t give a fuck it’s on sight with ostriches
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Better late than never
November 10, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Better late than never
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Experts speaking about Canada's loss of measles elimination status: "We have major gaps in our public health infrastructure."
The gap in that infrastructure:
The gap in that infrastructure:
November 10, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Experts speaking about Canada's loss of measles elimination status: "We have major gaps in our public health infrastructure."
The gap in that infrastructure:
The gap in that infrastructure:
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Childhood vaccinations have declined since the outbreak of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020.
But what also happened in 2020 was irreparable damage to our public health system that has never recovered.
How many of you are currently without a family doctor?
But what also happened in 2020 was irreparable damage to our public health system that has never recovered.
How many of you are currently without a family doctor?
November 10, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Childhood vaccinations have declined since the outbreak of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020.
But what also happened in 2020 was irreparable damage to our public health system that has never recovered.
How many of you are currently without a family doctor?
But what also happened in 2020 was irreparable damage to our public health system that has never recovered.
How many of you are currently without a family doctor?
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
Subway Cadbury Creme Egg Submelt (2023-2023): A 6-inch sub roll, filled with Cadbury Creme Eggs and grill-pressed until toasty golden brown. Was available for free, for one day only, at 4 Subway locations in the UK, with only 500 subs available at each location.
April 17, 2025 at 3:51 PM
Subway Cadbury Creme Egg Submelt (2023-2023): A 6-inch sub roll, filled with Cadbury Creme Eggs and grill-pressed until toasty golden brown. Was available for free, for one day only, at 4 Subway locations in the UK, with only 500 subs available at each location.
Reposted by Mommy Shortlegs
cop: did he send any texts around the time of the crash?
cop 2: he sent a post that reads “padding my three track album with 26 skits and interludes”
cop: not bad but it ain’t going viral
cop 2: posting isn’t just about going viral
cop: (sighs) not this shit again
cop 2: he sent a post that reads “padding my three track album with 26 skits and interludes”
cop: not bad but it ain’t going viral
cop 2: posting isn’t just about going viral
cop: (sighs) not this shit again
October 31, 2025 at 2:51 AM
cop: did he send any texts around the time of the crash?
cop 2: he sent a post that reads “padding my three track album with 26 skits and interludes”
cop: not bad but it ain’t going viral
cop 2: posting isn’t just about going viral
cop: (sighs) not this shit again
cop 2: he sent a post that reads “padding my three track album with 26 skits and interludes”
cop: not bad but it ain’t going viral
cop 2: posting isn’t just about going viral
cop: (sighs) not this shit again