Splats
@splats.bsky.social
Impervious to all forms of man management
Traditional Saint Patrick's day breakfast ☘️🐍
March 17, 2025 at 8:52 AM
Traditional Saint Patrick's day breakfast ☘️🐍
I need some sort of cosy bed on a remote control scissor-lift for my elderly cat so he can sit alongside me at my desk, or anywhere he pleases. After his recent stroke trauma he's too wobbly for jumping. #OverEngineeringPickingHimUp
January 8, 2025 at 5:12 AM
I need some sort of cosy bed on a remote control scissor-lift for my elderly cat so he can sit alongside me at my desk, or anywhere he pleases. After his recent stroke trauma he's too wobbly for jumping. #OverEngineeringPickingHimUp
Reposted by Splats
should I get my own personal Jesus, or should we just get a Jesus for the table?
January 5, 2025 at 3:46 AM
should I get my own personal Jesus, or should we just get a Jesus for the table?
Reposted by Splats
Dry Jan is what I call your mum
January 1, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Dry Jan is what I call your mum
DM me if you want to bid on this expensive modelling clay
January 3, 2025 at 10:38 AM
DM me if you want to bid on this expensive modelling clay
Makes sense. Penny farthing stunt riders probably do have stiff Victorian shoes that would benefit from a travel shoehorn 🤔
December 30, 2024 at 9:03 PM
Makes sense. Penny farthing stunt riders probably do have stiff Victorian shoes that would benefit from a travel shoehorn 🤔
Reposted by Splats
Look at this horrible Chichester drug man. Bold as brass, in a street where kids play. Disgustnig.
December 26, 2024 at 12:43 PM
Look at this horrible Chichester drug man. Bold as brass, in a street where kids play. Disgustnig.
Reposted by Splats
Reposted by Splats
I'm practicing mindfulness. Jesus it's stressful
December 23, 2024 at 7:31 AM
I'm practicing mindfulness. Jesus it's stressful
Mateta, more like Snoteta. Twice the camera has caught him emptying his nostrils.
Put me right off my pitta and guacamole 🤢
Put me right off my pitta and guacamole 🤢
December 21, 2024 at 5:56 PM
Mateta, more like Snoteta. Twice the camera has caught him emptying his nostrils.
Put me right off my pitta and guacamole 🤢
Put me right off my pitta and guacamole 🤢
Reposted by Splats
December 19, 2024 at 7:37 PM
Just caught something on TV called Professional Padel. Thought it was ai generated slop. Turns out it's just a weird sport and it really looks and plays like that. 🫠🎾
December 20, 2024 at 5:50 PM
Just caught something on TV called Professional Padel. Thought it was ai generated slop. Turns out it's just a weird sport and it really looks and plays like that. 🫠🎾
Reposted by Splats
YAS Mr Trombone Man give us EVERYTHING!
December 20, 2024 at 6:00 AM
YAS Mr Trombone Man give us EVERYTHING!
Reposted by Splats
It appears to be the 10th anniversary of these Irish chaps going out on a pub crawl in fancy dress.
December 20, 2024 at 6:48 AM
It appears to be the 10th anniversary of these Irish chaps going out on a pub crawl in fancy dress.
Reposted by Splats
sure, everybody hates snake oil — until their snake starts squeaking
December 15, 2024 at 1:04 PM
sure, everybody hates snake oil — until their snake starts squeaking
Reposted by Splats
Going home early because of "wet sleeve"
December 16, 2024 at 8:14 PM
Going home early because of "wet sleeve"
Ever since one of you smartarses said meal-deal sandwiches only 'taste of fridge' I can't unthink it when reaching for one and then changing my mind. ❄️🥪
December 15, 2024 at 9:03 PM
Ever since one of you smartarses said meal-deal sandwiches only 'taste of fridge' I can't unthink it when reaching for one and then changing my mind. ❄️🥪
Reposted by Splats
Finally watching Wolf Hall. In deep now. Becoming low-key obsessed with the sets. Scanning the walls and skirting boards for light switches and plug sockets. A rogue Sportsdirect mug. Copy of AutoTrader accidentally left on a trellis.
December 11, 2024 at 11:35 PM
Finally watching Wolf Hall. In deep now. Becoming low-key obsessed with the sets. Scanning the walls and skirting boards for light switches and plug sockets. A rogue Sportsdirect mug. Copy of AutoTrader accidentally left on a trellis.
Reposted by Splats
Reposted by Splats
December 12, 2024 at 8:45 AM
Reposted by Splats
Happy Christmas Jumper Day
December 12, 2024 at 11:55 AM
Happy Christmas Jumper Day
Reposted by Splats
*forgets to bring phone into the bathroom* i’m off the grid
December 12, 2024 at 1:14 AM
*forgets to bring phone into the bathroom* i’m off the grid