Schmeev
schmeev.bsky.social
Schmeev
@schmeev.bsky.social
Probably cursed, cannot be helped. All pronouns ok, corrections are not chastising.
Pinned
“god youre so tight” i say, attempting to extract a cartridge from my nes
Reposted by Schmeev
and tiny tim, who was NOT in the epstein files,
December 18, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Reposted by Schmeev
Happy 12/16 🎄
December 16, 2025 at 9:12 AM
just finished daikatana. its goofy, its jank, but that wasnt like...a painful experience to get through. i had a good time, and im happy to add it to my list of "widely disparaged games ive played and enjoyed anyway"
December 13, 2025 at 3:43 AM
just starting shiny happy people season 2, kinda makes me glad im so non-committal about stuff. i went to acquire the fire, grew up with audio adrenaline and dc talk, but thankfully never got into the fucked up boot camp fascist shit. still a lil fucked up mentally, but coulda been MUCH worse
December 12, 2025 at 6:47 PM
a metal song thats like a hip hop dance song where they teach you the dance in the lyrics but instead its teaching you how to play the riff
December 12, 2025 at 5:33 PM
camera pans to the french section of the audience:
December 12, 2025 at 2:58 AM
jonathan blow implies the existence of jonathans hand, foot, and tit
December 12, 2025 at 1:53 AM
ive had an unusual number of people suggest i look into gg allin (like 2 people, which is more than the -30 id expect), and i dont expect to ever do so and will retain my assumption that he would have liked fight club in a different yet equally derogatory way to the average fight club liker
December 10, 2025 at 3:34 PM
my dualist kingdom has a big pot of greed where we all combine our nut together throughout november
When you think of it, No Nut November is edgy and harmful bullshit which never should have been invented and any proper dualist movement should seek to abolish it.
December 9, 2025 at 5:17 AM
what do you think its like in the universe where they call them videog ames
December 8, 2025 at 6:03 PM
watching solo for the first time. stormtroopers in a fascist police state doing fascist police state things, families being broken apart, invading people, wreaking havoc in the name of "bringing peace and stability", where have i heard all this stuff...
December 6, 2025 at 6:22 AM
star wars bukkake scene, han shoots first
December 6, 2025 at 5:51 AM
gotta yell about blood whistle again real quick because i just realized the guy gets the blood whistle from a secret toad house, but he gets there through the secret in the first world fortress, which doesnt lead to a toad house, just a room with a level end chest in it. he couldnt describe 1-3???
December 3, 2025 at 4:25 AM
breaking news from @nytimes.com:

6 is more than 3
November 30, 2025 at 5:09 PM
trying to close my fallen comrades eyes with one sweep of my hand but theyre still a little open so i awkwardly shut them one by one and accidentally poke one and get eyeball juice on my hand
November 29, 2025 at 2:06 AM
Reposted by Schmeev
November 21, 2025 at 5:55 AM
we should start calling countries by the names they give themselves. i dunno what every country calls itself, and some leeway for accent is reasonable, but i think its time to make it a thing
November 21, 2025 at 2:59 PM
blood whistle is still a big fave in bad creepypasta, and i kinda wonder if the writer had something in mind that doesnt come through in the writing. it feels like he was intending something more sinister than "I CANT BELIEVE THEY TORTURED MARIO, I CANT TAKE IT"
November 20, 2025 at 6:54 PM
no other animal on the planet knows what murder is either. or dietary supplements. ps5. carpet. cassette player. lobster bisque. magic the gathering. smoke alarm. damn, lotta stuff out there that relies on a shared understanding/cultural context to serve its purpose
Every fucking thing he says flashes the "charlie brown had hoes" tweet into my brain. No it's not, that isn't true.
November 20, 2025 at 3:51 PM
king arthur is supposed to be all wise and shit but after that knight comes all jacked up from the sable knight his lil page guy is like "king, grant me a boon" and hes just like "yeah, anything, granted" LIKE WAIT TO HEAR WHAT IT IS FIRST MAN CMON THE KID GETTIN BEAT DOWN IS YOUR FAULT
November 20, 2025 at 4:18 AM
been listening to the dragnet radio show and its so funny hearing this "lapd hero cop stops bad drug men!" story with regular breaks to go "SMOKE FATIMA CIGARETTES, THE BEST CIGS. WE GOT SO MANY LOYAL CUSTOMERS. WONDER WHY"

but who knew cigarettes were bad back then, besides the whole damn industry
November 19, 2025 at 5:26 AM
at home
drawing pictures
of monster cocks
with him on top
November 18, 2025 at 6:24 PM
Reposted by Schmeev
You can love someone you love even if you don't love yourself🏳️‍⚧️
But if you love yourself, you can love both yourself and the person you love. Your love becomes twofold.
So take care of yourself.
Your soul is beautiful.
November 18, 2025 at 2:33 PM
remembering that "fired for truth" dipshit saying "we need a left wing AND right wing, birds cant fly with just one wing!" like the most baby brained shit. we aint a bird, bitch

"PEDAL TO THE METAL BABY"
"theres a floormat there, not metal. make sure you check your mirrors and use your signals"
November 17, 2025 at 4:34 AM
misery business but its about finally getting the battletoads strategy guide

woah, i never beat big blag...but i got him where i want him now
November 16, 2025 at 5:49 PM