Bela Lugoatse
banner
theilluminati.bsky.social
Bela Lugoatse
@theilluminati.bsky.social
butt
Pinned
New followers: If you don't understand my name, don't Google it!!!
Paleontology is limited because it samples for idiots. Dipshit creatures that fall into tar pits, collapse into bogs, get stuck to trees, etc.
February 8, 2026 at 3:44 PM
Olympics Opening Ceremony
February 7, 2026 at 1:24 AM
WALTER BENJAMIN EAT YOUR FUCKING HEART OUT
Starting to think these weren’t really applied with the consideration required by law
February 5, 2026 at 7:53 PM
According to Karafun, one of the top most requested karaoke tracks of all time, sandwiched between Piano Man and Jolene, is Tequila???
February 2, 2026 at 9:56 PM
Reposted by Bela Lugoatse
January 26, 2026 at 2:58 PM
My wife has asked me twice in the last 24 hours if I'm sure the sliced ham I bought is cooked
January 26, 2026 at 5:03 PM
If my name were Tony Blair I wouldn't be writing bylines blaming the need for violence on weapons that were not present
From the NY Post. You know they are really scrambling when they are running "The gun was no angel" stories.
January 25, 2026 at 7:13 PM
You can't blame one person for ruining the free internet but you CAN still beat the person who banned links from Instagram posts to death
January 23, 2026 at 7:01 PM
Sinema 🤜🤛 Qaddafi
Sleeping with your security detail
Learning things I didn't need to know about Kristin Sinema; she (allegedly) slept with multiple members of her security detail.
January 15, 2026 at 6:52 PM
Who is Hans Zimmer's agent??? I just want to talk
January 15, 2026 at 4:29 PM
Elon Musk: A skull shape check should be mandatory before every employment

Thirty people on here: You may not know this, but there are parallels between what Elon Musk is saying and what prominent race scientists said in the 1890s (🧵1/69)
January 15, 2026 at 3:40 PM
My wife texting me about the grocery list:
Trump: "It's actually a legal definition -- 'whole milk.' And it's whole with a W for those of you that have a problem."
January 15, 2026 at 3:24 PM
A friend announced that he'd been in a "car accident" while driving his child and this is what our NUMTOT ass slackbot did:
January 10, 2026 at 12:43 AM
Big Balls going full Uncut Gems in the White House as he tries to convince someone to put some boots on the ground before the bill comes due
January 7, 2026 at 5:50 AM
My dream job is being the person who uploads videos that read "PHYSICS IS COOL" over an anchor chain snapping and hitting a deep sea oil rig guy in the nads
January 6, 2026 at 3:23 PM
If you were a 60s rocker, "Linda Lou" was the sexiest name you could think of. You'd spend your whole life wishing to moan "Linda Lou" in a sexual situation
January 5, 2026 at 3:38 PM
Coworker: Are you watching the new Fallout season?
Me, visibly sweating: I'm still catching up
January 4, 2026 at 3:31 PM
He waited till Zohran was mayor to bring Maduro to a New York courthouse because he was afraid Adams would accidentally deport him back
January 3, 2026 at 9:49 PM
Folks we all hope for the good thing but if China kidnapped Trump in the middle of the night, you'd react with anger, fear, and defense of our national sovereignty too
January 3, 2026 at 6:04 PM
Reposted by Bela Lugoatse
if you are talking today about how bad maduro was and were alive, at all, during the run-up to the iraq war you are potentially the dumbest person to ever live
January 3, 2026 at 5:00 PM
January 3, 2026 at 4:59 PM
Mr. Blue Sky is both a phenomenal song and the meanest thing you can call someone in 2025
January 3, 2026 at 3:08 PM
Someone should resurrect Morgan Spurlock and make him eat a Big Mac, a Quarter Pounder, a Filet of Fish, a Large Fries, and 325mg of aspirin every day for a month to prove some sort of point
January 2, 2026 at 1:57 AM
January 2, 2026 at 1:17 AM
2026 Predictions
January 1, 2026 at 7:38 AM