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goosebass.bsky.social
Goose
@goosebass.bsky.social
I’m here to bring the funk and a good attitude. bass player for Brozie O’Donnell, formerly of Benchmarks, blog boy at Pats Pulpit, Wall of Weiners Champion at Cori’s Doghouse
Pinned
*massive vape rip* Drake Maye is who Trevor Lawrence was supposed to be and JJ McCarthy is who everyone fretting about Drake’s footwork and mechanics thought he would be
Shit. I just realized I did the greater/less than sign here backwards. It’s supposed to say Drake is 1 of only 2 QBs who loses *less than* 5 yards per sack (on average, of course)

Don’t tweet before you finish your coffee, kids
IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS with the stat that while Drake Maye does indeed have the 3rd-most sacks in the NFL, he is 1 of only 2 QBs who loses > 5 yards per sack
December 3, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Reposted by Goose
He should challenge her to take a televised quiz on the Constitution with him, so he can show he knows more about it.

They could each take the cognitive test too, and show who can identify the most zoo animals.
Trump: "It’s a hellhole right now. And those Somalians should be out of here. They've destroyed our country. And all they do is complain, complain, complain. You have her. She’s always talking about the Constitution provides me with – go back to your own country and figure out your constitution."
December 3, 2025 at 9:38 PM
I really hope he keeps fucking this chicken and we get more Trump Explains How Life Works gems like during Covid when he said you show your ID to buy groceries and they put them on your tab
Trump: It's a con job. I think affordability is the greatest con job
December 3, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Haha well I nailed 3 out of 5, not quite as high as Drake Maye’s completion percentage but I’ll take it.

The Dirty Nil is the best rock band that no one knows about
December 3, 2025 at 7:17 PM
They’re calling it the end of an era, for the first time in a decade Goose’s Top 5 includes neither Hatebreed OR Carly Rae Jepsen
December 3, 2025 at 6:56 PM
Reposted by Goose
If that happens they should just shut the whole operation down.
I still can’t shake the feeling that they’re gonna deny Bill so he doesn’t have the First Ballot Hall Of Famer cred because reasons
Bill Belichick, Robert Kraft are finalists for the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
www.nbcsports.com/nfl/profootb...
December 3, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Pats offensive line only allowed a 25% pressure rate against the New York Football Giants with 2 backups playing 100% of the snaps on the left side and a center with a tummyache
December 3, 2025 at 6:30 PM
I still can’t shake the feeling that they’re gonna deny Bill so he doesn’t have the First Ballot Hall Of Famer cred because reasons
December 3, 2025 at 5:45 PM
I’m going to be sick. This Van Epps bozo probably still has cum on his chin this morning
December 3, 2025 at 4:26 PM
IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS with the stat that while Drake Maye does indeed have the 3rd-most sacks in the NFL, he is 1 of only 2 QBs who loses > 5 yards per sack
December 3, 2025 at 3:30 PM
December 3, 2025 at 5:40 AM
I’m glad Alec came right out and said it cause we were all thinking it
December 2, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Just for funsies, since an easy schedule is apparently a cheat code for the Patriots winning lots of football games, I took a peek at every other team playing a last-place schedule this year.

They are a combined 28-58 and 5 of the 7 of them are last in their division, again
December 2, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Reposted by Goose
Dude spent all night on social media only to fall asleep in front of the nation while nodding his head to crimes against humanity.
Those videos of Donald Trump dozing off during his cabinet meeting are really something
December 2, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Shepherds pie quite possibly the ideal winter food
December 2, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Every week when I send out my little performance reports it still makes me laugh that the only way to consistently get a response from the C-suite is writing the email with lots of pictures
December 2, 2025 at 6:37 PM
I’m having a bit of a hard time buying that some of you are legitimately bent out of shape about the Stranger Things kids when every movie we grew up with like Clueless and She’s All That, every high school actor is like, 28
December 2, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Great job AI, crushing it with answering basic questions as always
December 2, 2025 at 4:11 PM
Reposted by Goose
This is the crux of the bargain white ppl made voting for trump & the gop. "Rid us of brown ppl & make white ppl the majority again & we will sacrifice our jobs, savings, homes, and even children." They 💯 factored in those losses & decided it was worth it. That's why nothing else he does matters
December 1, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Haha incredible answer from Jaxson Dart on whether Christian Elliss hit him dirty or not. Dart has my respect
December 2, 2025 at 3:03 PM
Shoutout to the gang out early for the morning commute bundled up in the 32° weather in Bellevue rocking the @aftynbehn.bsky.social signs. The game day energy is real
December 2, 2025 at 2:33 PM
We’re on to the latest bye in the history of mankind
December 2, 2025 at 4:08 AM
Patriots Cannibal Corpse
🤝
Make Them Suffer
December 2, 2025 at 2:26 AM
For me, it’s Malevolence. Just an absolute riff kegger from start to finish
December 1, 2025 at 11:03 PM