I say this with the heavy heart of someone who longed to be a parent. As an adoptee I believe it would have healed a thousand wounds caused by my adoption. But parenthood isn't an entitlement. It's not a selfish act. It's about raising the next generation. And my personal view...
December 19, 2025 at 7:48 PM
I say this with the heavy heart of someone who longed to be a parent. As an adoptee I believe it would have healed a thousand wounds caused by my adoption. But parenthood isn't an entitlement. It's not a selfish act. It's about raising the next generation. And my personal view...
Trump-hating adoptee here. Let’s fight racist immigration policies without defending international adoption, which is rife with trafficking, coercion, baby stealing, deception, corruption—and white saviorism.
Also, bc of these scandals it barely exists anymore.
www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/...
Also, bc of these scandals it barely exists anymore.
www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/...
International adoptions to the U.S. have slowed to a trickle, matching trends in other countries
After peaking in 2004, the annual number of international adoptions to the United States has fallen by 94% as of 2023.
www.pewresearch.org
December 19, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Trump-hating adoptee here. Let’s fight racist immigration policies without defending international adoption, which is rife with trafficking, coercion, baby stealing, deception, corruption—and white saviorism.
Also, bc of these scandals it barely exists anymore.
www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/...
Also, bc of these scandals it barely exists anymore.
www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/...
AND. A lot of folks on the blue side of the aisle think they are the good guys with their thoughts on intercountry adoption. And adoption in general.
And, as an adoptee, lemme hold your hand while I say this:
🗣️🗣️🗣️ you are NOT.
And, as an adoptee, lemme hold your hand while I say this:
🗣️🗣️🗣️ you are NOT.
December 19, 2025 at 3:22 PM
AND. A lot of folks on the blue side of the aisle think they are the good guys with their thoughts on intercountry adoption. And adoption in general.
And, as an adoptee, lemme hold your hand while I say this:
🗣️🗣️🗣️ you are NOT.
And, as an adoptee, lemme hold your hand while I say this:
🗣️🗣️🗣️ you are NOT.
As an International adoptee, not particularly sad. It's an irony that I hate the racism, but if it was permanent, it would be better. There are better systems that plenary adoption. BTW, I also have a BA in Anthropology I concentrated in systems. I 100% can explain in social justice terms.
December 19, 2025 at 1:10 PM
As an International adoptee, not particularly sad. It's an irony that I hate the racism, but if it was permanent, it would be better. There are better systems that plenary adoption. BTW, I also have a BA in Anthropology I concentrated in systems. I 100% can explain in social justice terms.
i love stumbling upon niche community drama on tiktok like why am i a non-adoptee watching a bunch of adoptees fight over whether its okay to seek out ur bio parents in a closed adoption
December 19, 2025 at 3:22 AM
i love stumbling upon niche community drama on tiktok like why am i a non-adoptee watching a bunch of adoptees fight over whether its okay to seek out ur bio parents in a closed adoption
If you advocated for guardianship and I missed it, I’m sorry. What I’ve seen is heavy support for adoption, which I highly disagree with, as an adoptee. I may have missed some skeets.
December 18, 2025 at 11:34 PM
If you advocated for guardianship and I missed it, I’m sorry. What I’ve seen is heavy support for adoption, which I highly disagree with, as an adoptee. I may have missed some skeets.
There are many adult adoptees working on these issues who can answer this question better than I.
You've talked down to some of them are on this thread. Also @adopteerights.bsky.social and Adoptee Voices Rising (not on bsky). Adoption laws vary by state, so look for adoptee groups near you too.
You've talked down to some of them are on this thread. Also @adopteerights.bsky.social and Adoptee Voices Rising (not on bsky). Adoption laws vary by state, so look for adoptee groups near you too.
December 18, 2025 at 7:59 PM
There are many adult adoptees working on these issues who can answer this question better than I.
You've talked down to some of them are on this thread. Also @adopteerights.bsky.social and Adoptee Voices Rising (not on bsky). Adoption laws vary by state, so look for adoptee groups near you too.
You've talked down to some of them are on this thread. Also @adopteerights.bsky.social and Adoptee Voices Rising (not on bsky). Adoption laws vary by state, so look for adoptee groups near you too.
You really are something else :D
You're saying a late discovery adoptee in the west doesn't know a thing about western tropes about adoption, really?
You're saying a late discovery adoptee in the west doesn't know a thing about western tropes about adoption, really?
December 18, 2025 at 7:22 PM
You really are something else :D
You're saying a late discovery adoptee in the west doesn't know a thing about western tropes about adoption, really?
You're saying a late discovery adoptee in the west doesn't know a thing about western tropes about adoption, really?
You came onto my post when I'm an adoptee, didn't read my profile, and then got upset when I knew my stuff. Know your opponent. I didn't change my profile. You could have looked. Maybe the person who posts regularly about writing, writing theory, comparative lit and adoption is a bad opponent.
December 18, 2025 at 7:11 PM
You came onto my post when I'm an adoptee, didn't read my profile, and then got upset when I knew my stuff. Know your opponent. I didn't change my profile. You could have looked. Maybe the person who posts regularly about writing, writing theory, comparative lit and adoption is a bad opponent.
I should probably finish embroidering the overalls I started on oh, six months ago? Did your adopters foster your talents, even if they did not align with àny of their own interests? #adoption #adopted #adoptee #art #temperamemt #alignment #bestinterests #child #substitutecaregivers
December 18, 2025 at 6:34 PM
I should probably finish embroidering the overalls I started on oh, six months ago? Did your adopters foster your talents, even if they did not align with àny of their own interests? #adoption #adopted #adoptee #art #temperamemt #alignment #bestinterests #child #substitutecaregivers
Vast majority of adoptees had the same childhood their non-adopted peers did. The myth of the "disgruntled adoptee who had a bad experience" is just adoption agency propaganda, invented for marketing purposes. Adoption is a huge, money making business after all. 🥚
December 18, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Vast majority of adoptees had the same childhood their non-adopted peers did. The myth of the "disgruntled adoptee who had a bad experience" is just adoption agency propaganda, invented for marketing purposes. Adoption is a huge, money making business after all. 🥚
I grew up hearing Children should be seen ànd not heard. Who knew that, as an adoptee, I am part of a group perpetually infantilized? One society would prefer be seen but stay silent? #adoption #adopted #marginalization #silence #exploitation #coercion #truth #family #bestinterests #memtalhealth
December 18, 2025 at 3:12 PM
I grew up hearing Children should be seen ànd not heard. Who knew that, as an adoptee, I am part of a group perpetually infantilized? One society would prefer be seen but stay silent? #adoption #adopted #marginalization #silence #exploitation #coercion #truth #family #bestinterests #memtalhealth
Also why are you applying one secondhand anecdotal adoption outcome as justification for the system as a whole? Did you not spend the day arguing that the lived experiences of the *entire* Bluesky adoptee community is not representative of adoption?? slow clap 👏 👏 👏
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December 18, 2025 at 6:52 AM
Also why are you applying one secondhand anecdotal adoption outcome as justification for the system as a whole? Did you not spend the day arguing that the lived experiences of the *entire* Bluesky adoptee community is not representative of adoption?? slow clap 👏 👏 👏
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I missed responding to this ̵cringe potato. Heaven forbid we prioritize stopping human trafficking over their need to purchase someone else's child. What a day to be an adoptee! 🥚
December 18, 2025 at 6:29 AM
I missed responding to this ̵cringe potato. Heaven forbid we prioritize stopping human trafficking over their need to purchase someone else's child. What a day to be an adoptee! 🥚
I am an adoptee, my lived experience being a textbook example of "best outcomes", who adamantly opposes plenary adoption. 🥚
Adoption is human trafficking.
Adoption is human trafficking.
December 18, 2025 at 12:04 AM
I am an adoptee, my lived experience being a textbook example of "best outcomes", who adamantly opposes plenary adoption. 🥚
Adoption is human trafficking.
Adoption is human trafficking.
It demonstates how many of these hurtful comments you made that we hear, constantly. It's not a game. It's a reminder that we had to endure ignorance, arrogance and mansplaining once again. You're not adopted. Don't explain adoption to an adoptee. It's that simple.
December 17, 2025 at 10:08 PM
It demonstates how many of these hurtful comments you made that we hear, constantly. It's not a game. It's a reminder that we had to endure ignorance, arrogance and mansplaining once again. You're not adopted. Don't explain adoption to an adoptee. It's that simple.
Yes and adoptees calling for adoption abolition makes you incredibly defensive and leads you to pathologize us, we've noticed- you've been more clear than you meant to be.
Is that a threat? "Quiet, adoptee"?
Better folks than you have tried.
Is that a threat? "Quiet, adoptee"?
Better folks than you have tried.
December 17, 2025 at 9:59 PM
Yes and adoptees calling for adoption abolition makes you incredibly defensive and leads you to pathologize us, we've noticed- you've been more clear than you meant to be.
Is that a threat? "Quiet, adoptee"?
Better folks than you have tried.
Is that a threat? "Quiet, adoptee"?
Better folks than you have tried.
We're also telling you that the good outcomes you refer to are fantasy. For the many reasons all here shared with you today. So again, another example of making bad faith arguments. Take a look at the bingo card. How many of those did you use today? Please educate yourself.
December 17, 2025 at 9:48 PM
We're also telling you that the good outcomes you refer to are fantasy. For the many reasons all here shared with you today. So again, another example of making bad faith arguments. Take a look at the bingo card. How many of those did you use today? Please educate yourself.
Domestic demand for babies drives US adoption policy in ways most don't realize. I discussed this on Al Jazeera's baby boxes episode. When we treat babies as commodities, we lose sight of what adoption should be about. 🥚Full episode link in bio. #AdoptionReform #AdopteeVoices #adoptee #adoption
December 17, 2025 at 9:16 PM
Domestic demand for babies drives US adoption policy in ways most don't realize. I discussed this on Al Jazeera's baby boxes episode. When we treat babies as commodities, we lose sight of what adoption should be about. 🥚Full episode link in bio. #AdoptionReform #AdopteeVoices #adoptee #adoption
Its wild how no one wants to listen to what adult adoptees and adoptee researchers, adoptee therapists, adoptee advocates have to say about adoption and instead think they are authorities on a subject because they have an adopted cousin or watched an Oprah reunion.
December 17, 2025 at 7:24 PM
Its wild how no one wants to listen to what adult adoptees and adoptee researchers, adoptee therapists, adoptee advocates have to say about adoption and instead think they are authorities on a subject because they have an adopted cousin or watched an Oprah reunion.
Even domestic adoption done by the book in the US can be intensely traumatizing to the adoptee. The standard closed adoption still cuts the child off from their original family. That trauma gets multiplied when the child is taken away from their home country as well.
December 17, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Even domestic adoption done by the book in the US can be intensely traumatizing to the adoptee. The standard closed adoption still cuts the child off from their original family. That trauma gets multiplied when the child is taken away from their home country as well.
I can tell you,as a queer adoptee, that adoption as it’s practiced is about cis heteronormativity first. Has always been. It’s about deciding who gets to parent and who is undesirable. As a queer person you have more in common w adoptees than adopters I promise you. Listen to us.
December 17, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I can tell you,as a queer adoptee, that adoption as it’s practiced is about cis heteronormativity first. Has always been. It’s about deciding who gets to parent and who is undesirable. As a queer person you have more in common w adoptees than adopters I promise you. Listen to us.
What do you think we're talking about? What imaginary system of adoption allows the adoptee to retain their identity, access to their kin and medical history and gives them the option to annul it as an adult? That's so far from the system that exists now. It's not "small" changes that are needed.
December 17, 2025 at 6:15 PM
What do you think we're talking about? What imaginary system of adoption allows the adoptee to retain their identity, access to their kin and medical history and gives them the option to annul it as an adult? That's so far from the system that exists now. It's not "small" changes that are needed.
Ask not for whom the adoption is open, it's not open for the adoptee.
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“adoptions are open now”
the thing is, even with “open” adoptions (typically non-enforceable agreements to permit contact), the birthparent has no more of a right by law to know the whereabouts of their child than does any other total (legal) stranger. 🥚
the thing is, even with “open” adoptions (typically non-enforceable agreements to permit contact), the birthparent has no more of a right by law to know the whereabouts of their child than does any other total (legal) stranger. 🥚
from Ann Fessler’s The Girls Who Went Away 🥚
December 17, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Ask not for whom the adoption is open, it's not open for the adoptee.
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