Jordan is the Huggiest Kaiju
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parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Jordan is the Huggiest Kaiju
@parchmentscroll.bsky.social
400 followers 150 following 4.3K posts
Transgender
Transhumanist
System
She/They
Tumblr: https://bat-in-the-machine.tumblr.com
Mastodon: @parchmentscroll@meow.social (https://meow.social/@parchmentscroll )
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parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Apologies for the watermark, I no longer have the video editing software I used to use, but...
November 22, 2025 at 7:22 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Orson Welles staring intently at the camera
November 18, 2025 at 8:21 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
your last saved meme is your moral philosophy

I

I don't remember downloading this or the context or even who that is
somebody hitting someone else with a chair at a debate, with the words "We'll Be Right Back" superimposed over the image
November 17, 2025 at 2:46 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
oh no I thought @bitterkarella.bsky.social made this take up as a gag
IGN (A picture of Bill Skarsgård as Pennywise the Dancing Clown) Why Isn't Pennywise in The Running Man?
November 16, 2025 at 5:58 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
I'll be honest, I did enjoy that show more when Aileen was in the episode.
Agent Aileen from the Men in Black cartoon, a blue-skinned woman with frizzy red hair.
November 16, 2025 at 3:52 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Me, googling Malört, and finding their website at malort.com: "WORMWOOD? Well shit that's uhhhhh a choice."

Their official timeline, clarifying, "not JUST wormwood..."
2016: In an effort to keep Malört's full-bodied flavor, Patricia and Sam secure a long-term source for the strongest, most unpalatable wormwood.
November 15, 2025 at 6:36 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
It wasn't that long ago that $4.03 a gallon would've been unthinkable, instead of the cheapest gas in town.
November 12, 2025 at 8:17 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
I genuinely do recommend the series. As to why, here's the premise of the light novels, from Wikipedia:
PremiseKei and Yuri are the two members of Trouble Consultant team 234, code named "Lovely Angels". Almost every mission they are involved with ends up in disaster, though not failure: they typically complete their assignment, but cause incredible collateral damage in the process, earning the nickname the "Dirty Pair", a moniker they openly hate being called. They are always cleared of any wrongdoing by the 3WA's Central Computer because the extreme collateral damage is never actually determined to be their fault, although their mere presence tends to worsen the situations for which they are hired. In some but not all continuities, they have joint extrasensory perception powers, usually limited to precognition. This talent was the reason they were recruited in the first place
November 11, 2025 at 6:52 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Just keeping it within Tesla...
Tesla salaries in California: How much does Tesla pay? Average Tesla hourly pay ranges from approximately $21.72 per hour for Parts Advisor to $43.93 per hour for Senior CNC Machinist. The average Tesla salary...
November 6, 2025 at 10:52 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
the dumbest fucking timeline
RFK Jr. suggests circumicision is linked to autism. Here's what experts say. by Sara Moniuszko Updated on: October 14, 2025
November 5, 2025 at 11:33 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
At first I was like "he's kind of young in this maybe it's before he did his thing" but when you're learning about him from a questgiver, she explicitly mentions him having done the experiments, so no.

Also, since the events of the book are canon...
Oscar Isaac as Poe Dameron in Rise of the Skywalkers, captioned "Somehow, Dr. Frankenstein returned..."
November 5, 2025 at 8:32 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Only the most normal of extremely normal people.
Ad paid for by California Republican Party 1001 K Street, Fourth Floor Sacramento, CA 95814
November 5, 2025 at 5:32 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Welcome to the voter panopticon! This is an absolutely fully hinged, extremely normal way to talk about voting.
A mailer from the California GOP. It depicts a middle-agreed white woman staring at the reader through binoculars, and reads: YOUR NEIGHBORS ARE WATCHING. HAVE YOU VOTED TO STOP PROP 50 YET? Act Now to stop Newsom from passing Prop 50 and letting the Sacramento politicians rig our elections by drawing their own districts. Once they take our power, they'll never give it back! Don't let your neighbors down. They'll FIND OUT! the other side of the mailer, with the name and address of the recipient cropped out. It depicts a smiling white woman peering over a metal railing and reads YOUR NEIGHBORS ARE WATCHING. HAVE YOU VOTED TO STOP PROP 50 YET? HOW YOU VOTE IS A SECRET. WHETHER OR NOT YOU VOTE ISN'T. VOTE NO ON PROP 50 TODAY!
November 5, 2025 at 5:24 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
I have, in the past, had NFT dipshits argue that it was no different from my avatar. To which I say, I sent an artist a drawing I had done of this character years ago. She sent back beautiful art of that character, for which she tried to undercharge me. (🎨@chaiyote.bsky.social)
A cute picture of an anthropomorphic golden-crowned flying fox with bright blue eyes and long purple hair. She is wearing blue jeans and a grey-green tank top and holding a smartphone in her left hand.
November 4, 2025 at 8:17 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
I'd read it.
November 3, 2025 at 6:09 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
The same image of a cheesecake with a slice cut out of it, except an open-water swimmer has been hastily photoshopped into the upper lfeft corner.
November 3, 2025 at 6:34 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
A rubber nozzle for an inflatable toy.
November 3, 2025 at 3:46 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
If you're under the impression that Tumblr is dead, and you don't know what Children's Hospital Color Theory is, it starts with this...
A photograph of a hallway in a children's hospital. On the floor, coming out of a set of double doors, are two wide, dark red streaks which curve organically and have other colors of red streaks alongside them. The effect is rather organic, which makes the streaks fairly well resemble fresh blood.
November 3, 2025 at 3:45 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
It works but the moveset is practically random.
An old nickelodeon built around an upright piano with its cabinet opened to show the other instruments built into it.
November 2, 2025 at 11:28 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Chatbot ads are super fucking disturbing
An AI image of Astrid from the CGI version of How to Train Your Dragon: a young blonde woman with a thick braid over one shoulder and a headband. She is wearing a white spaghetti strap crop top and orange jeans with two buttons, one on either side of the fly, neither of which seem to have anything to do with keeping the floor fastened. Her arms are tied behind her back, she has a white gag tied tightly in her mouth, and she is crying, with a pleading expression. It is captioned "me when I found out TruMate has no filter"
November 1, 2025 at 4:13 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
jesus fuck
The Bluesky Profile of the quoted user. Richard Pearman @graptopetalum.bsky.social 413 followers 230 following Science fiction writer working on a "Messianic space Narnia" series. Collects cacti and succulents.
October 30, 2025 at 5:42 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
TERRIBLE MOVIES I LIKE ANYWAY:
Brain Damage
Aylmer the brain parasite from Brain Damage. A goofy looking wrinkled thing with a wide smile and sunken blue eyes. It's skin is a very dark grey-green with bright blue in the wrinkles, which resemble a brain.
October 30, 2025 at 4:15 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
I have a ridiculously huge games library SPECIFICALLY because Amazon gives away a dozen games a month to Prime subscribers.
An Amazon Games library displaying 36 titles including Blasphemous, Void Bastards, The Messenger...
October 29, 2025 at 2:26 AM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Baby if you're not coming straight home we need dog fud
A still from the Stanley Kubrick adaptation of The Shining. A hallway with cheerful yellow wallpaper is liberally splattered with blood. An overturned chair sits on one side. In the hallway are the bodies of two dead young girls and an axe. It is labeled "Caption this with the last text you've sent."
October 28, 2025 at 4:42 PM
parchmentscroll.bsky.social
Wow, that's exactly what I said!
A bluesky exchange: Me: The article starts off by being blatantly transmedicalist. Artemis @ The Needle: To be "blatantly transmedicalist," the article would have to defend cishet doctors limiting our transition access based on the doctor's deciding how fuckable we're going to be. The article doesn't do this!! "being aware of need profile" =/= "transmedicalism" We're very pro-DIY, pro autonomy Me: That's not what transmedicalist means, and you should be ashamed for seeing l arguing that it does. You start out with several paragraphs denigrating people who, in your words, "look masculine." You call people who haven't medically transitioned "cissexual" without regard for the reason.
October 28, 2025 at 2:42 AM