Treating myself with a trip to my happy place (the library)

You should get a library card if you don’t have one already. Then get the apps Libby and Hoopla. There you can download audiobooks and ebooks. So even if you don’t go to your local library a lot, you can still support them and the authors you love.

as a society we are losing our sense of whimsy, and the world will be so much better once we fix that

Do not mess with librarians. They let complete strangers borrow their books. For a living. Even the hardcovers. They are so much stronger than you know.

multiple forms of sushi transportation (moat, railroad tracks, conveyer belt) in my home could fix me

Why would you make your narrator unreliable. I trusted you and purchased this book and this is how you repay me

Here is a cockroach that is much better looking and more useful* than the current occupant of the White House.

*Almost all cockroach species are omnivorous critters that break down debris in the environment. They don't invade homes or bother people.

(Anaplecta sp.) Tatama National Park, Colombia