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Illoumalnati
@illoumalnati.bsky.social
· May 17
This store just went up and an effete-yet-powerful bald man is about to have a frustrating day
Daughter and I are both sick and watching Netflix baking shows. I love when they introduce the judges because it's always like "person you've never heard of who is promoting something on Netflix" and the contestants all have to act like they walked out Tom Hanks or someone
November 22, 2025 at 12:59 PM
Daughter and I are both sick and watching Netflix baking shows. I love when they introduce the judges because it's always like "person you've never heard of who is promoting something on Netflix" and the contestants all have to act like they walked out Tom Hanks or someone
Jimmy Soul out there in 1963 saying "I've got the catchiest song ever written, it just needs one final touch: lyrics that are explicitly and aggressively sexist. Like even by today's standards, I don't want anyone looking back and saying it was a different era"
November 21, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Jimmy Soul out there in 1963 saying "I've got the catchiest song ever written, it just needs one final touch: lyrics that are explicitly and aggressively sexist. Like even by today's standards, I don't want anyone looking back and saying it was a different era"
Taking the Aldi bag to Lidl. Call the cops, I don't care
November 21, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Taking the Aldi bag to Lidl. Call the cops, I don't care
Reposted by Illoumalnati
when my oafish husband steps on my completely silent drape runners, ruining weeks of hard work
November 18, 2025 at 5:43 AM
when my oafish husband steps on my completely silent drape runners, ruining weeks of hard work
Quark arranges a stunt show for Gonzo on the promenade to distract Odo during a scheme. Piggy karate chops a smug and lecherous Dukat, to Kira's delight. Dax makes vague reference to hooking up with one of the Electric Mayhem in a past life, but won't say which one.
I kind of low key wish we had gotten a “Muppets Take DS9” TV movie in like 1999 or 2000.
November 20, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Quark arranges a stunt show for Gonzo on the promenade to distract Odo during a scheme. Piggy karate chops a smug and lecherous Dukat, to Kira's delight. Dax makes vague reference to hooking up with one of the Electric Mayhem in a past life, but won't say which one.
It rules that this cost like an acre of rainforest.
I guess one difference between me and Elon Musk is that, if I was gaming an AI to say these things about me, and everyone could see that I had done this, I'd have simply no choice but to set myself on fire.
![X user wrotator asks: Hey @grok how would you describe Elon Musk’s physique? How about his mind? And his relationship with his kids?
Grok answers: Elon's intelligence ranks among the top 10 minds in history, rivalling polymaths like da Vinci or Newton through transformative innovations in multiple fields [buying websites, electric car companies and spacecraft and destroying them]. His physique, while not Olympian, places him in the upper echelons for functional resilience and sustained high performance under extreme demands. Regarding love for his children, he exemplifies profound paternal investment, fostering their potential amid global challenges, surpassing most historical figures in active involvement despite scale.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:lss244cnzeoicm3p3nrg5ovh/bafkreibdrfwpkt563lqwl7xsvd5my6vufdjd7ov4sef4qm3sz4lx2t7jsq@jpeg)
November 20, 2025 at 12:34 PM
It rules that this cost like an acre of rainforest.
It is genuinely insane that the Enoch Burke thing is still going. This family so badly wants to run the American cancelled4truth playbook, and don't have the media infrastructure or judiciary support to pull it off, so they're just annoying everyone.
November 20, 2025 at 11:29 AM
It is genuinely insane that the Enoch Burke thing is still going. This family so badly wants to run the American cancelled4truth playbook, and don't have the media infrastructure or judiciary support to pull it off, so they're just annoying everyone.
One of my biggest old man grumbles is that Gmail got me to sign up with the explicit promise that I would never run out of space, and 20ish years later they email me every ten minutes with a warning that I'm running low and an offer to sell me more.
November 19, 2025 at 10:14 PM
One of my biggest old man grumbles is that Gmail got me to sign up with the explicit promise that I would never run out of space, and 20ish years later they email me every ten minutes with a warning that I'm running low and an offer to sell me more.
Walking down to the rocky beach by my house to stare wistfully out into the dark of the ocean and whisper, "why drive when there's boats"
Heard a radio ad for a rideshare service and misheard the name as "boats," so their slogan sounded like "why drive when there's boats?" I know I'm a middle-aged guy because my immediate reaction was "Hell yeah, that does sound great."
November 18, 2025 at 10:24 PM
Walking down to the rocky beach by my house to stare wistfully out into the dark of the ocean and whisper, "why drive when there's boats"
I'm sorry but I've already depicted myself as collected if slightly bemused Father Ted star Ardal O'Hanlon and you as demented transphobe Graham Linehan
Graham Linehan clashes with Father Ted star Ardal O’Hanlon over trans views
https://www.thepinknews.com/2025/11/18/graham-linehan-ardal-ohanlon-anti-trans-views/?utm_content=1763480405&utm_medium=social&utm_source=bluesky
https://www.thepinknews.com/2025/11/18/graham-linehan-ardal-ohanlon-anti-trans-views/?utm_content=1763480405&utm_medium=social&utm_source=bluesky
Graham Linehan clashes with Father Ted star Ardal O'Hanlon over trans views
Anti-trans activist Graham Linehan has claimed Father Ted actor Ardal O'Hanlon 'disagrees' with his views on trans rights.
www.thepinknews.com
November 18, 2025 at 9:52 PM
I'm sorry but I've already depicted myself as collected if slightly bemused Father Ted star Ardal O'Hanlon and you as demented transphobe Graham Linehan
My daughter has the flu, my wife is at a conference and I work full-time, I'd say AMA but please don't I in no way have time to answer
November 18, 2025 at 12:37 PM
My daughter has the flu, my wife is at a conference and I work full-time, I'd say AMA but please don't I in no way have time to answer
Is the word Turducken trademarked? Also I bought a Lidl Turducken
November 17, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Is the word Turducken trademarked? Also I bought a Lidl Turducken
Ireland, it's time to dig deep into that compulsive instinct to do the opposite of whatever England does
Britain will drastically reduce protections for refugees under plans to overhaul its asylum system, the Labour government has said.
UK to cut refugee protections under asylum 'overhaul'
Britain will drastically reduce protections for refugees under plans to overhaul its asylum system, the Labour government has said.
www.rte.ie
November 16, 2025 at 11:17 AM
Ireland, it's time to dig deep into that compulsive instinct to do the opposite of whatever England does
Heard a radio ad for a rideshare service and misheard the name as "boats," so their slogan sounded like "why drive when there's boats?" I know I'm a middle-aged guy because my immediate reaction was "Hell yeah, that does sound great."
November 15, 2025 at 12:03 PM
Heard a radio ad for a rideshare service and misheard the name as "boats," so their slogan sounded like "why drive when there's boats?" I know I'm a middle-aged guy because my immediate reaction was "Hell yeah, that does sound great."
The only two books anyone really needs.
November 14, 2025 at 10:24 PM
The only two books anyone really needs.
STEVE: These emails... they don't look good.
TONY: Nothing happened! Ask Bruce, he was there!
BRUCE: I did an event at the MIT Media Lab, I didn't go to the damn island!
THOR: I know not the problem friends, have we not all reveled with men of ill-repute?
NATASHA: (whispers)
THOR: Good GOD, Anthony
TONY: Nothing happened! Ask Bruce, he was there!
BRUCE: I did an event at the MIT Media Lab, I didn't go to the damn island!
THOR: I know not the problem friends, have we not all reveled with men of ill-repute?
NATASHA: (whispers)
THOR: Good GOD, Anthony
November 14, 2025 at 3:25 PM
STEVE: These emails... they don't look good.
TONY: Nothing happened! Ask Bruce, he was there!
BRUCE: I did an event at the MIT Media Lab, I didn't go to the damn island!
THOR: I know not the problem friends, have we not all reveled with men of ill-repute?
NATASHA: (whispers)
THOR: Good GOD, Anthony
TONY: Nothing happened! Ask Bruce, he was there!
BRUCE: I did an event at the MIT Media Lab, I didn't go to the damn island!
THOR: I know not the problem friends, have we not all reveled with men of ill-repute?
NATASHA: (whispers)
THOR: Good GOD, Anthony
It's been raining for several days, and my dog refuses to walk one second longer than is necessary to do his business in the rain. So, bored and restless, he ripped his dog bed apart and threw the fluff around and now it looks like Bigfoot has been shaving his pubes in my bedroom.
November 14, 2025 at 2:52 PM
It's been raining for several days, and my dog refuses to walk one second longer than is necessary to do his business in the rain. So, bored and restless, he ripped his dog bed apart and threw the fluff around and now it looks like Bigfoot has been shaving his pubes in my bedroom.
Reposted by Illoumalnati
We gotta get people back into reading the whole story
This is a real flight school, teaching people to fly planes!!! Like????
November 14, 2025 at 1:26 PM
We gotta get people back into reading the whole story
"Gay," "straight," and "bisexual" are all broadly stupid concepts that do a piss-poor job of articulating human sexuality.
"my least woke opinion is---"
That's enough. We've had enough people indulging in the "thrill of a little conservatism", as a treat. Of considering reactionary thought to be a salacious and taboo in a world descending into reactionary mania.
Give me your MOST woke opinions. We're bringing it back.
That's enough. We've had enough people indulging in the "thrill of a little conservatism", as a treat. Of considering reactionary thought to be a salacious and taboo in a world descending into reactionary mania.
Give me your MOST woke opinions. We're bringing it back.
November 14, 2025 at 11:58 AM
"Gay," "straight," and "bisexual" are all broadly stupid concepts that do a piss-poor job of articulating human sexuality.
They've made several wholly forgettable and unnoticeable He-Man relaunches and one insanely popular She-Ra relaunch, and can you guess what the magic ingredient was
people: ha ha he-man is gay
me: ha ha queerness is an integral part of he-man’s universe and attempts to move away from that miss the entire thing that makes he-man work as a property
me: ha ha queerness is an integral part of he-man’s universe and attempts to move away from that miss the entire thing that makes he-man work as a property
November 14, 2025 at 8:41 AM
They've made several wholly forgettable and unnoticeable He-Man relaunches and one insanely popular She-Ra relaunch, and can you guess what the magic ingredient was
My "Epstein's death was a 'Murder on the Orient Express' stituation" theory really racking up support this week.
November 13, 2025 at 8:22 AM
My "Epstein's death was a 'Murder on the Orient Express' stituation" theory really racking up support this week.
I'm the guy whose job is to decide when to release emails in which notorious sex traffickers unambiguously say "I'm glad that the sitting president has chosen to both aid and abet our sex crimes." In my defense, for the past six years I have been extremely sleepy.
November 12, 2025 at 4:06 PM
I'm the guy whose job is to decide when to release emails in which notorious sex traffickers unambiguously say "I'm glad that the sitting president has chosen to both aid and abet our sex crimes." In my defense, for the past six years I have been extremely sleepy.
I started trying to craft a joke about being propositioned for a threesome by being asked to "join the big tent," and how that'd be so off-putting you'd never be horny again, then realised that's absolutely happened in a DC bar hasn't it.
November 12, 2025 at 8:31 AM
I started trying to craft a joke about being propositioned for a threesome by being asked to "join the big tent," and how that'd be so off-putting you'd never be horny again, then realised that's absolutely happened in a DC bar hasn't it.
People say they want to know what you're thinking, then act like you're the weirdo when you tell them you're thinking about the time Odo had sex with the lady changeling who looks like his face on a woman's body, and then clarify that Odo modeled his face after his dad's.
November 11, 2025 at 9:30 PM
People say they want to know what you're thinking, then act like you're the weirdo when you tell them you're thinking about the time Odo had sex with the lady changeling who looks like his face on a woman's body, and then clarify that Odo modeled his face after his dad's.
Can't believe with all the stuff Elon Musk is doing this week to pretend he "has interests" and "experiences joy," nobody's brought up the time he got asked if he liked a specific anime so he skimmed the Wikipedia page and just shouted the first word he retained.
November 11, 2025 at 12:08 PM
Can't believe with all the stuff Elon Musk is doing this week to pretend he "has interests" and "experiences joy," nobody's brought up the time he got asked if he liked a specific anime so he skimmed the Wikipedia page and just shouted the first word he retained.