Mike Schuster
@mcs212.bsky.social
Writer/Video Guy (Atomic Abe, RiffTrax, The Onion)
(reality competition host voice) We promise to abolish ICE............ aaafter the midterms
January 10, 2026 at 11:09 AM
(reality competition host voice) We promise to abolish ICE............ aaafter the midterms
Every Barney parody back then was simmering with hate
January 10, 2026 at 10:31 AM
Every Barney parody back then was simmering with hate
Reposted by Mike Schuster
11 days ago I scribbled some disjointed thoughts about what a year of photographing the men of ICE felt like.
Most of it isn't worth sharing, but these lines here—yeah. I guess. Yeah.
All I can say this afternoon is God will know what to do with them.
Most of it isn't worth sharing, but these lines here—yeah. I guess. Yeah.
All I can say this afternoon is God will know what to do with them.
January 9, 2026 at 9:16 PM
11 days ago I scribbled some disjointed thoughts about what a year of photographing the men of ICE felt like.
Most of it isn't worth sharing, but these lines here—yeah. I guess. Yeah.
All I can say this afternoon is God will know what to do with them.
Most of it isn't worth sharing, but these lines here—yeah. I guess. Yeah.
All I can say this afternoon is God will know what to do with them.
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Being a conservative means never having to explain (or think about) why a mom with kids in school WOULD suddenly try to run over a heavily armed guard, surrounded by other heavily armed guards, while slowly leaving the scene
January 9, 2026 at 8:13 PM
Being a conservative means never having to explain (or think about) why a mom with kids in school WOULD suddenly try to run over a heavily armed guard, surrounded by other heavily armed guards, while slowly leaving the scene
Reposted by Mike Schuster
As someone who really struggles to understand overlapping voices and yelling in general, and particularly when stressed, I know that it would be so easy to “disobey orders” when several cops are screaming them all at once
January 9, 2026 at 7:12 PM
As someone who really struggles to understand overlapping voices and yelling in general, and particularly when stressed, I know that it would be so easy to “disobey orders” when several cops are screaming them all at once
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Many of the people who think they would just calmly follow orders being yelled by angry people armed with guns amid chaotic noise and crowds and activity creating visual noise have likely never even made it through a TSA line without making a flustered mistake.
January 9, 2026 at 7:42 PM
Many of the people who think they would just calmly follow orders being yelled by angry people armed with guns amid chaotic noise and crowds and activity creating visual noise have likely never even made it through a TSA line without making a flustered mistake.
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Yeah we can hangout if you promise not to be a
July 20, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Yeah we can hangout if you promise not to be a
Now let's see the numbers without counting gig jobs
2025 is now, officially, the worst year for job creation outside of recession since 2003.
@byheatherlong.bsky.social
@byheatherlong.bsky.social
January 9, 2026 at 2:06 PM
Now let's see the numbers without counting gig jobs
(rubbing eyes, blinking, throwing away whisky flask)
January 9, 2026 at 12:40 PM
(rubbing eyes, blinking, throwing away whisky flask)
Imagine the saddest Vince Guaraldi soundtrack
January 9, 2026 at 12:36 PM
Imagine the saddest Vince Guaraldi soundtrack
Vaudeville
Without revealing your actual age,what's something you remember that if you told a younger person they wouldn't understand?
January 9, 2026 at 11:03 AM
Vaudeville
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Finally getting referred to get that extra finger removed
The shortage of primary care doctors is a national problem. To cope, a large health system in Massachusetts is using an AI tool to screen patients and refer them to other care. n.pr/45ENu0n
Your next primary care doctor could be online only, accessed through an AI tool
The shortage of primary care doctors is a national problem. To cope, a large health system in Massachusetts is using an AI tool to screen patients and refer them to other care.
n.pr
January 9, 2026 at 10:30 AM
Finally getting referred to get that extra finger removed
As a show of appreciation, every ICE agent should get a nice indoor plant from The Happening
January 9, 2026 at 10:50 AM
As a show of appreciation, every ICE agent should get a nice indoor plant from The Happening
I haven't seen it yet. Do they ever say them's the Pitts?
January 9, 2026 at 4:58 AM
I haven't seen it yet. Do they ever say them's the Pitts?
Reposted by Mike Schuster
You won’t be prepared for Sonic’s voice
3. Segasonic Cosmo Fighter
This is a game meant for a kids ride, so it's over in a few minutes with nothing to it and I sure can't emulate the ride part at home either, but I played it because it has the funny Sonic voice
They should bring this voice back imo
This is a game meant for a kids ride, so it's over in a few minutes with nothing to it and I sure can't emulate the ride part at home either, but I played it because it has the funny Sonic voice
They should bring this voice back imo
January 8, 2026 at 10:57 PM
You won’t be prepared for Sonic’s voice
Who drove?
We Had an Orgy on Our Way Home from the Women's College
January 9, 2026 at 4:07 AM
Who drove?
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Huge pile of papers behind Steven J. Cannell’s desk that failed to make the logo upon landing.
January 9, 2026 at 1:42 AM
Huge pile of papers behind Steven J. Cannell’s desk that failed to make the logo upon landing.
Reposted by Mike Schuster
there needs to be a sex offender registry but for ice guys. you should have to go door to door when you move to a new area and inform your neighbors that you used to be an ice guy. they shouldn't be allowed with 500 feet of a school
January 9, 2026 at 12:24 AM
there needs to be a sex offender registry but for ice guys. you should have to go door to door when you move to a new area and inform your neighbors that you used to be an ice guy. they shouldn't be allowed with 500 feet of a school
Tired: Oh yeah? Go find someone who gives a shit.
Wired:
Wired:
January 8, 2026 at 11:44 PM
Tired: Oh yeah? Go find someone who gives a shit.
Wired:
Wired:
Another comms team slam dunk, Senator
January 8, 2026 at 10:36 PM
Another comms team slam dunk, Senator
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Fucking despise a chart wielding bitch. The numbers say it's dumb to push for a better world. Not me, I want one too, but, the numbers.
January 8, 2026 at 10:04 PM
Fucking despise a chart wielding bitch. The numbers say it's dumb to push for a better world. Not me, I want one too, but, the numbers.
Reposted by Mike Schuster
Klobuchar still voting to confirm Trump appointees the day after a woman in her state gets killed in cold blood by his secret police
Alexander Van Hook is confirmed 53-40 to be a District Judge of Western Louisiana. According to @senatepress.bsky.social, the Dems yeas are Dick Durbin (IL), Maggie Hassan (NH), Tim Kaine (VA), Amy Klobuchar (MN), Jeanne Shaheen (NH), and Peter Welch (VT). Angus King (I-ME) was also a yea.
January 8, 2026 at 9:19 PM
Klobuchar still voting to confirm Trump appointees the day after a woman in her state gets killed in cold blood by his secret police
Reposted by Mike Schuster
The most antisocial animating force in American politics - whether you’re being shot in the face by a republican or yelled at online by a liberal - is crybullying. Just an unbelievably excruciating nation of crybullies yearning for victimhood
January 8, 2026 at 9:30 PM
The most antisocial animating force in American politics - whether you’re being shot in the face by a republican or yelled at online by a liberal - is crybullying. Just an unbelievably excruciating nation of crybullies yearning for victimhood
Reposted by Mike Schuster
I don't think you understand that meme
January 8, 2026 at 3:28 PM
I don't think you understand that meme