When correctly viewed, everything is lewd 😏

If you see this, I implore you to post from your device without context

I’ve got an exciting announcement about my political future! #Trump2028

He looks so badass. Maybe I should fake getting shot so people will like me more.

I’m sad to report that Disneyland is woke now.

They transgendered Mickey!

If you don’t think Rosie O’Donnell is a threat to our national security, watch this.

America: it’s time to wake up!

Since the woke media is attacking our brave Secret Police officers again, I’ve decided to share the guide that Tom Homan and I developed to help officers determine whether they have reasonable suspicion.

Hello Bluesky. Let’s have a debate:

Under US law, is it illegal for me to threaten to kill myself?

Wow, a president made of stone. My kids would love it. In fact, the first sentence Mirabel ever said was "I want to get stoned."

This sweet old man, Richard Moneybags, was going to sell his 2nd vacation home. Our Big Beautiful Bill will allow him to not only save his homes, but also achieve the American Dream of buying yet another home.

Next time you attack our tax cuts, think about Mr. Moneybags.

Felt cute, might delete your Medicaid coverage.

A brave Redditor recently proposed government-funded masturbation stalls, which promise to reduce crime and give men a safe place to conduct business. The President and I are considering this proposal as a means of funding our mass deportation campaign.

I wonder if other VPs had as much excitement as I do 😂

I converted to Catholicism out of a deep appreciation for the beautiful artwork it has produced. However, there is always room for improvement.

Please see below:

Contrary to popular belief, the United States never intended to destroy Iran’s nuclear program. The strikes were intended as a symbolic victory over woke Hamas.