Mark Karayan
markkarayan.bsky.social
Mark Karayan
@markkarayan.bsky.social
Comms Lead for Google Threat Intelligence
Might be one of the funniest lines written in sports journalism:

"Off-ice officials realized that Mikkola couldn't have had an assist on the play -- since he had been ejected earlier in the period."
www.espn.com/nhl/story/_/...
Lightning, Panthers net 312 PIM in preseason tilt
In a wild end to the NHL preseason schedule for a pair of bitter rivals, the Panthers defeated the Lightning 7-0 in a memorable matchup in which 65 penalties were called, totaling 312 minutes on the f...
www.espn.com
October 6, 2025 at 7:41 PM
Is it time to rename the "Streisand effect" to the "Kimmel effect"?
#BREAKING: Jimmy Kimmel Live soars to 6.26 million viewers on ABC, network says, citing preliminary data from Nielsen. The actual number of viewers will likely be higher when finalized Nielsen data is released later this week.

It was the highest-rated episode of Kimmel's show since 2015.
September 24, 2025 at 10:26 PM
Breweries in every state need to collaborate to sell 12-packs, each containing their respective seasonal pumpkin beer, and brand it as a “pumpkin patch”.
September 14, 2025 at 10:39 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
I want a girl with a short skirt and a
September 4, 2025 at 5:56 AM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
This is also what junior Mandiant analysts say when they're being briefed on graduated threat groups.
Me: These people, they are your family. This is your history. Your past is your future. This is what has made you the person you are. This is what you will pass on to your children. This is your legacy.

My children: look at all these uncs
August 19, 2025 at 1:16 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
"It's not MSNBC anymore, Lemon. It's MS NOW. We bought the name off of a defunct multiple sclerosis awareness organization. It wasn't cheap, but we were able to save some money by selling Brian Williams to a Saudi prince who wanted to expand his harem."
August 18, 2025 at 2:18 PM
We going to get an explanation on why half of Section 8 and all of Section 9 in Article 1 was removed from the online version of the U.S. Constitution on the Congress.gov site?

Would love to see @politico.com or someone look into this

web.archive.org/web/diff/202...
Wayback Machine
web.archive.org
August 6, 2025 at 2:35 PM
When the DnD party consisting of knights and Paladins rolls through town
so someone broke into my apartment at night and stole all of my swords and im kind of. in shock
July 31, 2025 at 2:52 PM
VPN providers today
July 25, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
Consider, your Honor, that my client was being extremely productive at the time of the crash.
July 24, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
🔴SharePoint vulnerability update: "We assess that at least one of the actors responsible for this early exploitation is a China-nexus threat actor," Mandiant/Google Cloud CTO Charles Carmakal says in a statement sent to me just now.

My earlier reporting:
www.nextgov.com/cybersecurit...
July 21, 2025 at 8:57 PM
July 8, 2025 at 10:49 PM
July 2, 2025 at 8:25 PM
Coinbase went full Les Grossman
www.coinbase.com/blog/protect...

"Instead of paying the $20 million ransom, we’re establishing a $20 million reward fund for information leading to the arrest and conviction of the attackers"
May 16, 2025 at 1:35 AM
Tired: White smoke to announce a new Pope

Wired: Catholic Priest DJing EDM to announce a new Pope

www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuoJ...
Padre Guilherme - Cristo Redentor - Rio de Janeiro - Brasil - DJ Set (16.01.2025)
YouTube video by Padre Guilherme
www.youtube.com
May 8, 2025 at 6:32 PM
Missed opportunity from CNN on picking the right photo for this story
www.cnn.com/2025/05/05/w...
May 7, 2025 at 9:20 PM
“So you’re saying less American actors and actresses will travel to France? How very sad for them.” -The French
This is exactly how to respond to Trump. He wants you to be running round frightened of him. A shrug is the best response. And delivering the shrug *from a cocktail party* is 💯.
May 7, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
From his résumé, Thomas from Tennessee looked perfect. A programmer for eight years—and he’d breezed through a coding test.

In reality, Thomas is a North Korean IT worker, one of many deployed to work remotely for US companies in a global cybercrime op to bankroll the North Korean government.
Your Favorite New Coworker Is an AI-Enhanced Operative From North Korea
For years, North Korea has been secretly placing young IT workers inside Western companies. With AI, their schemes are now more devious—and effective—than ever.
www.wired.com
May 1, 2025 at 1:37 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
Kim Chaek Uni of Tech. DPRK IT Workers supplying money to sanctioned Ryonbong. Client countries: US,UK, JP, UA, CN, BR.

Cha Gang Song
JangMyongSong
KimMunSong
Li Song Ryong
Mun Ri Yong
Kim Su Jin
Choe Song Guk
Paek Myong Ho
Paek Choe Hyon
Pyo Se Il
Cha Gang Song
home.treasury.gov/news/press-r...
Treasury Sanctions North Korean Overseas Representatives, Shipping Companies, and Chinese Entities Supporting the Kim Regime
WASHINGTON – The U.S. Department of the Treasury's Office of Foreign Assets Control (OFAC) today sanctioned nine entities, 16 individuals, and six vessels in response to North Korea's ongoing developm...
home.treasury.gov
April 21, 2025 at 11:06 PM
My favorite Pope history is that of Celestine V, who was unwillingly elected as Pope after he sent a letter to the Cardinals essentially telling them to hurry it the fuck up with selecting a new Pope (they had reached an impasse for 2 years).
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Ce...
Pope Celestine V - Wikipedia
en.wikipedia.org
April 21, 2025 at 6:19 PM
The first two episodes of season 2 of The Last of Us is already better than the entire last season of Game of Thrones.
April 21, 2025 at 5:43 AM
I feel like a North Korean IT Worker being employed by the FAA for a few months should be making bigger headlines.

Yes, THAT FAA.

All thanks to a Facilitator in Maryland.
CC @dustinvolz.bsky.social
April 18, 2025 at 4:57 PM
Reposted by Mark Karayan
So I stuck up for Sean Plankey as future CISA, now time to stick up for Chris Krebs, past CISA - this shit is bonkers and should give pause to anyone even considering federal employment if this kind of shit is what you get for doing your job:
www.whitehouse.gov/fact-sheets/...
Fact Sheet: President Donald J. Trump Addresses Risks from Chris Krebs and Government Censorship
RESTORING TRUST IN GOVERNMENT: Today, President Donald J. Trump signed a Presidential Memorandum revoking any active security clearance held by Chris
www.whitehouse.gov
April 9, 2025 at 9:40 PM