Chris Scott
@iamchrisscott.bsky.social
ClickHole contributor. Writer. Person. An actual human being. In DC. chrisscottwrites.com
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Go Bag ~ by Chris Scott
One gallon of water, one first-aid kit, one pocket knife, two boxes of granola bars, three pouches of pre-cooked rice and beans, two hundred dollars in cash, toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, hand sani…
milkcandyreview.home.blog
I have some new very short prose in the always-amazing Milk Candy Review today. For anyone who enjoys a good list.
Throwing my hat in the ring with a submission in a bit, and donated to DC Migrant Solidarity Mutual Aid www.dcmigrantmutualaid.org. Everyone get in on this one.
Happy HAD Friday! 2 submission windows today for those who make some kind of donation to a cause! Link will work from 10-11am and 7-8pm Eastern. Where are you donating? havehashad.submittable.com/submit/34166...
November 14, 2025 at 11:37 PM
Throwing my hat in the ring with a submission in a bit, and donated to DC Migrant Solidarity Mutual Aid www.dcmigrantmutualaid.org. Everyone get in on this one.
Spent 10 dollars on bingo cards and won a 25 dollar gift certificate after an hour of play. That’s a 15 dollar profit, just in one night. This is alpha behavior. I am an alpha.
November 14, 2025 at 10:14 PM
Spent 10 dollars on bingo cards and won a 25 dollar gift certificate after an hour of play. That’s a 15 dollar profit, just in one night. This is alpha behavior. I am an alpha.
First time writing the word “caution” on a finite surface. How’d I do?
November 14, 2025 at 7:02 PM
First time writing the word “caution” on a finite surface. How’d I do?
Truly wild how much of my life has been spent wallowing in self doubt and endless critiques of every little choice I’ve ever made when every day I’m subjected to the absolute most shameless people who have ever existed
you can’t be putting this in the paper (gift link but i do not recommend you use it www.nytimes.com/2025/11/14/s...)
November 14, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Truly wild how much of my life has been spent wallowing in self doubt and endless critiques of every little choice I’ve ever made when every day I’m subjected to the absolute most shameless people who have ever existed
Writers doing eligibility posts need to instead consider if they're eligible for heaven
November 14, 2025 at 2:40 PM
Writers doing eligibility posts need to instead consider if they're eligible for heaven
Thrilled to announce the White House has asked me to come up with an unemployment rate for this month. It’s probably like 5% or something? Ballpark. Anyway, feel free to put that in the news. Cheers.
November 13, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Thrilled to announce the White House has asked me to come up with an unemployment rate for this month. It’s probably like 5% or something? Ballpark. Anyway, feel free to put that in the news. Cheers.
Reposted by Chris Scott
Flash fiction "Tough Guys" by Myna Chang
“She shoves my tie aside, taps a button mid-chest with the blade, tap tap tap. Who is this bitch? She’s grinning again, all teeth, and she smells like copper, like old pennies…”
www.bloodhoneylit.com/fiction/toug...
“She shoves my tie aside, taps a button mid-chest with the blade, tap tap tap. Who is this bitch? She’s grinning again, all teeth, and she smells like copper, like old pennies…”
www.bloodhoneylit.com/fiction/toug...
tough guys — Blood+Honey
by Myna Chang “She shoves my tie aside, taps a button mid-chest with the blade, tap tap tap . Who is this bitch? She’s grinning again, all teeth, and she smells like copper, like old pennies…”
www.bloodhoneylit.com
November 13, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Harry Enten is simultaneously too young and too old to be saying "my goodness gracious" as frequently as he does. A hideous uncanny valley of a catchphrase. Everything about this guy gives me the heebie jeebies.
Enten: "Trump is 39 below water on the Epstein case. 39 points in the negative! My goodness gracious. What Trump has been selling on the Epstein files, the Epstein case, the American people have not been buying at all ... less than half of Republicans are buying it. This is his worst issue by far"
November 13, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Harry Enten is simultaneously too young and too old to be saying "my goodness gracious" as frequently as he does. A hideous uncanny valley of a catchphrase. Everything about this guy gives me the heebie jeebies.
Wildest time at the movies this year was the part in Jurassic World Rebirth where everything stops so Scarlett Johansson's and Mahershala Ali's characters can trauma dump at each other for like 5 minutes out of nowhere and then it gets right back to the dinosaurs. Thought I was hallucinating.
November 13, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Wildest time at the movies this year was the part in Jurassic World Rebirth where everything stops so Scarlett Johansson's and Mahershala Ali's characters can trauma dump at each other for like 5 minutes out of nowhere and then it gets right back to the dinosaurs. Thought I was hallucinating.
I’m the guy who keeps telling them to make more Now You See Me movies
November 12, 2025 at 5:18 PM
I’m the guy who keeps telling them to make more Now You See Me movies
The northern lights look absolutely stunning on my phone
November 12, 2025 at 2:50 AM
The northern lights look absolutely stunning on my phone
This shit is the worst thing that’s happened to horror in 30 years. I cannot understand the psychology of horror fans who get excited about this stuff. There’s like 5 of these coming out every week now.
November 12, 2025 at 12:33 AM
This shit is the worst thing that’s happened to horror in 30 years. I cannot understand the psychology of horror fans who get excited about this stuff. There’s like 5 of these coming out every week now.
Reposted by Chris Scott
I’m real proud of this one, y’all
"People are always coming up with new ways for whales to die. Been at it long enough, starting with sharpened sticks and then boats were invented which was some bad luck for whales, and then the boats got harpoons..."
New story from @jessdawn.bsky.social on Short Story, Long today!!
New story from @jessdawn.bsky.social on Short Story, Long today!!
“Whippomorpha” by Jessica Dawn
“If there’s nothing to fight over, most of getting divorced is just waiting. Nothing worth fighting over, Janna decided a while ago. Best to just let it go.”
ashortstorylong.substack.com
November 11, 2025 at 5:08 PM
I’m real proud of this one, y’all
I don't read a ton of magical realism but I thought Karen Russell's The Antidote was pretty gorgeous, with an ending that truly snuck up on me
November 11, 2025 at 8:01 PM
I don't read a ton of magical realism but I thought Karen Russell's The Antidote was pretty gorgeous, with an ending that truly snuck up on me
If there’s one thing we all know about this guy (who rocks, by the way) it’s that he has no tolerance for complainers
Trump: "If we die, we must die and we as men we die without complaining."
November 11, 2025 at 6:59 PM
If there’s one thing we all know about this guy (who rocks, by the way) it’s that he has no tolerance for complainers
Reposted by Chris Scott
I haven't been on here much lately but I wanted to share a new piece called At SeaTac. It's out today in the first issue of Twisted Tongue Press. They've been great to work with and everything looks beautiful and this issue has some real heaters. Thanks!
twistedtonguepress.com/fiction/atse...
twistedtonguepress.com/fiction/atse...
November 11, 2025 at 6:28 PM
I haven't been on here much lately but I wanted to share a new piece called At SeaTac. It's out today in the first issue of Twisted Tongue Press. They've been great to work with and everything looks beautiful and this issue has some real heaters. Thanks!
twistedtonguepress.com/fiction/atse...
twistedtonguepress.com/fiction/atse...
Veterans Day is kind of the perfect storm for Facebook boomers who absolutely cannot distinguish between AI slop and actual photographs
November 11, 2025 at 3:42 PM
Veterans Day is kind of the perfect storm for Facebook boomers who absolutely cannot distinguish between AI slop and actual photographs
We were this close to getting Hakeem Jeffries to say “dry dick randos” on camera
Jeffries: “Nobody who's serious in this country takes Dr. Oz seriously…I'm not going to respond to any comments from randos like Dr. Oz, who is woefully unqualified to be in whatever position he holds in the administration. He's a joke. These people are all jokes.”
November 10, 2025 at 6:03 PM
We were this close to getting Hakeem Jeffries to say “dry dick randos” on camera
Performative lunch
November 10, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Performative lunch
Lowkey side eye at my 6-year-old who told me yesterday he loves learning how to read because “every book is a new adventure.” Nice try dude. You will be getting a Nintendo Switch for Christmas like all the other kids.
November 10, 2025 at 3:18 PM
Lowkey side eye at my 6-year-old who told me yesterday he loves learning how to read because “every book is a new adventure.” Nice try dude. You will be getting a Nintendo Switch for Christmas like all the other kids.
Classing up all the traffic cones in my neighborhood by painting them black
November 10, 2025 at 2:52 PM
Classing up all the traffic cones in my neighborhood by painting them black
Senate Dems are caving so they can hurry home to see the new terrifying nightmare from the twisted mind of Osgood Perkins
November 10, 2025 at 12:26 AM
Senate Dems are caving so they can hurry home to see the new terrifying nightmare from the twisted mind of Osgood Perkins
There were two guys hotter than me in yoga class today. Not great but not terrible.
November 9, 2025 at 5:38 PM
There were two guys hotter than me in yoga class today. Not great but not terrible.
Interesting how closely Guillermo del Toro's monster in Frankenstein (aka The Modern Prometheus) resembles the engineers in Ridley Scott's Prometheus, also given that he'd planned to adapt Lovecraft's At the Mountains of Madness, but abandoned it after seeing how closely Prometheus resembled it
November 9, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Interesting how closely Guillermo del Toro's monster in Frankenstein (aka The Modern Prometheus) resembles the engineers in Ridley Scott's Prometheus, also given that he'd planned to adapt Lovecraft's At the Mountains of Madness, but abandoned it after seeing how closely Prometheus resembled it
I had a dream last night I was given the tagline for a potential movie and had to write an entire screenplay around the tagline which was, no shit, “The worst day of your life is about to get a whole lot stickier.”
November 9, 2025 at 3:16 PM
I had a dream last night I was given the tagline for a potential movie and had to write an entire screenplay around the tagline which was, no shit, “The worst day of your life is about to get a whole lot stickier.”