Had a dream that I was watching a re-airing of a TV special, "A Christmas Eve Eve Farewell to Boris Yeltsin Featuring His Favorite Song, Copacabana"
July 26, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Had a dream that I was watching a re-airing of a TV special, "A Christmas Eve Eve Farewell to Boris Yeltsin Featuring His Favorite Song, Copacabana"
Google Maps is crazy thinking I know how far "800 feet" is
July 16, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Google Maps is crazy thinking I know how far "800 feet" is
Like they say about the Olympics, I think it also would be helpful to see some normal people try to land a 737 so I can appreciate how hard it is to do it well
June 26, 2025 at 4:59 AM
Like they say about the Olympics, I think it also would be helpful to see some normal people try to land a 737 so I can appreciate how hard it is to do it well
A sign said the south TSA checkpoint had a 5 minute wait and the north TSA checkpoint had a 10 minute wait, so I went to the south one...and then I walked an extra 15 minutes through the terminal because my gate turned out to be literally the closest gate to the north TSA checkpoint
June 11, 2025 at 9:31 PM
A sign said the south TSA checkpoint had a 5 minute wait and the north TSA checkpoint had a 10 minute wait, so I went to the south one...and then I walked an extra 15 minutes through the terminal because my gate turned out to be literally the closest gate to the north TSA checkpoint
New York Times: "Short people got no reason to live"
May 25, 2025 at 6:54 PM
New York Times: "Short people got no reason to live"
I decided to buy a mug that no one else would want to use
May 25, 2025 at 6:44 PM
I decided to buy a mug that no one else would want to use
Pope Francis isn't dead, y'all; it just sounds like that from the way the headline is phrased
April 21, 2025 at 2:45 PM
Pope Francis isn't dead, y'all; it just sounds like that from the way the headline is phrased
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
What the fuck I just saw a triangle in real life I thought that was just some theoretical math shit in books
March 10, 2025 at 2:53 AM
What the fuck I just saw a triangle in real life I thought that was just some theoretical math shit in books
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
what idiot called him a somnambulist clown with a foot fetish and not honk shoo
March 7, 2025 at 10:11 PM
what idiot called him a somnambulist clown with a foot fetish and not honk shoo
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
guy in the 1920s putting a "i bought this before he went crazy" sticker on his Model T
March 5, 2025 at 4:26 PM
guy in the 1920s putting a "i bought this before he went crazy" sticker on his Model T
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
Deep Vein Trombonesis is a pretty good name for a ska band.
February 21, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Deep Vein Trombonesis is a pretty good name for a ska band.
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
(taking a wrong turn and ending up in the Daytona 500)
No one's letting me merge
No one's letting me merge
February 17, 2025 at 2:06 AM
(taking a wrong turn and ending up in the Daytona 500)
No one's letting me merge
No one's letting me merge
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
Just saw THE new paddington movie, what is the BEst pARt.. I will DIvulge no spoilErS.
February 12, 2025 at 4:44 PM
Just saw THE new paddington movie, what is the BEst pARt.. I will DIvulge no spoilErS.
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
[IKEA-themed restaurant]
Maître-d: is your table ready yet?
Maître-d: is your table ready yet?
February 12, 2025 at 5:29 PM
[IKEA-themed restaurant]
Maître-d: is your table ready yet?
Maître-d: is your table ready yet?
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
When you finish varnishing the castle gate and see a battering ram crest yonder hill
February 5, 2025 at 9:56 PM
When you finish varnishing the castle gate and see a battering ram crest yonder hill
When I open a bag of Fritos, I wonder if my dog thinks, "OMG HE'S EATING FEET"
February 3, 2025 at 4:40 AM
When I open a bag of Fritos, I wonder if my dog thinks, "OMG HE'S EATING FEET"
Nothing more insulting than when I sit next to the air purifier and it kicks into high gear
January 28, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Nothing more insulting than when I sit next to the air purifier and it kicks into high gear
New euphemism for masturbation just dropped
January 24, 2025 at 8:39 PM
New euphemism for masturbation just dropped
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
dude last night we arrived at the USPS Regional Destination Facility at like 2:04 a.m. and then at like 5:47 a.m.we departed the USPS Regional Destination Facility and started Moving Through the Network it was crazy
January 23, 2025 at 7:45 PM
dude last night we arrived at the USPS Regional Destination Facility at like 2:04 a.m. and then at like 5:47 a.m.we departed the USPS Regional Destination Facility and started Moving Through the Network it was crazy
What if barking is actually like laughing but we just don't get their humor
January 24, 2025 at 1:54 AM
What if barking is actually like laughing but we just don't get their humor
I am once again asking if we can pretend "Bluesky" rhymes with "brewski"
January 22, 2025 at 5:27 PM
I am once again asking if we can pretend "Bluesky" rhymes with "brewski"
Reposted by David Jordan Nestor
lmao no, TikTok users are not moving to Bluesky. They would literally rather learn Mandarin than learn how to read a feed of text posts. This is a millennial retirement home.
January 19, 2025 at 5:45 AM
lmao no, TikTok users are not moving to Bluesky. They would literally rather learn Mandarin than learn how to read a feed of text posts. This is a millennial retirement home.
"Please remove any face coverings before donning a gas mask" is a new flight safety instruction that is probably related to an idiot
December 28, 2024 at 3:12 AM
"Please remove any face coverings before donning a gas mask" is a new flight safety instruction that is probably related to an idiot
Cowards! Let us sing in the movie theater!
November 22, 2024 at 11:16 PM
Cowards! Let us sing in the movie theater!
This would be $2k a month in L.A.
November 13, 2024 at 6:21 PM
This would be $2k a month in L.A.