David J Prokopetz
@prokopetz.bsky.social
Main site at https://prokopetz.net
Going through the comments every time I propose a game premise with a first-act genre swerve identifying all the people who've only ever played one game with a first-act genre swerve.
February 12, 2026 at 5:25 PM
Going through the comments every time I propose a game premise with a first-act genre swerve identifying all the people who've only ever played one game with a first-act genre swerve.
The thing about the classic "game that starts as a walking sim about exploring a cave, then a Shocking Discovery establishes the real genre" conceit is there's no limit on what that real genre can be. "Dungeon crawler" is traditional, of course, but there's no rule that it can't be "shop simulator".
February 12, 2026 at 3:32 PM
The thing about the classic "game that starts as a walking sim about exploring a cave, then a Shocking Discovery establishes the real genre" conceit is there's no limit on what that real genre can be. "Dungeon crawler" is traditional, of course, but there's no rule that it can't be "shop simulator".
In the interest of even-handedness, as of today I will be expanding my "anything that's not immediately comprehensible to me is fetish content" policy beyond erotica to encompass all expressions and concepts.
February 12, 2026 at 2:48 PM
In the interest of even-handedness, as of today I will be expanding my "anything that's not immediately comprehensible to me is fetish content" policy beyond erotica to encompass all expressions and concepts.
One of my favourite things is video game fan animations where the characters have detailed facial animations with full lip sync but the actual "voices" are still just like bubbupbupbupbup.
February 12, 2026 at 4:59 AM
One of my favourite things is video game fan animations where the characters have detailed facial animations with full lip sync but the actual "voices" are still just like bubbupbupbupbup.
I bet it feels amazing to dress up in a well-fitted suit of full plate armour and be struck with various archaic weapons for demonstration purposes.
February 11, 2026 at 7:39 PM
I bet it feels amazing to dress up in a well-fitted suit of full plate armour and be struck with various archaic weapons for demonstration purposes.
Reposted by David J Prokopetz
Had a quest in dwarf fortress where I needed to go talk to this guy in a tavern so I get there, introduce my self, start to say what I need and he falls over dead because he had his head torn off years ago during world generation and never noticed until I made the game load his body into memory.
February 11, 2026 at 7:26 AM
Had a quest in dwarf fortress where I needed to go talk to this guy in a tavern so I get there, introduce my self, start to say what I need and he falls over dead because he had his head torn off years ago during world generation and never noticed until I made the game load his body into memory.
The Good News: "Mega Man X2" speedrunners finally found an RTA-viable way to clip into the room under Magna Centipede's stage.
The Bad News: The only required stage boss on the new any% route is Crystal Snail.
Sometimes it feels like the universe goes "hey, you know what would be REALLY funny?"
The Bad News: The only required stage boss on the new any% route is Crystal Snail.
Sometimes it feels like the universe goes "hey, you know what would be REALLY funny?"
February 11, 2026 at 3:45 PM
The Good News: "Mega Man X2" speedrunners finally found an RTA-viable way to clip into the room under Magna Centipede's stage.
The Bad News: The only required stage boss on the new any% route is Crystal Snail.
Sometimes it feels like the universe goes "hey, you know what would be REALLY funny?"
The Bad News: The only required stage boss on the new any% route is Crystal Snail.
Sometimes it feels like the universe goes "hey, you know what would be REALLY funny?"
Horror is when you open a door and there's a guy.
February 10, 2026 at 7:57 PM
Horror is when you open a door and there's a guy.
Reposted by David J Prokopetz
"The final boss died on his way back to his home planet."
February 10, 2026 at 5:16 PM
"The final boss died on his way back to his home planet."
When a video game boss glitches out the first time you fight it, that colours your perspective no matter how many times you do it "correctly". I fought a final boss where I hit it once and it shot straight up into the air and just never came down, and as far as I'm concerned that's the canon ending.
February 10, 2026 at 4:54 PM
When a video game boss glitches out the first time you fight it, that colours your perspective no matter how many times you do it "correctly". I fought a final boss where I hit it once and it shot straight up into the air and just never came down, and as far as I'm concerned that's the canon ending.
Forget combat-focused metroidvanias with unique glory kill animations for every monster type – what we need is a stealth-focused metroidvania with a unique backstab animation for every monster type. I want to know where a giant flying baby head that shoots exploding eyeballs keeps its vital organs.
February 10, 2026 at 4:25 PM
Forget combat-focused metroidvanias with unique glory kill animations for every monster type – what we need is a stealth-focused metroidvania with a unique backstab animation for every monster type. I want to know where a giant flying baby head that shoots exploding eyeballs keeps its vital organs.
I love it when a game content flags for "implied sexuality" because sometimes that means "the narrative textually acknowledges that sex exists", and sometimes that means "well, you can't see ALL of the protagonist's cock", and you never know which one you're going to get.
February 10, 2026 at 7:25 AM
I love it when a game content flags for "implied sexuality" because sometimes that means "the narrative textually acknowledges that sex exists", and sometimes that means "well, you can't see ALL of the protagonist's cock", and you never know which one you're going to get.
Game that initially appears to be one of those short form "guy stuck in a submarine" deals where you spend ten minutes learning how to operate cryptic control panels and then die, except when you reach the "ending" the submarine surfaces and SURPRISE, FUCKER, you're playing Myst now.
February 10, 2026 at 1:57 AM
Game that initially appears to be one of those short form "guy stuck in a submarine" deals where you spend ten minutes learning how to operate cryptic control panels and then die, except when you reach the "ending" the submarine surfaces and SURPRISE, FUCKER, you're playing Myst now.
Writing porn about characters with no canonical information about their downstairs situations and assigning cock sizes based purely on what would be most awkward for all concerned.
February 9, 2026 at 11:57 PM
Writing porn about characters with no canonical information about their downstairs situations and assigning cock sizes based purely on what would be most awkward for all concerned.
(1/2)
Essential ambiguously gay members of the upper class twit friend group:
1. The respectable but moody one with a dire secret he dares not name
2. The disreputable one whose misdeeds are never specified in the text
3. The one whose "poetical temperament" is treated as a source of low comedy
Essential ambiguously gay members of the upper class twit friend group:
1. The respectable but moody one with a dire secret he dares not name
2. The disreputable one whose misdeeds are never specified in the text
3. The one whose "poetical temperament" is treated as a source of low comedy
February 9, 2026 at 9:29 PM
(1/2)
Essential ambiguously gay members of the upper class twit friend group:
1. The respectable but moody one with a dire secret he dares not name
2. The disreputable one whose misdeeds are never specified in the text
3. The one whose "poetical temperament" is treated as a source of low comedy
Essential ambiguously gay members of the upper class twit friend group:
1. The respectable but moody one with a dire secret he dares not name
2. The disreputable one whose misdeeds are never specified in the text
3. The one whose "poetical temperament" is treated as a source of low comedy
It kind of feels unfair that the Legend of Zelda franchise exists because it takes so many fun hypotheticals off the table. "Which video game series would be the worst if you had to invent a timeline where all games occur in chronological release order" no bet, it's Zelda. It's always fucking Zelda.
February 9, 2026 at 7:50 PM
It kind of feels unfair that the Legend of Zelda franchise exists because it takes so many fun hypotheticals off the table. "Which video game series would be the worst if you had to invent a timeline where all games occur in chronological release order" no bet, it's Zelda. It's always fucking Zelda.
I've been sufficiently successful in confusing YouTube's algorithm about my demographic data that it's apparently just given up and started serving me ads based on the language of the video I'm viewing. I was watching some undubbed Bruce Lee clips and it hit me with a preroll in Cantonese.
February 9, 2026 at 5:19 PM
I've been sufficiently successful in confusing YouTube's algorithm about my demographic data that it's apparently just given up and started serving me ads based on the language of the video I'm viewing. I was watching some undubbed Bruce Lee clips and it hit me with a preroll in Cantonese.
This game only uses six-sided dice because polyhedrons are a bourgeois indulgence.
February 9, 2026 at 5:11 PM
This game only uses six-sided dice because polyhedrons are a bourgeois indulgence.
Going around and asking my friends, hey, purely hypothetically, if you were, say, a giant mutant boss in a survival-horror video game, what do you think your boss fight's speed kill strat would be? Pure curiosity, no wrong answers.
February 9, 2026 at 7:29 AM
Going around and asking my friends, hey, purely hypothetically, if you were, say, a giant mutant boss in a survival-horror video game, what do you think your boss fight's speed kill strat would be? Pure curiosity, no wrong answers.
There've been some questions lately regarding what the expected tone of Eat God (www.kickstarter.com/projects/pen...) is, so for the next draft we've put together a discussion of the topic. This will, of course, do nothing to prevent disagreements at the table, but let it not be said I didn't try!
February 9, 2026 at 3:28 AM
There've been some questions lately regarding what the expected tone of Eat God (www.kickstarter.com/projects/pen...) is, so for the next draft we've put together a discussion of the topic. This will, of course, do nothing to prevent disagreements at the table, but let it not be said I didn't try!
Creating an OC who's fucked up because of their parents might seem harmless at first, but unless you're VERY careful to avoid certain topics, at some point you're going to have to think about what their parents actually did to fuck them up, and now your OC's fucked up parents are also your OCs.
February 8, 2026 at 10:53 PM
Creating an OC who's fucked up because of their parents might seem harmless at first, but unless you're VERY careful to avoid certain topics, at some point you're going to have to think about what their parents actually did to fuck them up, and now your OC's fucked up parents are also your OCs.
I don't actually ship it, but
1. I'm pretending I do to annoy my mutuals
2. I think a "bitter exes" dynamic would work well for them
3. I'm morbidly curious to see where this is going
4. I want them to fuck and/or kill each other, not necessarily in that order
5. Every other character is boring
1. I'm pretending I do to annoy my mutuals
2. I think a "bitter exes" dynamic would work well for them
3. I'm morbidly curious to see where this is going
4. I want them to fuck and/or kill each other, not necessarily in that order
5. Every other character is boring
February 8, 2026 at 10:44 PM
I don't actually ship it, but
1. I'm pretending I do to annoy my mutuals
2. I think a "bitter exes" dynamic would work well for them
3. I'm morbidly curious to see where this is going
4. I want them to fuck and/or kill each other, not necessarily in that order
5. Every other character is boring
1. I'm pretending I do to annoy my mutuals
2. I think a "bitter exes" dynamic would work well for them
3. I'm morbidly curious to see where this is going
4. I want them to fuck and/or kill each other, not necessarily in that order
5. Every other character is boring
The warping influence of D&D5E on what folks think a "story focused" TTRPG is definitely has a cousin in console RPGs where people who have only ever played Dark Souls clones think a "strong narrative" is when the environmental storytelling toilet skeleton has two paragraphs of lore instead of one.
February 7, 2026 at 11:32 PM
The warping influence of D&D5E on what folks think a "story focused" TTRPG is definitely has a cousin in console RPGs where people who have only ever played Dark Souls clones think a "strong narrative" is when the environmental storytelling toilet skeleton has two paragraphs of lore instead of one.
Even when you think you've seen it all, the sheer breadth of what people are prepared to get sexually hung up on can still surprise you. I just bumped into someone whose entire bookmark list consisted exclusively of drawings of girls playing full-court basketball with their dicks out.
February 7, 2026 at 7:50 PM
Even when you think you've seen it all, the sheer breadth of what people are prepared to get sexually hung up on can still surprise you. I just bumped into someone whose entire bookmark list consisted exclusively of drawings of girls playing full-court basketball with their dicks out.
Robot character who gets blown up in every episode in a way that's initially played for laughs, but it later transpires that they're actually really bothered by it and just didn't say anything because anybody else getting blown up would have been a lot worse, so really it's better this way, right?
February 6, 2026 at 9:10 PM
Robot character who gets blown up in every episode in a way that's initially played for laughs, but it later transpires that they're actually really bothered by it and just didn't say anything because anybody else getting blown up would have been a lot worse, so really it's better this way, right?