Noga Beans
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toddsleaving.bsky.social
Noga Beans
@toddsleaving.bsky.social
For an urban boy on a dirty tour, I never felt so clean… 🟥⬜️⬛️🟨
Q: ChatGPT please give me strategies that make it appear we’re taking the temperature down in MSP in a way out Fox News anchors can sell while we can still terrorize the citizenry.

A: Everything that’s happened in the last 24 hours.
January 29, 2026 at 1:15 AM
anger is a gift.
January 24, 2026 at 4:47 PM
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He's only going to get worse. And faster.
January 20, 2026 at 10:01 PM
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You really have to have a touch of sado-masochism in you to even be a sports fan.

By definition only one team in the sport you're following is going to end up being the champion. The odds of your team being those guys are pretty slim.

What is wrong with us?
January 18, 2026 at 9:45 PM
Oh, the Administration that told me she was trying to kill that agent is also telling me the economy is great.
January 17, 2026 at 7:54 PM
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BREAKING: The Los Angeles Dodgers have purchased the Tampa Bay Rays and traded the entire organization to the Pittsburgh Pirates in exchange for RHP Paul Skenes
January 16, 2026 at 5:26 AM
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So she had a pulse. That’s what the doctor on the scene wanted to check. She wasn’t breathing, but she had a pulse. He could have started CPR right away.

Instead ICE barred the doctor from attending her and waited 15 mins for EMT to get to her.
January 16, 2026 at 3:03 PM
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Oh now Matthew Golden catches a deep ball after fantasy is done
January 11, 2026 at 1:55 AM
There is zero chance these numbers are even real. Can’t imagine how bad it is.
The jobs report is in. What a disaster.
January 9, 2026 at 7:06 PM
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Members of Congress: stop posting online and APPEAR, PHYSICALLY on the steps of the Capitol to decry this unconstitutional violation of domestic & international law. SHOW THE PEOPLE the level of danger we are facing as a country.
@housedemocrats.bsky.social
@senatedemocrats.bsky.social
January 3, 2026 at 5:17 PM
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these documents are more blacked out than Pete Hegseth on New Years Eve
December 19, 2025 at 10:33 PM
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“Post-liberalism” means two things:

1) I like the fascism, but I don’t think of myself as the sort of person who’d be into something so uncouth.

2) The woke made me do it, but since everyone’s opposed to liberty now, why don’t we acknowledge that some races, genders, and religions are lesser.
December 13, 2025 at 1:48 PM
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FACT: If you Invested $12,500 in Melania Trump's memecoin scheme 11 months ago at its peak, you now have $118.

Congrats for getting scammed by the First Family.
December 1, 2025 at 2:24 AM
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There is literally no reason for the military to be in D.C.
November 28, 2025 at 4:13 AM
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BREAKING: AOC on MTG retiring:

"She's carefully timing her departure just 1-2 days after her pension kicks in and after making millions of dollars insider trading stocks for weapons manufacturers and others while in office."
November 22, 2025 at 2:21 PM
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Autocorrect has become our worst enema.
November 19, 2025 at 10:04 PM
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When MTG goes back to her old ways my “I told ya’s” are gonna be lit
November 19, 2025 at 2:14 PM
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In a world full of Wayne Gretzkys, be a Mario Lemieux

mariolemieux.org
Home - Mario Lemieux Foundation
mariolemieux.org
November 15, 2025 at 4:48 PM
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November 10, 2025 at 2:16 AM
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agreeing to make a terrible deal while your main opponent is quite literally being boo'd on live tv by an entire stadium of people is the kind of political instinct you'd normally only find in a 3 week old dead goldfish
November 10, 2025 at 12:36 AM
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Long live the sandwich tosser!
November 6, 2025 at 10:46 PM
Tomorrow is my last day of hearing "I AM SPEAKING!" ads... oh well...
November 3, 2025 at 4:08 PM
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Blake Treinen in the bullpen watching a six-hour YouTube video about chemtrails and who REALLY profits from weather modification on his phone. This is part of his process. He can't give up three straight doubles unless he's in the right mindset.
November 2, 2025 at 3:47 AM
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“They’ve got money for ICE and golden ballrooms but not for hungry families” is so easy it’s almost funny
Johnson: Snap benefits is a unique situation. I got a summary of the legal analysis…the contingency funds are not legally available to cover the benefits right now
October 27, 2025 at 4:41 PM
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September 26, 2025 at 12:05 AM