did you see the stuff online. it’s crazy

him: (looking at my scars) wow, how did you get those?
me: (knowing they’re from my cat scratching me) war

i am declaring partial law!!! (only following the fun laws)

What kind of crimes do cats commit?

Felineys!

James Bond movies never show the part where the supervillain collects government subsidies to build his death tech.

Actually, in France male athletes wear jacquestraps to protect their oui ouis