Chase
@chaseburke.bsky.social
writer-type • on 3/13/25 the wordle was my name • chaseburke.com
Pinned
10/10. Back in the day there'd already be a whole Tumblr blog of just images like these with Civil War letter captions. It's not too late---someone can do it!
Dearest Martha,
The National Guard stand solemn watch at the Krispy Kreme tonight. I cannot tell if they defend the people from the donuts, or the donuts from the people. Powdered sugar hangs in the air like cannon smoke. Jensen took a hot coffee to the face, he may never recover.
Yours in glaze,
The National Guard stand solemn watch at the Krispy Kreme tonight. I cannot tell if they defend the people from the donuts, or the donuts from the people. Powdered sugar hangs in the air like cannon smoke. Jensen took a hot coffee to the face, he may never recover.
Yours in glaze,
August 27, 2025 at 11:03 PM
10/10. Back in the day there'd already be a whole Tumblr blog of just images like these with Civil War letter captions. It's not too late---someone can do it!
It's slow summer season, and I am out of practice. Where are we submitting longish short stories? What is even open? Is there a new go-to "quarterly submissions list" like the one Entropy used to run back in the day? What are we doing here? What is the point? Is everything just Substack now?
July 25, 2025 at 10:59 PM
It's slow summer season, and I am out of practice. Where are we submitting longish short stories? What is even open? Is there a new go-to "quarterly submissions list" like the one Entropy used to run back in the day? What are we doing here? What is the point? Is everything just Substack now?
The fact that The Equalizer 2 was not called The Sequelizer is emblematic of Hollywood's decades-long downward slide. In this essay I will
July 24, 2025 at 12:13 AM
The fact that The Equalizer 2 was not called The Sequelizer is emblematic of Hollywood's decades-long downward slide. In this essay I will
Reposted by Chase
Finally, James Gunn has delivered the gritty, realistic Superman that fans always wanted: a man with no powers who runs criminals over with his car
July 9, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Finally, James Gunn has delivered the gritty, realistic Superman that fans always wanted: a man with no powers who runs criminals over with his car
Reposted by Chase
Just curious --- what's the best (or, your favorite) "plot heavy" novel that still feels, you know, literary and well-written? Any genre or era will do.
July 8, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Just curious --- what's the best (or, your favorite) "plot heavy" novel that still feels, you know, literary and well-written? Any genre or era will do.
Just curious --- what's the best (or, your favorite) "plot heavy" novel that still feels, you know, literary and well-written? Any genre or era will do.
July 8, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Just curious --- what's the best (or, your favorite) "plot heavy" novel that still feels, you know, literary and well-written? Any genre or era will do.
My deeply held religious belief is that if you host a podcast of any kind, you are ineligible to hold public office.
June 18, 2025 at 6:25 PM
My deeply held religious belief is that if you host a podcast of any kind, you are ineligible to hold public office.
God Only Knows (Remastered 1996)
YouTube video by The Beach Boys - Topic
youtu.be
June 11, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Reposted by Chase
Reposted by Chase
there is not a single fast-casual chain bread that surpasses the cheddar bay biscuit. the cheddar bay biscuit is one of the greatest foodstuffs this country has ever produced. if you went back in time and gave a cheddar bay biscuit to george washington, the intensity of flavor would kill him
Bread is always good…. I don’t know what Cheesecake Factory does to that brown bread but it’s always good
Texas Roadhouse sprinkle something in those rolls cause I never had a bad tasting one
Outback brown bread be hitting too
If it’s one thing Olive Garden does good is them breadsticks
Texas Roadhouse sprinkle something in those rolls cause I never had a bad tasting one
Outback brown bread be hitting too
If it’s one thing Olive Garden does good is them breadsticks
June 5, 2025 at 12:38 AM
there is not a single fast-casual chain bread that surpasses the cheddar bay biscuit. the cheddar bay biscuit is one of the greatest foodstuffs this country has ever produced. if you went back in time and gave a cheddar bay biscuit to george washington, the intensity of flavor would kill him
It turns out that going for a run in the morning (when you are out of shape and 35 years old) makes you very tired by about, oh, the exact time I am sending this tweet.
June 2, 2025 at 10:59 PM
It turns out that going for a run in the morning (when you are out of shape and 35 years old) makes you very tired by about, oh, the exact time I am sending this tweet.
Reposted by Chase
Someone else said something very similar to this the other day, but.
It really burns me that our (millennials') generation was legally terrorized for like, downloading Radiohead discographies
But we're supposed to be ok with billionaires stealing human intellectual output in its entirety bc AI
It really burns me that our (millennials') generation was legally terrorized for like, downloading Radiohead discographies
But we're supposed to be ok with billionaires stealing human intellectual output in its entirety bc AI
May 31, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Someone else said something very similar to this the other day, but.
It really burns me that our (millennials') generation was legally terrorized for like, downloading Radiohead discographies
But we're supposed to be ok with billionaires stealing human intellectual output in its entirety bc AI
It really burns me that our (millennials') generation was legally terrorized for like, downloading Radiohead discographies
But we're supposed to be ok with billionaires stealing human intellectual output in its entirety bc AI
Reposted by Chase
Shall I be plain? I wish the bastards dead
May 30, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Shall I be plain? I wish the bastards dead
Anyone check in on those bored apes recently? Are they still stranded at that yacht club?
May 8, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Anyone check in on those bored apes recently? Are they still stranded at that yacht club?
Reposted by Chase
This is a craft essay.
whenever someone says writing efficiently means using the least amount of words possible remind them how we all say “jobs where you get to work with your hands” instead of “hand jobs”
April 25, 2025 at 1:08 AM
This is a craft essay.
Reposted by Chase
Vatican to announce its choice of a new Pope in a Signal group chat.
April 21, 2025 at 11:54 AM
Vatican to announce its choice of a new Pope in a Signal group chat.
Reposted by Chase
If Jesus had focused more on kitchen table issues and less on unpopular outcasts like lepers and prostitutes, he might have won more support from white working-class Judeans.
April 20, 2025 at 2:08 AM
If Jesus had focused more on kitchen table issues and less on unpopular outcasts like lepers and prostitutes, he might have won more support from white working-class Judeans.
The only version of Christianity I subscribe to: Goodtime Jesus
We celebrate this Easter Sunday with a reading from the Gospel according to James Tate.
April 20, 2025 at 3:56 PM
The only version of Christianity I subscribe to: Goodtime Jesus
Reposted by Chase
It is 2029. Luka Doncic, 375 pounds now, is eating an open faced turkey sandwich during the first TV timeout of the 4th quarter of Game 3 of the NBA Finals. Experts wonder if he’s fat enough to win a 4th straight title. President Ocasio-Cortes has invaded El Salvador.
February 18, 2025 at 1:08 AM
It is 2029. Luka Doncic, 375 pounds now, is eating an open faced turkey sandwich during the first TV timeout of the 4th quarter of Game 3 of the NBA Finals. Experts wonder if he’s fat enough to win a 4th straight title. President Ocasio-Cortes has invaded El Salvador.
Going to do the social media / newsletter grift thing but behind the paywall it's just my short story drafts.
April 16, 2025 at 3:05 AM
Going to do the social media / newsletter grift thing but behind the paywall it's just my short story drafts.
Reposted by Chase
"Age verification" laws are actually "upload your ID or get your face scanned to access every website, ending anonymity and associating your identity with everything you do online" laws and if more people understood that they would not be down for this authoritarian nonsense
April 2, 2025 at 12:57 PM
"Age verification" laws are actually "upload your ID or get your face scanned to access every website, ending anonymity and associating your identity with everything you do online" laws and if more people understood that they would not be down for this authoritarian nonsense
Reposted by Chase
Did you know fairy tales used to be wayyyy darker, like the man who hands out million dollar bribes but can’t afford a friend
April 2, 2025 at 6:33 AM
Did you know fairy tales used to be wayyyy darker, like the man who hands out million dollar bribes but can’t afford a friend