jack M
@balan.bsky.social
formerly the 3rd chipmunk in the famous band
i cant afford a sex robot so ive started jacking off with salad tongs and just pretending
November 19, 2025 at 10:17 AM
i cant afford a sex robot so ive started jacking off with salad tongs and just pretending
Reposted by jack M
Inflation is happening everywhere around the world and some people are fucking excited for the wrong reasons
July 29, 2023 at 2:12 AM
Inflation is happening everywhere around the world and some people are fucking excited for the wrong reasons
i like to find abandoned/vandalised drawings in wplace and fix them up
November 18, 2025 at 9:59 AM
i like to find abandoned/vandalised drawings in wplace and fix them up
Reposted by jack M
Reposted by jack M
I remember when we played Tomb Raiders instead of Arc Raiders. Instead of talking about AI we said ai yai yai that's the beautiful female figure.
November 15, 2025 at 6:47 AM
I remember when we played Tomb Raiders instead of Arc Raiders. Instead of talking about AI we said ai yai yai that's the beautiful female figure.
Reposted by jack M
(Rapping) I went to college for ten thousand years
November 4, 2025 at 8:13 AM
(Rapping) I went to college for ten thousand years
i had a dream i saw a movie in a group and then i got a survey email for the cinema that said Did your pasty tribe dig the vibe? which is so rude
November 11, 2025 at 9:46 AM
i had a dream i saw a movie in a group and then i got a survey email for the cinema that said Did your pasty tribe dig the vibe? which is so rude
someone needs to add CHOD here. chaos hatred oblivion disrespect
November 11, 2025 at 1:57 AM
someone needs to add CHOD here. chaos hatred oblivion disrespect
Reposted by jack M
half life 3 story leaked (it has small time travle elements)
you play the tutorial level in the womb, then when gordon is being born resonance cascade 2.0 happens. the hospital is in chaos... lights flashing
you pop out and a familar face! the doctor is-
BARNEY: hi gordon about that beer i owe ya
you play the tutorial level in the womb, then when gordon is being born resonance cascade 2.0 happens. the hospital is in chaos... lights flashing
you pop out and a familar face! the doctor is-
BARNEY: hi gordon about that beer i owe ya
February 20, 2025 at 11:00 PM
half life 3 story leaked (it has small time travle elements)
you play the tutorial level in the womb, then when gordon is being born resonance cascade 2.0 happens. the hospital is in chaos... lights flashing
you pop out and a familar face! the doctor is-
BARNEY: hi gordon about that beer i owe ya
you play the tutorial level in the womb, then when gordon is being born resonance cascade 2.0 happens. the hospital is in chaos... lights flashing
you pop out and a familar face! the doctor is-
BARNEY: hi gordon about that beer i owe ya
Reposted by jack M
Was looking through old game magazines again,
take a peek at this ancient print ad 📰😮
Wishlist on #steam: s.team/a/3723750 ✅👀
#gamedev #indiedev #1bit #habubis #ScreenshotSaturday
take a peek at this ancient print ad 📰😮
Wishlist on #steam: s.team/a/3723750 ✅👀
#gamedev #indiedev #1bit #habubis #ScreenshotSaturday
November 8, 2025 at 3:27 PM
Was looking through old game magazines again,
take a peek at this ancient print ad 📰😮
Wishlist on #steam: s.team/a/3723750 ✅👀
#gamedev #indiedev #1bit #habubis #ScreenshotSaturday
take a peek at this ancient print ad 📰😮
Wishlist on #steam: s.team/a/3723750 ✅👀
#gamedev #indiedev #1bit #habubis #ScreenshotSaturday
its called the xbox ROG Ally because they rogally fucked up when they made. it
November 8, 2025 at 4:07 PM
its called the xbox ROG Ally because they rogally fucked up when they made. it
crazy how theresgames called UNDER tale and OVER watch... and theyre both MID!
November 5, 2025 at 11:54 AM
crazy how theresgames called UNDER tale and OVER watch... and theyre both MID!
i have a cold and in my dream my dad bought me these from the pharmacy. thanks dad
November 4, 2025 at 9:47 AM
i have a cold and in my dream my dad bought me these from the pharmacy. thanks dad
we brought back someone's eli drawing after he was covered by a grotesque undertale for over a month in a wplace tragedy
November 3, 2025 at 12:16 PM
we brought back someone's eli drawing after he was covered by a grotesque undertale for over a month in a wplace tragedy
i think i watched the smack barm pey wet video too many times because i had a dream i was in a mysterious chippie, the menu only had numbers and you had to figure out what the orders were through trial & error and deduction.
October 27, 2025 at 11:13 PM
i think i watched the smack barm pey wet video too many times because i had a dream i was in a mysterious chippie, the menu only had numbers and you had to figure out what the orders were through trial & error and deduction.
Reposted by jack M
Me (entering building): ok, three potentially hostile males.. two potentially hostile females.. exit is behind me, stairs look defensib—
*fat guy i didnt see walks in front of me and farts in my face and i fall to the ground and start throwing up *
*fat guy i didnt see walks in front of me and farts in my face and i fall to the ground and start throwing up *
September 27, 2023 at 5:25 AM
Me (entering building): ok, three potentially hostile males.. two potentially hostile females.. exit is behind me, stairs look defensib—
*fat guy i didnt see walks in front of me and farts in my face and i fall to the ground and start throwing up *
*fat guy i didnt see walks in front of me and farts in my face and i fall to the ground and start throwing up *
something thats been stuck in my head for 10 years is the avgn star wars episode where he says thered a game called "chewie's wookie cookie cookin"
October 22, 2025 at 10:11 AM
something thats been stuck in my head for 10 years is the avgn star wars episode where he says thered a game called "chewie's wookie cookie cookin"
Reposted by jack M
Long long ago there was a HENTAI boy whoes name was
MOMODERA in SENDAI.His work was making programes on
SM-777,it was not selled well.One day he got
a post of programmer.He worked hard everyday.One day,
he eat hummberger of MC.And he dead.
MOMODERA in SENDAI.His work was making programes on
SM-777,it was not selled well.One day he got
a post of programmer.He worked hard everyday.One day,
he eat hummberger of MC.And he dead.
October 15, 2025 at 3:00 PM
Long long ago there was a HENTAI boy whoes name was
MOMODERA in SENDAI.His work was making programes on
SM-777,it was not selled well.One day he got
a post of programmer.He worked hard everyday.One day,
he eat hummberger of MC.And he dead.
MOMODERA in SENDAI.His work was making programes on
SM-777,it was not selled well.One day he got
a post of programmer.He worked hard everyday.One day,
he eat hummberger of MC.And he dead.
Reposted by jack M
Reposted by jack M
I wonder how fast I can touch my nose hairs.
October 12, 2025 at 8:23 PM
I wonder how fast I can touch my nose hairs.
musk has announced grok 7.0 which can pretend to be any character from hazbin hotel, mcdonalds etc who you can then engage in bouts of cybersex with
October 14, 2025 at 12:17 PM
musk has announced grok 7.0 which can pretend to be any character from hazbin hotel, mcdonalds etc who you can then engage in bouts of cybersex with
very disappointed by The Smashing Machine. i thought it was going to be about a delightful steampunk contraption
October 13, 2025 at 10:51 PM
very disappointed by The Smashing Machine. i thought it was going to be about a delightful steampunk contraption
having a crazy small micropenis must open up so many opportunities imagine if you could crack the top off a soft boiled egg and fuck the shit out of it
October 7, 2025 at 9:21 AM
having a crazy small micropenis must open up so many opportunities imagine if you could crack the top off a soft boiled egg and fuck the shit out of it
Reposted by jack M
Jane Goodall died today. The zoologist, ethnologist, and Shaolin master was defeated in a savage lightning storm upon the mountaintop by her former apprentice, a sinister chimp who has left to study at the Wu-Tang monastery. And now, it is left to me to avenge her. I will kill the evil Wu-Tang ape!
October 2, 2025 at 2:26 AM
Jane Goodall died today. The zoologist, ethnologist, and Shaolin master was defeated in a savage lightning storm upon the mountaintop by her former apprentice, a sinister chimp who has left to study at the Wu-Tang monastery. And now, it is left to me to avenge her. I will kill the evil Wu-Tang ape!