Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
@monkeyphysics.bsky.social
Chemist, saxophonist, pianist, occasional dungeon master, martial artist, massive nerd.
Also, autistic. That one's new.
Currently manifesting as some kind of swamp creature.
Also, autistic. That one's new.
Currently manifesting as some kind of swamp creature.
Never ceases to amaze me how we can critfail basic life stuff, like I'm pretty sure I'm rolling with advantage with a DC of 2 but sometimes you just Sleep Wrong and now your calves hurt for two days
it's cool how I've been drinking from cups for probably 43 years and sometimes I will still just utterly fuck up the process and dump coffee on myself
November 10, 2025 at 1:56 PM
Never ceases to amaze me how we can critfail basic life stuff, like I'm pretty sure I'm rolling with advantage with a DC of 2 but sometimes you just Sleep Wrong and now your calves hurt for two days
I was going to say "society is boned" but I'm pretty sure the physical act of boning is probably going to decrease in frequency with this
Oh good, ChatGPT is getting "erotica for verified adults" later this year
October 15, 2025 at 9:06 AM
I was going to say "society is boned" but I'm pretty sure the physical act of boning is probably going to decrease in frequency with this
A consequence of being the kind of geek who likes to do voices for his D&D characters: new hobgoblin warlock sounds like Foghorn Leghorn on mild sedation
October 13, 2025 at 11:47 AM
A consequence of being the kind of geek who likes to do voices for his D&D characters: new hobgoblin warlock sounds like Foghorn Leghorn on mild sedation
As I drag myself out of bed once more, I feel like it should be illegal for a person to work for longer in a day than they slept the night before
September 30, 2025 at 5:52 AM
As I drag myself out of bed once more, I feel like it should be illegal for a person to work for longer in a day than they slept the night before
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
Two words: Garrus Vakarian
why are you LGBTQ+, correct answers only
i saw someone posting about HRT on twitter and thought "sure, fuck it, why not" before putting it on my 'see if this can fix you before you JFK yourself' bucket list
i saw someone posting about HRT on twitter and thought "sure, fuck it, why not" before putting it on my 'see if this can fix you before you JFK yourself' bucket list
July 4, 2025 at 8:06 AM
Two words: Garrus Vakarian
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
I'm beyond happy to share that @teamfourstar.bsky.social has voiced my Vegeta Pride comic!! 🪩🕺
A huge thank you to @kaiserneko.bsky.social and everyone over at TFS for bringing my comic to life, it's like a dream come true!
Happy Pride!! 😁🫶❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
A huge thank you to @kaiserneko.bsky.social and everyone over at TFS for bringing my comic to life, it's like a dream come true!
Happy Pride!! 😁🫶❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
June 26, 2025 at 11:31 PM
I'm beyond happy to share that @teamfourstar.bsky.social has voiced my Vegeta Pride comic!! 🪩🕺
A huge thank you to @kaiserneko.bsky.social and everyone over at TFS for bringing my comic to life, it's like a dream come true!
Happy Pride!! 😁🫶❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
A huge thank you to @kaiserneko.bsky.social and everyone over at TFS for bringing my comic to life, it's like a dream come true!
Happy Pride!! 😁🫶❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
the president wont see your cheap dunks against jeffery epstein . But your friends who have ties to state sponsored pedophilia will
June 5, 2025 at 8:05 PM
the president wont see your cheap dunks against jeffery epstein . But your friends who have ties to state sponsored pedophilia will
I have three types of TTRPG characters:
- Creepy healer type with absolutely zero ulterior motives
- Rock-brained muscle man who gets adopted by another party member
- Husky-voiced charisma caster who quickly ends up in the role of Mum Friend to the rest of the team
- Creepy healer type with absolutely zero ulterior motives
- Rock-brained muscle man who gets adopted by another party member
- Husky-voiced charisma caster who quickly ends up in the role of Mum Friend to the rest of the team
I have three types of TTRPG characters:
- Edwardian Gentlemen horribly out of place in the setting
- Your kindly grandparent with a mace who also bakes
- Good aligned Necromancer Private Detective
- Edwardian Gentlemen horribly out of place in the setting
- Your kindly grandparent with a mace who also bakes
- Good aligned Necromancer Private Detective
I have three types of TTRPG characters:
-the mom friend in heavy armour
-the tiefling with daddy issues
-my Patron could beat up your Patron
-the mom friend in heavy armour
-the tiefling with daddy issues
-my Patron could beat up your Patron
May 13, 2025 at 2:12 PM
I have three types of TTRPG characters:
- Creepy healer type with absolutely zero ulterior motives
- Rock-brained muscle man who gets adopted by another party member
- Husky-voiced charisma caster who quickly ends up in the role of Mum Friend to the rest of the team
- Creepy healer type with absolutely zero ulterior motives
- Rock-brained muscle man who gets adopted by another party member
- Husky-voiced charisma caster who quickly ends up in the role of Mum Friend to the rest of the team
Red flags in a woman:
- no
- no what are you doing
- flags don't go there
- get this woman to a hospital
- no
- no what are you doing
- flags don't go there
- get this woman to a hospital
March 25, 2025 at 6:59 PM
Red flags in a woman:
- no
- no what are you doing
- flags don't go there
- get this woman to a hospital
- no
- no what are you doing
- flags don't go there
- get this woman to a hospital
For those more literary than I, is it considered poor form to compose a sonnet in anger? Because I may have committed Poetry Crime if so
March 20, 2025 at 2:13 PM
For those more literary than I, is it considered poor form to compose a sonnet in anger? Because I may have committed Poetry Crime if so
Spangly bangly bongly wongly wingly dingly dungly twungly twengly spengly spoooooooothkondiboomp.
Horf.
Horf.
February 26, 2025 at 11:30 AM
Spangly bangly bongly wongly wingly dingly dungly twungly twengly spengly spoooooooothkondiboomp.
Horf.
Horf.
If I could be serious for a moment:
bums
bums
This is a VERY Bluesky thing and I need people to try and do this for a week and see if it becomes habit. If you see a post that might be a big joke/shitpost/combination of both, find it in your heart to not reply with something serious. Just try it for ONE WEEK. It could revolutionise this website.
February 25, 2025 at 11:49 AM
If I could be serious for a moment:
bums
bums
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
these guys spent 60 kajillion dollars to make a computer forget how to do math
February 12, 2025 at 11:48 PM
these guys spent 60 kajillion dollars to make a computer forget how to do math
My smartwatch has congratulated me on my workout twice today. I've just been, like, doing my job?
Mayhap I'm having a stressful one
(this post buried under twice as many levels of understatement compared to the usual)
Mayhap I'm having a stressful one
(this post buried under twice as many levels of understatement compared to the usual)
February 7, 2025 at 11:57 AM
My smartwatch has congratulated me on my workout twice today. I've just been, like, doing my job?
Mayhap I'm having a stressful one
(this post buried under twice as many levels of understatement compared to the usual)
Mayhap I'm having a stressful one
(this post buried under twice as many levels of understatement compared to the usual)
(Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
you got this Mike, just stick to the script)
...
"Hi yeah candwich ticken cheetlong harpies?"
Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
you got this Mike, just stick to the script)
...
"Hi yeah candwich ticken cheetlong harpies?"
February 6, 2025 at 5:26 PM
(Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
you got this Mike, just stick to the script)
...
"Hi yeah candwich ticken cheetlong harpies?"
Hi yeah can I get a footlong chicken tikka on hearty Italian please
you got this Mike, just stick to the script)
...
"Hi yeah candwich ticken cheetlong harpies?"
So I'm watching the rugby in this pub (England playing Ireland) and speaking as someone Irish enough to apply for citizenship, how is it that every Irish person you see both on the field and IRL is somehow the most Irish-looking eejit you've ever seen?
Self included, of course.
Self included, of course.
February 1, 2025 at 5:10 PM
So I'm watching the rugby in this pub (England playing Ireland) and speaking as someone Irish enough to apply for citizenship, how is it that every Irish person you see both on the field and IRL is somehow the most Irish-looking eejit you've ever seen?
Self included, of course.
Self included, of course.
I haven't yet seen a "defensible use case" that didn't boil down to "it's fine when I do it because mummy says I'm special"
there is no "defensible use case" for chatgpt. do your own work and use your own brain or fuck off
January 29, 2025 at 8:04 AM
I haven't yet seen a "defensible use case" that didn't boil down to "it's fine when I do it because mummy says I'm special"
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
If anything, I think Musk's harrowingly shit sense of humour is under-discussed. The Florence Foster Jenkins of it all. The deeply unfunny freak who bought the joke factory and juiced its algorithm so he could subject all its users to... this. The gas leak comedy of a psychedelically humourless man.
![Three absolute bangers from Elon Musk. I'm so sorry but you asked for ALT text.
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but how did they get in there??
--
Me: How many radical leftists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Radical leftists: That's not funny [frowny face]
Me: [Crylaugh emoji]
--
When I see the troll emoji, it's like looking in the mirror](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:lss244cnzeoicm3p3nrg5ovh/bafkreihxq3enqkn4zan7tm4okxh3cr6tdmjgupqeq5hz5gdssz6fhnwxie@jpeg)
January 23, 2025 at 5:22 PM
If anything, I think Musk's harrowingly shit sense of humour is under-discussed. The Florence Foster Jenkins of it all. The deeply unfunny freak who bought the joke factory and juiced its algorithm so he could subject all its users to... this. The gas leak comedy of a psychedelically humourless man.
I'm not looking for any videos of Musk doing a fascism, mostly because I've never actually heard the shitbag's voice and I'm trying to keep that going as long as possible
January 21, 2025 at 3:43 PM
I'm not looking for any videos of Musk doing a fascism, mostly because I've never actually heard the shitbag's voice and I'm trying to keep that going as long as possible
Reposted by Mike Byrne, Gobshite King
mentally, i’m here
January 21, 2025 at 1:54 AM
mentally, i’m here
You know it's a good day at work when you get an email with "HELP PLEASE EMERGENCY PANTS" in the subject line
January 7, 2025 at 10:38 AM
You know it's a good day at work when you get an email with "HELP PLEASE EMERGENCY PANTS" in the subject line
Someone needs to close that loophole where you can't be charged for the shit you get up to on a given planet if said planet no longer exists, Samus Aran has been getting away with this for years
i don't follow the news closely these days, but if Luigi is being charged with terrorism then Tom Nook should be charged with racketeering & money laundering
December 19, 2024 at 2:51 PM
Someone needs to close that loophole where you can't be charged for the shit you get up to on a given planet if said planet no longer exists, Samus Aran has been getting away with this for years
Today, in Things I Learned About MTG Against My Will, apparently "sorcery" is a game mechanic of some kind so you can't just exclaim "what is this sorcery?!" upon seeing something bizarre and inexplicable when you're playing, can't believe they're curtailing parlance like this
December 18, 2024 at 1:29 PM
Today, in Things I Learned About MTG Against My Will, apparently "sorcery" is a game mechanic of some kind so you can't just exclaim "what is this sorcery?!" upon seeing something bizarre and inexplicable when you're playing, can't believe they're curtailing parlance like this
hope we sees trollers in newthing witchersy game
December 13, 2024 at 10:22 PM
hope we sees trollers in newthing witchersy game