I love to masticate
But only when I’m hungry
But only when I’m hungry
October 18, 2025 at 12:57 AM
I love to masticate
But only when I’m hungry
But only when I’m hungry
Reposted by brandon 🍥
"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
May 4, 2025 at 2:22 PM
"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States."
Reposted by brandon 🍥
If the hot dog don't look like this I DON'T WANT IT!!
May 3, 2025 at 6:42 PM
If the hot dog don't look like this I DON'T WANT IT!!
Reposted by brandon 🍥
*Man discovers that medical advancements lead to proper diagnoses*
RFK JR: ADD, ADHD, Tourette syndrome, Narcolepsy, Autism.. All of these are injuries that I never heard of when I was a kid.
April 23, 2025 at 1:13 PM
*Man discovers that medical advancements lead to proper diagnoses*
Reposted by brandon 🍥
“We just simply stopped drinking Bud Light!”
March 20, 2025 at 3:03 PM
“We just simply stopped drinking Bud Light!”
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Gooood morning sinners~! 🙃
March 18, 2025 at 4:12 PM
Gooood morning sinners~! 🙃
Reposted by brandon 🍥
“no one wants to work anymore”
*calls outside of work hours*
*can’t convert a pdf*
*schedules meetings just to listen to themself think out loud at an audience*
*screams for a millennial every time they need to use the printer*
*makes 10x more than you*
*calls outside of work hours*
*can’t convert a pdf*
*schedules meetings just to listen to themself think out loud at an audience*
*screams for a millennial every time they need to use the printer*
*makes 10x more than you*
March 18, 2025 at 1:31 PM
“no one wants to work anymore”
*calls outside of work hours*
*can’t convert a pdf*
*schedules meetings just to listen to themself think out loud at an audience*
*screams for a millennial every time they need to use the printer*
*makes 10x more than you*
*calls outside of work hours*
*can’t convert a pdf*
*schedules meetings just to listen to themself think out loud at an audience*
*screams for a millennial every time they need to use the printer*
*makes 10x more than you*
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Very tired of shows and movies where the hero kills and maims underlings en masse but hesitates or just DOES NOT when they get to the boss of bosses who has been the architect of evil and cruelty. If you kill the henchmen, you better do the same to their boss.
March 18, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Very tired of shows and movies where the hero kills and maims underlings en masse but hesitates or just DOES NOT when they get to the boss of bosses who has been the architect of evil and cruelty. If you kill the henchmen, you better do the same to their boss.
Reposted by brandon 🍥
I think a lot about how Crazy Rich Asians made a ton of money, huge hit, beloved movie. Sequel, guaranteed hit. And then the Asian woman cowriting the script asked to be paid the same amount as the white man they paired her with, and the studio completely abandoned the sequel rather than do that
March 17, 2025 at 5:07 AM
I think a lot about how Crazy Rich Asians made a ton of money, huge hit, beloved movie. Sequel, guaranteed hit. And then the Asian woman cowriting the script asked to be paid the same amount as the white man they paired her with, and the studio completely abandoned the sequel rather than do that
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Kelly: When I was flying in combat over Iraq during the first Gulf War, I didn’t expect that there was a 10-year-old kid sitting in South Africa who would one day become the richest guy in the world and call me a traitor for doing my job. Now, he kind of acts like a 12-year-old kid
March 12, 2025 at 11:09 PM
Kelly: When I was flying in combat over Iraq during the first Gulf War, I didn’t expect that there was a 10-year-old kid sitting in South Africa who would one day become the richest guy in the world and call me a traitor for doing my job. Now, he kind of acts like a 12-year-old kid
Reposted by brandon 🍥
REMEMBER: if your company is no longer supporting DEI, ALWAYS USE THE ACRONYM
March 12, 2025 at 11:40 PM
REMEMBER: if your company is no longer supporting DEI, ALWAYS USE THE ACRONYM
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Wow — mega congrats to Bluesky on reaching 33 MILLION users! 💙🦋
bsky-users.theo.io
bsky-users.theo.io
March 12, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Wow — mega congrats to Bluesky on reaching 33 MILLION users! 💙🦋
bsky-users.theo.io
bsky-users.theo.io
Reposted by brandon 🍥
My husband ran a successful business and used our local rural post office daily. My elderly neighbor’s meds come through the rural post office.
The post office is one of the only places left open in my rural community. Losing it could quite literally kill my town and my neighbors.
The post office is one of the only places left open in my rural community. Losing it could quite literally kill my town and my neighbors.
March 7, 2025 at 1:28 PM
My husband ran a successful business and used our local rural post office daily. My elderly neighbor’s meds come through the rural post office.
The post office is one of the only places left open in my rural community. Losing it could quite literally kill my town and my neighbors.
The post office is one of the only places left open in my rural community. Losing it could quite literally kill my town and my neighbors.
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Did you know, that if you text your boss…
“GO FUCK YOURSELF”
you don’t have to go to work anymore?
Follow me for more life hacks…
“GO FUCK YOURSELF”
you don’t have to go to work anymore?
Follow me for more life hacks…
March 4, 2025 at 5:09 PM
Did you know, that if you text your boss…
“GO FUCK YOURSELF”
you don’t have to go to work anymore?
Follow me for more life hacks…
“GO FUCK YOURSELF”
you don’t have to go to work anymore?
Follow me for more life hacks…
Reposted by brandon 🍥
I’m not going to the Joint Address. I will be live posting and chatting with you all here instead. Then going on IG Live after.
March 4, 2025 at 6:08 PM
I’m not going to the Joint Address. I will be live posting and chatting with you all here instead. Then going on IG Live after.
Reposted by brandon 🍥
problem solved
March 3, 2025 at 11:10 AM
problem solved
Reposted by brandon 🍥
The accuracy of the political cartoons recently is incredibly painful.
March 2, 2025 at 11:20 PM
The accuracy of the political cartoons recently is incredibly painful.
Reposted by brandon 🍥
Reposted by brandon 🍥
March 1, 2025 at 8:44 PM
I am thoroughly embarrassed to be a US citizen.
February 28, 2025 at 10:04 PM
I am thoroughly embarrassed to be a US citizen.
I hate when my boss brags to me about doing the bare minimum for the day like wtf is wrong with you
February 28, 2025 at 2:26 PM
I hate when my boss brags to me about doing the bare minimum for the day like wtf is wrong with you