Matt Green
mattgreencomedy.com
Matt Green
@mattgreencomedy.com
Comedian, satirist, writer, actor
Reposted by Matt Green
i post this story every christmas, and will keep doing so until it stops making me cry

merry christmas xx
A real Good Samaritan
One act of kindness that befell Leeds writer Bernard Hare in 1982 changed him profoundly. Here he tells his story.
www.bbc.co.uk
December 25, 2025 at 10:25 AM
Reposted by Matt Green
This is the 15th year of #DuvetKnowItsChristmas, which is preposterous. Rules: if you find yourself dealing with unusual / claustrophobic / gaudy sleeping arrangements this Christmas Eve, share a picture with the world. Use the hashtag (with capitalisation) and cc me if you can be bothered.
December 24, 2025 at 7:35 PM
Using X to try and put forward a left or even centre point of view in politics is like trying to influence the country via the letters page of the Daily Mail.
December 21, 2025 at 3:23 PM
Facebook memories reminded me that this happened 5 years ago today. The last piece of advice remains sensible
December 20, 2025 at 7:16 PM
Well excuse me for trying something new for Christmas dinner
December 19, 2025 at 8:59 PM
After the latest Epstein release I wonder if any work of art has ever been so traduced, distorted and misunderstood as Nabokov’s Lolita? “Born In the USA” might come close, but not in such a horrific way…
December 19, 2025 at 8:52 PM
Australia are just a better team. But also England have royally screwed this up and it’s wildly disappointing but not that surprising. A combination of emotions I’ve been getting very used to in recent years. #Ashes
December 18, 2025 at 9:01 AM
After Snicko has admitted there was an operator error for the Carey edge, presumably that means England should get one extra life in their innings? #ashes
December 17, 2025 at 11:18 AM
Found myself watching a few minutes of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives (against my will) and it made me profoundly miss TV Burp. Harry would have done hilarious things with it
December 16, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
Trump sues the BBC is the stupidest story ever

Of course, cover it but please, please point out - early - how stupid it is.

And don’t put it at the top of the news. Because it’s really, really stupid.
December 16, 2025 at 8:06 AM
Reposted by Matt Green
Trump sues Everybody!
November 11, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
Nobody in The Moral Maze gets eaten by the Moral Minotaur, which is a fundamental flaw in the programme.
December 15, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
Proud to announce my new feature documentary 'TINKY WINKY: MY STORY' will be premiering on Sunday 11th January at The Phoenix Cinema at midday.

The screening will be followed by a Q&A with the star.

Book now.

www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/tinky-wink...
Tinky Winky: My Story - Movie Premiere
Feature documentary about Dave Thompson who played the first Tinky Winky in The Teletubbies. Followed by a Q&A with cast and director.
www.eventbrite.co.uk
December 15, 2025 at 8:21 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
not the kind of behavior I expect from the winner of the fifa peace prize
December 15, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
🎄 It’s our End of Year But Your Emails Special this week – so get your questions in for the panel.
🎅 Anything from hardcore politics to the strange and sublime… it’s all down to your imagination.
🎁 Free to everyone, not just Patreons. Find out how to ask your here: www.patreon.com/posts/145703...
December 15, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Reposted by Matt Green
—I’ve been asked to baptise the King of Spain’s daughter
—Infanta?
—No, holy water as usual. Weird thing to ask honestly
December 15, 2025 at 1:08 PM
Horrible news all over the place at the moment so how about a totally inconsequential conversation? I’m cooking Xmas dinner this year and have had various food requests from family members including onion rings. I’ve never heard of this being a Xmas thing. What are your unusual Xmas food traditions?
December 15, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Reposted by Matt Green
There are MPs still interacting with the far right on X. A platform designed and run to undermine the UK and to shatter its values with hatred and violence. They're talking to people who want to deport them and who despise every word they say - and let's face it, don't believe they have any rights.
December 14, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Found the perfect gift for someone you don’t like
December 14, 2025 at 12:57 PM
Just awful news from Bondi Beach. Antisemitism is an evil that continues to thrive. My thoughts are with all of my Jewish friends and the whole Jewish community at this horrible time.
December 14, 2025 at 11:41 AM
My phone just reminded me that exactly 3 years ago I was doing a charity gig in a restaurant for a footballer who I didn’t really know but turned out to be quite famous actually
December 13, 2025 at 11:25 AM
Reposted by Matt Green
🇪🇺 NEW EPISODE 🇪🇺 The full horror of Trump’s anti-European “Security Strategy”… Can politics be made TOO simple?… and why Netflix wants to kill cinema.
🎙️ With @mattgreencomedy.com @jasonhazeley.bsky.social @hannahfearn.bsky.social & @jonnelledge.bsky.social
🔉 Listen up linktr.ee/ohgodwhatnow...
December 12, 2025 at 10:20 AM
You’re all managers?

Meeting an office party at The 99 Club…

www.99clubcomedy.com
December 11, 2025 at 2:10 PM
Thank you to everyone who came to my Zoom show last week - as a Christmas treat I'm making the recording available to watch to all of my Ko-Fi supporters for a limited time. So if you're a regular supporter or just fancy seeing what you missed, you can catch up here: ko-fi.com/post/Zoom-sh...
Zoom show recording
Matt Green published a supporter-only post on Ko-fi!
ko-fi.com
December 11, 2025 at 10:57 AM
Reposted by Matt Green
White House Begins Christmas Season With Ceremonial Lighting Of Cross
December 10, 2025 at 10:00 PM