Sam Means
@stmeans.bsky.social
The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins, coming soon to NBC
Reposted by Sam Means
I may just be a simple country hooftrimming video watcher, but I think it's time we raise America's hoof, pare away the separated horn until we reach the infected area, spray it with a powerful cleansing agent, and place a salicylic acid wrap on the foot so we can begin to heal
November 13, 2025 at 1:06 AM
I may just be a simple country hooftrimming video watcher, but I think it's time we raise America's hoof, pare away the separated horn until we reach the infected area, spray it with a powerful cleansing agent, and place a salicylic acid wrap on the foot so we can begin to heal
Reposted by Sam Means
I made a “how do you do, fellow kids?” joke to someone in their mid 20s who, it turns out, was too young to have heard of that meme.
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
November 7, 2025 at 5:28 PM
I made a “how do you do, fellow kids?” joke to someone in their mid 20s who, it turns out, was too young to have heard of that meme.
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
Reposted by Sam Means
New York millionaires: threatening to flee the city since 2009
November 7, 2025 at 9:36 PM
New York millionaires: threatening to flee the city since 2009
Reposted by Sam Means
If you're looking for some food banks to donate to, we vetted a ton all over the country back in 2020, in conjunction with our marble league sponsorship, a sentence that I swear made sense in context. Anyway -- there are links to 17 of them in this thread. (And apologies for linking to... y'know.)
Last Week Tonight on X: "Congratulations to all the winners of Marble League 2020! Through our sponsorship, they raised $100K for worthy causes. Here’s a thread of the winners and where their funds went:" / X
Congratulations to all the winners of Marble League 2020! Through our sponsorship, they raised $100K for worthy causes. Here’s a thread of the winners and where their funds went:
x.com
October 27, 2025 at 1:46 AM
If you're looking for some food banks to donate to, we vetted a ton all over the country back in 2020, in conjunction with our marble league sponsorship, a sentence that I swear made sense in context. Anyway -- there are links to 17 of them in this thread. (And apologies for linking to... y'know.)
Q: What did Emeril say to the panda on Halloween?
A: Bamboo!
A: Bamboo!
November 1, 2025 at 2:57 AM
Q: What did Emeril say to the panda on Halloween?
A: Bamboo!
A: Bamboo!
Reposted by Sam Means
If you keep lowering your standards to “win” against the other side, eventually you’ll just be on the other side
October 22, 2025 at 12:50 AM
If you keep lowering your standards to “win” against the other side, eventually you’ll just be on the other side
Reposted by Sam Means
Reminder that Violent J of Insane Clown Posse has the correct response to a lot of the shitty things he said in the early days.
October 21, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Reminder that Violent J of Insane Clown Posse has the correct response to a lot of the shitty things he said in the early days.
Reposted by Sam Means
Jared Leto may have a toxic reputation, he may have a wildly unappealing screen presence, but say what you will, he also can't open a movie either.
October 11, 2025 at 4:32 PM
Jared Leto may have a toxic reputation, he may have a wildly unappealing screen presence, but say what you will, he also can't open a movie either.
Reposted by Sam Means
One of the joys of making television is having to do writers rooms on location in places like an abandoned Sunday school classroom in Yonkers.
October 4, 2025 at 10:44 PM
One of the joys of making television is having to do writers rooms on location in places like an abandoned Sunday school classroom in Yonkers.
It's honestly helpful of Saudi Arabia to provide me with a list of people never to hire or work with again.
September 28, 2025 at 12:54 AM
It's honestly helpful of Saudi Arabia to provide me with a list of people never to hire or work with again.
Reposted by Sam Means
11th anniversary of POKING A DEAD FROG. If you haven’t yet read it, and like comedy, maybe you’ll enjoy!
To celebrate, I'll be posting some excerpts and images from the book.
This excerpt is from the interview with Mel Brooks
www.amazon.com/Poking-Dead-...
To celebrate, I'll be posting some excerpts and images from the book.
This excerpt is from the interview with Mel Brooks
www.amazon.com/Poking-Dead-...
September 27, 2025 at 11:48 AM
11th anniversary of POKING A DEAD FROG. If you haven’t yet read it, and like comedy, maybe you’ll enjoy!
To celebrate, I'll be posting some excerpts and images from the book.
This excerpt is from the interview with Mel Brooks
www.amazon.com/Poking-Dead-...
To celebrate, I'll be posting some excerpts and images from the book.
This excerpt is from the interview with Mel Brooks
www.amazon.com/Poking-Dead-...
Reposted by Sam Means
September 27, 2025 at 11:19 AM
Reposted by Sam Means
This is great. Mike is doing something no one else is doing in comedy and it's pretty wonderful.
You’ve Never Heard of Alt-Comedy’s Favorite Writer (He Wants It That Way)
Mike Sacks’ bizarre books and podcasts have drawn a cult following among celebrities from Jon Hamm to Bob Odenkirk. And if you don’t know his name, well, that’s entirely his fault.
www.hollywoodreporter.com
September 6, 2025 at 9:01 PM
This is great. Mike is doing something no one else is doing in comedy and it's pretty wonderful.
Reposted by Sam Means
Reposted by Sam Means
Turns out a grand jury will not necessarily indict a ham sandwich www.nytimes.com/2025/08/27/u...
Prosecutors Fail to Secure Indictment Against Man Who Threw Sandwich at Federal Agent
www.nytimes.com
August 27, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Turns out a grand jury will not necessarily indict a ham sandwich www.nytimes.com/2025/08/27/u...
I have had it up to here with my three children, Jennifer, Jason, and Leigh.
August 20, 2025 at 3:53 AM
I have had it up to here with my three children, Jennifer, Jason, and Leigh.
Why was I not told about Freaky Tales? That movie was a goddamn delight.
August 17, 2025 at 3:09 AM
Why was I not told about Freaky Tales? That movie was a goddamn delight.
I'm living in hell. No one will tell me what updog is.
August 12, 2025 at 3:08 AM
I'm living in hell. No one will tell me what updog is.
"Rock, me Amadeus" - Mozart introducing himself to Dwayne Johnson using his middle name
August 4, 2025 at 12:43 PM
"Rock, me Amadeus" - Mozart introducing himself to Dwayne Johnson using his middle name
Reposted by Sam Means
I'll tell you what. If Google reader hadn't died, I'd be better off.
August 4, 2025 at 3:21 AM
I'll tell you what. If Google reader hadn't died, I'd be better off.
Reposted by Sam Means
A Google search for the phrase, "Actually, Jay Leno was right about" yields no results.
July 27, 2025 at 8:03 PM
A Google search for the phrase, "Actually, Jay Leno was right about" yields no results.