Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
@buffalojilll.bsky.social
33. Buffalover living in CO. Hozier devotee. If you ever speak to me in Spanish please use the formal usted.
It's just tooooooo much work to find all the people I follow on twitterrrrr I don't waaaannnaaa
November 10, 2024 at 1:14 AM
It's just tooooooo much work to find all the people I follow on twitterrrrr I don't waaaannnaaa
Man getting a lot of followers lately does that mean I have to post here lol
November 9, 2024 at 5:59 PM
Man getting a lot of followers lately does that mean I have to post here lol
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
weed, sluts, bitches, jesus. long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. then, everything changed when the jesus nation attacked.
August 3, 2023 at 3:25 PM
weed, sluts, bitches, jesus. long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. then, everything changed when the jesus nation attacked.
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
me when anyone i know wears a red shirt
July 6, 2023 at 9:23 PM
me when anyone i know wears a red shirt
So do I just post everything I post on Twitter here orrrrrr...? Wanna build this up but am also bored to death here??? Help
July 6, 2023 at 9:30 PM
So do I just post everything I post on Twitter here orrrrrr...? Wanna build this up but am also bored to death here??? Help
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
the Lord is my shepherd, He shaves my entire body to make sweaters
June 11, 2023 at 4:58 PM
the Lord is my shepherd, He shaves my entire body to make sweaters
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
[first day at Domino's]
Manager: oh and one more thing: don't fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don't fuck them
Cook: dont fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I'm n-
Customer: that guy's not gonna fuck my pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his job he wont.
Manager: oh and one more thing: don't fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don't fuck them
Cook: dont fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I'm n-
Customer: that guy's not gonna fuck my pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his job he wont.
July 4, 2023 at 5:20 AM
[first day at Domino's]
Manager: oh and one more thing: don't fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don't fuck them
Cook: dont fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I'm n-
Customer: that guy's not gonna fuck my pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his job he wont.
Manager: oh and one more thing: don't fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don't fuck them
Cook: dont fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I'm n-
Customer: that guy's not gonna fuck my pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his job he wont.
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
[At the Rumble]
her *aggressively taking off earrings and heels*
me *desperately trying to find somewhere to set down my ice cream cone*
her *aggressively taking off earrings and heels*
me *desperately trying to find somewhere to set down my ice cream cone*
July 2, 2023 at 1:56 PM
[At the Rumble]
her *aggressively taking off earrings and heels*
me *desperately trying to find somewhere to set down my ice cream cone*
her *aggressively taking off earrings and heels*
me *desperately trying to find somewhere to set down my ice cream cone*
Nobody:
Michael Kors on project runway: she looks like a slutty sushi roll
Michael Kors on project runway: she looks like a slutty sushi roll
July 2, 2023 at 7:24 PM
Nobody:
Michael Kors on project runway: she looks like a slutty sushi roll
Michael Kors on project runway: she looks like a slutty sushi roll
Reposted by Discount🍋Emma🍋Stone
went over to twitter to get the last of my things and elon was just eating cereal out of a frying pan
April 29, 2023 at 7:53 PM
went over to twitter to get the last of my things and elon was just eating cereal out of a frying pan
Shameless promotion
July 1, 2023 at 11:54 PM
Shameless promotion
Me, to my sim: why are you putting your dish on the coffee table?? The dishwasher is RIGHT THERE
My sim, *breaking the fourth wall and looking right at me*: you fucking hypocrite
My sim, *breaking the fourth wall and looking right at me*: you fucking hypocrite
July 1, 2023 at 11:35 PM
Me, to my sim: why are you putting your dish on the coffee table?? The dishwasher is RIGHT THERE
My sim, *breaking the fourth wall and looking right at me*: you fucking hypocrite
My sim, *breaking the fourth wall and looking right at me*: you fucking hypocrite
[First date]
Him: so tell me about your job
Me: I'm a nurse *pulling laptop from seemingly nowhere* wanna see my house on the Sims?
Him: so tell me about your job
Me: I'm a nurse *pulling laptop from seemingly nowhere* wanna see my house on the Sims?
July 1, 2023 at 11:35 PM
[First date]
Him: so tell me about your job
Me: I'm a nurse *pulling laptop from seemingly nowhere* wanna see my house on the Sims?
Him: so tell me about your job
Me: I'm a nurse *pulling laptop from seemingly nowhere* wanna see my house on the Sims?
Video game exec: okay we need an animal to portray the lead character, whose only defining quality is that it's REALLY REALLY FAST
Brenda: Cheetah?
Exec: fuck no Brenda
Todd, who wasn't listening: *mouth full of milk duds* hedgehog.
Exec: GODDAMN PERFECT Todd
Brenda: Cheetah?
Exec: fuck no Brenda
Todd, who wasn't listening: *mouth full of milk duds* hedgehog.
Exec: GODDAMN PERFECT Todd
July 1, 2023 at 11:31 PM
Video game exec: okay we need an animal to portray the lead character, whose only defining quality is that it's REALLY REALLY FAST
Brenda: Cheetah?
Exec: fuck no Brenda
Todd, who wasn't listening: *mouth full of milk duds* hedgehog.
Exec: GODDAMN PERFECT Todd
Brenda: Cheetah?
Exec: fuck no Brenda
Todd, who wasn't listening: *mouth full of milk duds* hedgehog.
Exec: GODDAMN PERFECT Todd
Sonic Thee Hedgehog
July 1, 2023 at 11:30 PM
Sonic Thee Hedgehog
Me: there's just no way you ONLY have air conditioners
Lowes employee: *visibly uncomfortable*
Me: here's the thing Curp
Lowes employee: it's Curt
Me: here's the thing Curd. I'm gonna need you to show me where the air shampoos are
Lowes employee: *visibly uncomfortable*
Me: here's the thing Curp
Lowes employee: it's Curt
Me: here's the thing Curd. I'm gonna need you to show me where the air shampoos are
July 1, 2023 at 11:29 PM
Me: there's just no way you ONLY have air conditioners
Lowes employee: *visibly uncomfortable*
Me: here's the thing Curp
Lowes employee: it's Curt
Me: here's the thing Curd. I'm gonna need you to show me where the air shampoos are
Lowes employee: *visibly uncomfortable*
Me: here's the thing Curp
Lowes employee: it's Curt
Me: here's the thing Curd. I'm gonna need you to show me where the air shampoos are
Maybe I'll take this opportunity of starting over to actually try and be funny again 🤷🏼♀️
July 1, 2023 at 11:16 PM
Maybe I'll take this opportunity of starting over to actually try and be funny again 🤷🏼♀️
[1st night of a boyfriend sleeping over]
Me: I sleep with a sound machine, that ok?
Him: ya that's fine!
*I reach over & hit a button. The part in Hey Ya where he repeats "alright alright alright alright" starts to play on a loop*
Me *snuggles covers up to chin*: night babe
Me: I sleep with a sound machine, that ok?
Him: ya that's fine!
*I reach over & hit a button. The part in Hey Ya where he repeats "alright alright alright alright" starts to play on a loop*
Me *snuggles covers up to chin*: night babe
July 1, 2023 at 11:14 PM
[1st night of a boyfriend sleeping over]
Me: I sleep with a sound machine, that ok?
Him: ya that's fine!
*I reach over & hit a button. The part in Hey Ya where he repeats "alright alright alright alright" starts to play on a loop*
Me *snuggles covers up to chin*: night babe
Me: I sleep with a sound machine, that ok?
Him: ya that's fine!
*I reach over & hit a button. The part in Hey Ya where he repeats "alright alright alright alright" starts to play on a loop*
Me *snuggles covers up to chin*: night babe
One time I clicked my car fob unlock button at an elevator instead of pushing the button to summon it, but I'll still never be as dumb as Elon Musk
July 1, 2023 at 11:10 PM
One time I clicked my car fob unlock button at an elevator instead of pushing the button to summon it, but I'll still never be as dumb as Elon Musk