michael lutz
@ztul.bsky.social
"warrenisdead". he/him. boston-ish. phd thinking about media and making podcasts for @rangedtouch.bsky.social. writer and narrative designer. Project C for @halfmermaid.co inquiries: j.michael.lutz at gmail
Pinned
michael lutz
@ztul.bsky.social
· Oct 17
whether my followers got here from the Dumb Horseshit starter pack, the Annoying Assholes starter pack, the Waste of Time starter pack, the Dogturd Face starter pack, the No Cussing (Non-Christian) starter pack, or the Following Mainly To See When He Dies starter pack, i hope you have a good time!!!
gotta remember that "Gilligan shows" means something different these days
January 12, 2026 at 8:27 PM
gotta remember that "Gilligan shows" means something different these days
Stephen King wrote a sequel to what I think might be my favorite book by him, and despite some flaws and what this clip may suggest, it is so singularly weird, out-of-left-field and HONEST from him as an answer to "what happens to that kid after The Shining?" that I still really like it
Nomadic boomer vampires rule the country this month on JUST KING THINGS! We talk Stephen King's 2013 sequel to The Shining, DOCTOR SLEEP, a compelling return to themes of addiction, recovery, and family within the narrative arc of an extremely weird X-Men comic. rangedtouch.com/2026/01/12/d...
January 12, 2026 at 6:03 PM
Stephen King wrote a sequel to what I think might be my favorite book by him, and despite some flaws and what this clip may suggest, it is so singularly weird, out-of-left-field and HONEST from him as an answer to "what happens to that kid after The Shining?" that I still really like it
Reposted by michael lutz
Killed a bird beloved of the gods on the heaven fructified field of flowers, honestly this was on me bc before I loosed my arrow I noticed the bird was wearing some really expensive shit (hat, boots, etc) that most birds don’t usually wear.
Without revealing your actual age, what's an oath you've broken that rendered you temporarily mortal?
January 12, 2026 at 5:44 AM
Killed a bird beloved of the gods on the heaven fructified field of flowers, honestly this was on me bc before I loosed my arrow I noticed the bird was wearing some really expensive shit (hat, boots, etc) that most birds don’t usually wear.
Reposted by michael lutz
If you support RANGED TOUCH on Patreon, you'll all sorts of Bonus Episodes, such as this month's discussion of Mike Flanagan's ambitious 2019 double-cinematic sequel adaptation of DOCTOR SLEEP, which at least one of us thinks is actually better than the book! www.patreon.com/posts/just-k...
January 12, 2026 at 3:37 PM
If you support RANGED TOUCH on Patreon, you'll all sorts of Bonus Episodes, such as this month's discussion of Mike Flanagan's ambitious 2019 double-cinematic sequel adaptation of DOCTOR SLEEP, which at least one of us thinks is actually better than the book! www.patreon.com/posts/just-k...
Reposted by michael lutz
unc won't stop alluding to the absurd adventures of his mysterious journey
January 11, 2026 at 10:40 PM
unc won't stop alluding to the absurd adventures of his mysterious journey
Reposted by michael lutz
Nomadic boomer vampires rule the country this month on JUST KING THINGS! We talk Stephen King's 2013 sequel to The Shining, DOCTOR SLEEP, a compelling return to themes of addiction, recovery, and family within the narrative arc of an extremely weird X-Men comic. rangedtouch.com/2026/01/12/d...
January 12, 2026 at 2:59 PM
Nomadic boomer vampires rule the country this month on JUST KING THINGS! We talk Stephen King's 2013 sequel to The Shining, DOCTOR SLEEP, a compelling return to themes of addiction, recovery, and family within the narrative arc of an extremely weird X-Men comic. rangedtouch.com/2026/01/12/d...
Reposted by michael lutz
british tv show names: call upon the carpenter
american tv show names: dicksucker: legacy
american tv show names: dicksucker: legacy
January 12, 2026 at 3:18 AM
british tv show names: call upon the carpenter
american tv show names: dicksucker: legacy
american tv show names: dicksucker: legacy
Reposted by michael lutz
hi, political philosopher here! this is not funny, central banks only do this when they're in extreme distress
Video message from Federal Reserve Chair Jerome H. Powell:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KckG...
www.federalreserve.gov/newsevents/s...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KckG...
www.federalreserve.gov/newsevents/s...
Statement by Federal Reserve Chair Jerome H. Powell
YouTube video by Federal Reserve
www.youtube.com
January 12, 2026 at 1:04 AM
hi, political philosopher here! this is not funny, central banks only do this when they're in extreme distress
ME POSTING: umm does anyone have the medicine for Genius Disorder ☝️🤨
YOU: amazing. A bigtime textposter. He lives like a king
ME LIVING: forget the cheese, the farmer's wife is coming! Your cleverness at springing her traps is useless to us dead. don't make this about what the cat did to your father
YOU: amazing. A bigtime textposter. He lives like a king
ME LIVING: forget the cheese, the farmer's wife is coming! Your cleverness at springing her traps is useless to us dead. don't make this about what the cat did to your father
January 11, 2026 at 10:10 PM
ME POSTING: umm does anyone have the medicine for Genius Disorder ☝️🤨
YOU: amazing. A bigtime textposter. He lives like a king
ME LIVING: forget the cheese, the farmer's wife is coming! Your cleverness at springing her traps is useless to us dead. don't make this about what the cat did to your father
YOU: amazing. A bigtime textposter. He lives like a king
ME LIVING: forget the cheese, the farmer's wife is coming! Your cleverness at springing her traps is useless to us dead. don't make this about what the cat did to your father
For Christmas, the child received the Eurodance crab, a mechanical crab that runs back and forth while playing two alternating 30-second clips of two different Eurodance songs of very opposite moods
January 11, 2026 at 8:52 PM
For Christmas, the child received the Eurodance crab, a mechanical crab that runs back and forth while playing two alternating 30-second clips of two different Eurodance songs of very opposite moods
just saw someone quote-posting a news story with a "buried lede" addendum and the thing they were alleging was a buried lede was literally the headline of the story they were quote-posting, and based on context i am going to say this person was not doing a bit
January 11, 2026 at 7:33 PM
just saw someone quote-posting a news story with a "buried lede" addendum and the thing they were alleging was a buried lede was literally the headline of the story they were quote-posting, and based on context i am going to say this person was not doing a bit
Reposted by michael lutz
This lady is happy with her choice! She loves her option!
January 11, 2026 at 4:36 PM
This lady is happy with her choice! She loves her option!
Listen up honey dears: Simulations by scientists show a rapid increase in supersessionary brane extensa as we near the Universal Equinox. With perseverance You re in the perfect position to shift realities to a world where #TheCureIsWater #ThisWorld #WelcomeHome
January 11, 2026 at 3:33 AM
Listen up honey dears: Simulations by scientists show a rapid increase in supersessionary brane extensa as we near the Universal Equinox. With perseverance You re in the perfect position to shift realities to a world where #TheCureIsWater #ThisWorld #WelcomeHome
Reposted by michael lutz
The rest of the Farmhouse Mystery Kids held on for dear life as Football Casey wove the speeding RV through the strange obsidian spires that littered Route 666. "I hope Grandpa got good insurance for this thing!" groaned Teddy. Behind them, Evil Evan Everley drew closer in his biomechanical go-kart.
June 4, 2025 at 3:57 AM
The rest of the Farmhouse Mystery Kids held on for dear life as Football Casey wove the speeding RV through the strange obsidian spires that littered Route 666. "I hope Grandpa got good insurance for this thing!" groaned Teddy. Behind them, Evil Evan Everley drew closer in his biomechanical go-kart.
Reposted by michael lutz
LITTLE LOTTIE: Baby Yum-yum, stop horsing around on that conveyor belt!
BABY YUM-YUM: Bwee!
TINA: Ugh, I might hurl! What's that gnarly smell?
GIZMO: Cold storage, I wager. Farmer Flenser's Automated Abattoir hasn't had electricity for over a week.
[Lights suddenly flicker on; motors purr to life.]
BABY YUM-YUM: Bwee!
TINA: Ugh, I might hurl! What's that gnarly smell?
GIZMO: Cold storage, I wager. Farmer Flenser's Automated Abattoir hasn't had electricity for over a week.
[Lights suddenly flicker on; motors purr to life.]
February 14, 2025 at 1:07 AM
LITTLE LOTTIE: Baby Yum-yum, stop horsing around on that conveyor belt!
BABY YUM-YUM: Bwee!
TINA: Ugh, I might hurl! What's that gnarly smell?
GIZMO: Cold storage, I wager. Farmer Flenser's Automated Abattoir hasn't had electricity for over a week.
[Lights suddenly flicker on; motors purr to life.]
BABY YUM-YUM: Bwee!
TINA: Ugh, I might hurl! What's that gnarly smell?
GIZMO: Cold storage, I wager. Farmer Flenser's Automated Abattoir hasn't had electricity for over a week.
[Lights suddenly flicker on; motors purr to life.]
a wuss!" snarled Football Casey.
Teddy blinked. The other Farmhouse Mystery Kids went quiet. Even at their most rambunctious, such language was never used among them.
"Dude," scoffed Tina, "I don't care how rad you are at football now. You've changed since Coach Crushjaw gave you that weird helmet
Teddy blinked. The other Farmhouse Mystery Kids went quiet. Even at their most rambunctious, such language was never used among them.
"Dude," scoffed Tina, "I don't care how rad you are at football now. You've changed since Coach Crushjaw gave you that weird helmet
January 11, 2026 at 1:11 AM
a wuss!" snarled Football Casey.
Teddy blinked. The other Farmhouse Mystery Kids went quiet. Even at their most rambunctious, such language was never used among them.
"Dude," scoffed Tina, "I don't care how rad you are at football now. You've changed since Coach Crushjaw gave you that weird helmet
Teddy blinked. The other Farmhouse Mystery Kids went quiet. Even at their most rambunctious, such language was never used among them.
"Dude," scoffed Tina, "I don't care how rad you are at football now. You've changed since Coach Crushjaw gave you that weird helmet
Bro's got me going pshaw
January 11, 2026 at 12:46 AM
Bro's got me going pshaw
Without revealing your actual age, what's an oath you've broken that rendered you temporarily mortal?
January 10, 2026 at 11:12 PM
Without revealing your actual age, what's an oath you've broken that rendered you temporarily mortal?
Reposted by michael lutz
ELLO GUVNOR
OI'M AWFF
AN OI LUV EE'IN CATS
OI'M AWFF
AN OI LUV EE'IN CATS
January 10, 2026 at 1:39 PM
ELLO GUVNOR
OI'M AWFF
AN OI LUV EE'IN CATS
OI'M AWFF
AN OI LUV EE'IN CATS
Reposted by michael lutz
[offended] From time to time I may be at his beck. But I certainly am not at his call
January 10, 2026 at 2:44 AM
[offended] From time to time I may be at his beck. But I certainly am not at his call
Reposted by michael lutz
Alf had a British accent. You've simply been gaslit into remembering otherwise
January 10, 2026 at 12:38 AM
Alf had a British accent. You've simply been gaslit into remembering otherwise
Reposted by michael lutz
Reposted by michael lutz
fucking around/finding out
(the horse was fine i promise)
(the horse was fine i promise)
January 9, 2026 at 5:14 PM
fucking around/finding out
(the horse was fine i promise)
(the horse was fine i promise)
Reposted by michael lutz
