Unholy Crows
@unholycrows.bsky.social
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Mary was actually Italian 🤌
December 26, 2025 at 9:26 PM
Mary was actually Italian 🤌
New favorite headstone
December 26, 2025 at 3:05 AM
New favorite headstone
Your annual reminder that working out today, tomorrow, or Boxing Day burns double the calories.
December 24, 2025 at 3:37 PM
Your annual reminder that working out today, tomorrow, or Boxing Day burns double the calories.
Reposted by Unholy Crows
I like whatever is wrong with my algorithm over there
December 7, 2025 at 3:49 PM
I like whatever is wrong with my algorithm over there
Who wore it better?
December 3, 2025 at 2:55 PM
Who wore it better?
Reposted by Unholy Crows
This gets progressively funnier with every use of the term "floppy".
![One of Britain’s most senior police officers has launched an angry tirade against Extinction Rebellion protesters going “all floppy” when they get arrested.
Sir Stephen House, the deputy commissioner of the Metropolitan police, said the tactic of going limp was a “flipping nuisance” as it required extra officers to drag protesters away.
House told a London assembly police and crime committee hearing: “We have asked them to stop being floppy. And that might seem like a silly thing to say, but when we arrest them and pick them up, they go all floppy, which is why you see four or five officers carrying them away. It’s a complete waste of officers’ time, and a complete pain in the neck.”
Extinction Rebellion: how successful were the latest protests?
Read more
House also expressed annoyance at how the tactic made the police look heavy-handed. He said: “The problem with them going floppy and four offices carrying them away [is that it] looks to the general public like police are overreacting here. We’re not making them go floppy. They’re just sort of being a nuisance.”](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:7uvcqt45oqlutlrtgx7bpodq/bafkreie7yqxb4cj2t4gxftiqsno5wgk2kczb5vbtj7wh2b2u5sjtqtdrku@jpeg)
September 5, 2025 at 8:27 PM
This gets progressively funnier with every use of the term "floppy".
I chart my own path
November 14, 2025 at 7:44 PM
I chart my own path
If you’re an asshole do you call a bidet a shower?
November 5, 2025 at 8:44 PM
If you’re an asshole do you call a bidet a shower?
If I was homeless I’d be begging for THC. CBD’s for labradors on Guy Fawkes.
Have they considered low unemployment, a liveable wage, affordable housing and breaking overpriced supermarket duopolies?
November 5, 2025 at 8:31 PM
If I was homeless I’d be begging for THC. CBD’s for labradors on Guy Fawkes.
Caw caw
November 5, 2025 at 11:51 AM
Caw caw
And that’s why you don’t have bean quesadillas two meals in a row
November 4, 2025 at 5:51 PM
And that’s why you don’t have bean quesadillas two meals in a row
Turning on video to eat a banana
Coming off mute to eat an apple
October 21, 2025 at 8:42 PM
Turning on video to eat a banana
Reposted by Unholy Crows
Why call it "synchronized swimming" when "swimnastics" is right there?!
October 1, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Why call it "synchronized swimming" when "swimnastics" is right there?!
Right, quit the euphemisms and just call it a ‘penis’ already
‘Joystick’ an absolutely insane word imo
September 25, 2025 at 10:15 PM
Right, quit the euphemisms and just call it a ‘penis’ already
Masseuses and masseurs are the only people allowed to use the phrase “press some flesh”
September 23, 2025 at 10:33 PM
Masseuses and masseurs are the only people allowed to use the phrase “press some flesh”
Love hearing Europeans pronounce it "Mog-uh"
September 23, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Love hearing Europeans pronounce it "Mog-uh"
I hope I’m just terribly lazy and not depressed.
I hope I'm depressed and not just terribly lazy.
September 23, 2025 at 8:57 PM
I hope I’m just terribly lazy and not depressed.
I want a Spotify inbox about as much as I want a shared photo album with my nemesis’s proctologist
September 23, 2025 at 7:35 PM
I want a Spotify inbox about as much as I want a shared photo album with my nemesis’s proctologist
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a poster in possession of a pile of hot takes must be in want of a social network upon which to post them.
September 20, 2025 at 2:00 PM
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a poster in possession of a pile of hot takes must be in want of a social network upon which to post them.
I hope your email doesn't find me, period
September 16, 2025 at 3:15 PM
I hope your email doesn't find me, period
If a joke isn’t working out for you, don’t be too proud to give up on it bef
September 16, 2025 at 3:09 PM
If a joke isn’t working out for you, don’t be too proud to give up on it bef
THEM: What's your favorite Rocky movie?
ME: Horror Picture Show.
ME: Horror Picture Show.
September 16, 2025 at 3:02 PM
THEM: What's your favorite Rocky movie?
ME: Horror Picture Show.
ME: Horror Picture Show.