Willie Fitzgerald
@williefitz.bsky.social
Mr. Lunch
Writer, editor, galoot. Stories in Joyland, Boulevard, StoryQuarterly and elsewhere. Senior Editor at American Short Fiction.
Writer, editor, galoot. Stories in Joyland, Boulevard, StoryQuarterly and elsewhere. Senior Editor at American Short Fiction.
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
I sent this video to my friend and she got mad at me
December 28, 2025 at 1:12 AM
I sent this video to my friend and she got mad at me
ants: nature's fellas
December 26, 2025 at 9:40 PM
ants: nature's fellas
achieving peak Home for Christmas: reading a book about the history of longitude and eating almost nothing but bread and cheese
December 26, 2025 at 8:08 PM
achieving peak Home for Christmas: reading a book about the history of longitude and eating almost nothing but bread and cheese
DVD is short for "Da ViDeo"
December 26, 2025 at 5:58 PM
DVD is short for "Da ViDeo"
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Shout out to my road dogg Pot Bear
December 26, 2025 at 12:08 PM
Shout out to my road dogg Pot Bear
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
each option is funnier than the last
November 28, 2024 at 1:32 AM
each option is funnier than the last
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
December 24, 2025 at 2:47 AM
Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
"making up a guy to pander to," endemic in the pundit class
December 21, 2025 at 3:35 PM
"making up a guy to pander to," endemic in the pundit class
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
*indecisive zz top ordering at a bakery voice*:
give me all your muffins
all your scones and biscuits too
give me all your muffins
all your scones and biscuits too
December 19, 2025 at 6:35 PM
*indecisive zz top ordering at a bakery voice*:
give me all your muffins
all your scones and biscuits too
give me all your muffins
all your scones and biscuits too
go ahead, get mad about men and "method" acting. I'm over here dedicated to "me thod" acting (school of acting developed by caveman named Thod)
December 19, 2025 at 3:36 PM
go ahead, get mad about men and "method" acting. I'm over here dedicated to "me thod" acting (school of acting developed by caveman named Thod)
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Heres a simple trick even an idiot can do
Make a pot of coffee, boil up a bunch of hot dogs in there. You got yourself a feed of jitter dogs. Simple
Make a pot of coffee, boil up a bunch of hot dogs in there. You got yourself a feed of jitter dogs. Simple
February 14, 2024 at 10:46 PM
Heres a simple trick even an idiot can do
Make a pot of coffee, boil up a bunch of hot dogs in there. You got yourself a feed of jitter dogs. Simple
Make a pot of coffee, boil up a bunch of hot dogs in there. You got yourself a feed of jitter dogs. Simple
this is a list of the words that all three Beastie Boys shout on an unreleased song, which drove everyone who listened to it to madness
someone accidently stumbled on an insanely ominious cdc government page, it’s a massive list of random words that looks like this. anyone know whats going on here?
ftp.cdc.gov/pub/health_S...
ftp.cdc.gov/pub/health_S...
December 19, 2025 at 12:32 AM
this is a list of the words that all three Beastie Boys shout on an unreleased song, which drove everyone who listened to it to madness
ME: I just feel like—like, you’re really on my back about this.
GF: We’re trying to *save* money!
ME: This was important!
THE THEREMIN PLAYER I HIRED TO FOLLOW ME AROUND FOR THE DAY: vvzzzzzZZwweeeEEEEEEEEEooooooOOOOO
ME: OK, really not helping, Eric.
GF: We’re trying to *save* money!
ME: This was important!
THE THEREMIN PLAYER I HIRED TO FOLLOW ME AROUND FOR THE DAY: vvzzzzzZZwweeeEEEEEEEEEooooooOOOOO
ME: OK, really not helping, Eric.
December 19, 2025 at 12:01 AM
ME: I just feel like—like, you’re really on my back about this.
GF: We’re trying to *save* money!
ME: This was important!
THE THEREMIN PLAYER I HIRED TO FOLLOW ME AROUND FOR THE DAY: vvzzzzzZZwweeeEEEEEEEEEooooooOOOOO
ME: OK, really not helping, Eric.
GF: We’re trying to *save* money!
ME: This was important!
THE THEREMIN PLAYER I HIRED TO FOLLOW ME AROUND FOR THE DAY: vvzzzzzZZwweeeEEEEEEEEEooooooOOOOO
ME: OK, really not helping, Eric.
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Hath Milord any GAMES upon his PHONE?
August 14, 2023 at 11:19 PM
Hath Milord any GAMES upon his PHONE?
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
Bobby Bolaño get your country ass in here this minute
Chile's Preident Elect Kast is the Son of a Nazi Party Member who escaped to Chile.
December 15, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Bobby Bolaño get your country ass in here this minute
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
honkin on bobo
Kissing her neck
December 14, 2025 at 8:27 PM
honkin on bobo
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
[dune voice]: i must not fear. fear is a real bummer
April 27, 2024 at 10:08 PM
[dune voice]: i must not fear. fear is a real bummer
Reposted by Willie Fitzgerald
what you hear while kirby is beating you senseless for taking his strawberry shortcake or whatever
December 12, 2025 at 5:20 PM
what you hear while kirby is beating you senseless for taking his strawberry shortcake or whatever
my personal fav
December 12, 2025 at 6:54 PM
my personal fav
Now That's What I Call Not A Pipe!
December 12, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Now That's What I Call Not A Pipe!