Brandon
@brandonchristensen.bsky.social
Amateur cryptozoologist, Distiller / Spirits enthusiast, TTRPG player, Twin dad
Pinned
Reposted by Brandon
Reposted by Brandon
Hell yeah she used Bene Gesserit voice on him
Octogenarian Mitch McConnell falls over when being asked about ICE
October 16, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Hell yeah she used Bene Gesserit voice on him
Reposted by Brandon
hell? yea, brother
July 24, 2025 at 3:54 PM
hell? yea, brother
Call us Cedric and Omar because we are at the drive in.
July 19, 2025 at 10:51 PM
Call us Cedric and Omar because we are at the drive in.
Why is steak the only meat that gets its own house? Why not a pork house or chicken house?
July 18, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Why is steak the only meat that gets its own house? Why not a pork house or chicken house?
Reposted by Brandon
the kiss cam at the Coldplay concert lands on me and I'm just absolutely housing a giant Italian sub sandwich
July 18, 2025 at 11:13 AM
the kiss cam at the Coldplay concert lands on me and I'm just absolutely housing a giant Italian sub sandwich
Thinking about becoming a weeb but for the Czech Republic.
June 23, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Thinking about becoming a weeb but for the Czech Republic.
I saw Monstro Elisasue at the beach yesterday. Stars are just like us.
June 22, 2025 at 2:16 PM
I saw Monstro Elisasue at the beach yesterday. Stars are just like us.
Is twink short for twinkle toes?
June 22, 2025 at 12:27 PM
Is twink short for twinkle toes?
My six year old got his girlfriend’s phone number on the last day of school. Beat me by like a decade.
June 20, 2025 at 7:27 PM
My six year old got his girlfriend’s phone number on the last day of school. Beat me by like a decade.
Finally did my taxes
a pink cartoon character is sitting on the ground with its mouth open and making a funny face .
ALT: a pink cartoon character is sitting on the ground with its mouth open and making a funny face .
media.tenor.com
June 19, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Finally did my taxes
You’re telling me a pork fried this rice?
June 12, 2025 at 4:45 PM
You’re telling me a pork fried this rice?
Kinda weird that there is a good Wonder Woman with all correct opinions and then a Bizarro one.
Reminder that I AM LATINA AND PROUD. I am the product of immigration - my grandmother was undocumented and entered the country from Mexico as a baby. My mother was a fierce, gorgeous Latina woman of Mexican and Spanish descent.
June 12, 2025 at 9:27 AM
Kinda weird that there is a good Wonder Woman with all correct opinions and then a Bizarro one.
Reposted by Brandon
lana del rey lyric leak
The cia is my mom & the fbi is my dad & the white house was my baby sitter
June 11, 2025 at 7:46 AM
lana del rey lyric leak
Buying a goldfish at the pet store: paper or plastic?
June 7, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Buying a goldfish at the pet store: paper or plastic?
Thinking about this picture lately for some reason
June 7, 2025 at 9:35 PM
Thinking about this picture lately for some reason
Showing up to dive bars in a full Scuba suit and acting confused.
June 7, 2025 at 11:17 AM
Showing up to dive bars in a full Scuba suit and acting confused.
I need someone to pay for me to study sword smithing under Antonio Arellano Pulgar, the last master swordsmith in Spain.
June 7, 2025 at 12:51 AM
I need someone to pay for me to study sword smithing under Antonio Arellano Pulgar, the last master swordsmith in Spain.
Asked my boss if we could have recess outside today.
June 4, 2025 at 8:58 PM
Asked my boss if we could have recess outside today.
Reposted by Brandon
Me walking out of the bus on MTV’s Next
June 2, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Me walking out of the bus on MTV’s Next
Fuck it, lunch at 8:45 Am
May 30, 2025 at 12:42 PM
Fuck it, lunch at 8:45 Am
The existence of Harambe also implies a Halalbe.
May 29, 2025 at 11:49 PM
The existence of Harambe also implies a Halalbe.
Imagine you show up at the jousting tournament and check who you are going up against and his name is Lance A Lot. That’s like a boxer being named Punch A Bunch.
May 29, 2025 at 8:49 PM
Imagine you show up at the jousting tournament and check who you are going up against and his name is Lance A Lot. That’s like a boxer being named Punch A Bunch.
Make sure you know what kind of dad you have.
May 24, 2025 at 1:25 AM
Make sure you know what kind of dad you have.
Reposted by Brandon
hugh laurie is british for “big truck”
May 22, 2025 at 12:06 AM
hugh laurie is british for “big truck”