Reposted
Me: Hey can you do your dishes
My roommate The Buddha: Perhaps your problem is not my dishes but your attachment to a clean sink
Me: Alright man
My roommate The Buddha: Perhaps your problem is not my dishes but your attachment to a clean sink
Me: Alright man
December 6, 2024 at 2:40 AM
Me: Hey can you do your dishes
My roommate The Buddha: Perhaps your problem is not my dishes but your attachment to a clean sink
Me: Alright man
My roommate The Buddha: Perhaps your problem is not my dishes but your attachment to a clean sink
Me: Alright man
Reposted
the CEO shooter had three D words written on the bullets he shot. D, D, D... a sly reference to Carlos Mencia's iconic catchphrase
December 6, 2024 at 7:45 PM
the CEO shooter had three D words written on the bullets he shot. D, D, D... a sly reference to Carlos Mencia's iconic catchphrase
had a dream that i owned a shitty 2000s comedy on dvd with lots of big stars, but the selling point was that it was only 46 minutes long and there was a big banner on the front of the dvd that said “just over 30 minutes!!”
December 6, 2024 at 4:06 PM
had a dream that i owned a shitty 2000s comedy on dvd with lots of big stars, but the selling point was that it was only 46 minutes long and there was a big banner on the front of the dvd that said “just over 30 minutes!!”
Reposted
DOOF TRAM
December 5, 2024 at 1:57 PM
DOOF TRAM
Reposted
Reposted
post this on your profile today to make sure federal agents know that everything you posted today was just jokes
December 5, 2024 at 3:35 AM
post this on your profile today to make sure federal agents know that everything you posted today was just jokes
Reposted
oh my god see you guys later i’m about to be rich
December 5, 2024 at 2:05 AM
oh my god see you guys later i’m about to be rich
Reposted
FRANK SINATRA: Alright listen up boys we're gonna rob five casinos
DEAN MARTIN: Ring a ding ding baby ha ha
RED SKELETON: I've got a BONE to pick with you, Danny Ocean! NYEHEHEHEH
DEAN MARTIN: Ring a ding ding baby ha ha
RED SKELETON: I've got a BONE to pick with you, Danny Ocean! NYEHEHEHEH
December 4, 2024 at 11:05 PM
FRANK SINATRA: Alright listen up boys we're gonna rob five casinos
DEAN MARTIN: Ring a ding ding baby ha ha
RED SKELETON: I've got a BONE to pick with you, Danny Ocean! NYEHEHEHEH
DEAN MARTIN: Ring a ding ding baby ha ha
RED SKELETON: I've got a BONE to pick with you, Danny Ocean! NYEHEHEHEH
Reposted
In 40 years hawk tuah will be the leader of New United States
December 4, 2024 at 11:04 PM
In 40 years hawk tuah will be the leader of New United States
Reposted
Good news for the CEO of UnitedHealthcare: there are no concerns about preexisting conditions in hell
December 4, 2024 at 4:55 PM
Good news for the CEO of UnitedHealthcare: there are no concerns about preexisting conditions in hell
i hate to be one of those “i was born in the wrong generation” guys, but sometimes. SOMETIMES!
December 4, 2024 at 3:06 AM
i hate to be one of those “i was born in the wrong generation” guys, but sometimes. SOMETIMES!
Reposted
This has made me smile more times than almost anything else on the internet
December 3, 2024 at 9:36 PM
This has made me smile more times than almost anything else on the internet
Reposted
just had an idea
December 3, 2024 at 11:30 PM
just had an idea
Reposted
tradwife, in the sense that she chases me around with a rolling pin
December 3, 2024 at 9:46 PM
tradwife, in the sense that she chases me around with a rolling pin
shoutout to palcord because this is like twitter but now people can actually see my tweets and like them out of pity
December 3, 2024 at 6:00 AM
shoutout to palcord because this is like twitter but now people can actually see my tweets and like them out of pity
the radio was the greatest invention i don’t think we needed to progress past that
December 3, 2024 at 5:57 AM
the radio was the greatest invention i don’t think we needed to progress past that
they did not go out but tomorrow after work, hoo baby get ready
if my partner goes out tonight, i’m gonna get drunk and attempt to record songs on the four track
December 3, 2024 at 5:57 AM
they did not go out but tomorrow after work, hoo baby get ready
thinking about how cool the radio is
December 3, 2024 at 5:56 AM
thinking about how cool the radio is