It’s Doris, Bitches
@moaningdoris.bsky.social
Just a woman who lives off cheese, pickles, and fruit snacks and who is controlled by cats. Sometimes funny, other times snarky. Start a conversation with me because who doesn’t like a good DM or reply?
If you like red hats, you’re going to HATE me!
If you like red hats, you’re going to HATE me!
I miss the good ol’ days of lockdown.
April 5, 2025 at 4:10 AM
I miss the good ol’ days of lockdown.
When a McDonald’s cheeseburger tastes better and has more flavor that the banquet food you’ve had to eat for the last week at a convention.
February 9, 2025 at 1:22 AM
When a McDonald’s cheeseburger tastes better and has more flavor that the banquet food you’ve had to eat for the last week at a convention.
I hope Musk treats the government like he does his employees - expecting them to work 80+ hours, sleep at their desk, and to do it all for free.
February 4, 2025 at 3:21 PM
I hope Musk treats the government like he does his employees - expecting them to work 80+ hours, sleep at their desk, and to do it all for free.
Beverly Hills by Weezer just cam won’t be radio. As an LA resident I can assure everyone that nobody wants to be in Beverly Hills right now. #lafires #californiafires
January 12, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Beverly Hills by Weezer just cam won’t be radio. As an LA resident I can assure everyone that nobody wants to be in Beverly Hills right now. #lafires #californiafires
They say there are plenty of fish in the sea, but I bet there are even more dead hookers.
December 20, 2024 at 2:39 PM
They say there are plenty of fish in the sea, but I bet there are even more dead hookers.
Watching everything happening with Luigi right now has me wondering if this is what France felt like right before the beheadings.
December 15, 2024 at 3:19 PM
Watching everything happening with Luigi right now has me wondering if this is what France felt like right before the beheadings.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
When your MAGA uncle wonders why Trump is threatening tariffs and raising the prices of everything, after he repeatedly promised to do the opposite, look him straight in the eye and gently whisper:
"It was never about you...and now he doesn't need you anymore"
"It was never about you...and now he doesn't need you anymore"
December 1, 2024 at 12:52 PM
When your MAGA uncle wonders why Trump is threatening tariffs and raising the prices of everything, after he repeatedly promised to do the opposite, look him straight in the eye and gently whisper:
"It was never about you...and now he doesn't need you anymore"
"It was never about you...and now he doesn't need you anymore"
Things I have in common with a Crybertruck.
1. Wide rear end.
2. Mobile cum dumpster.
3. No one with class would be caught dead with me.
1. Wide rear end.
2. Mobile cum dumpster.
3. No one with class would be caught dead with me.
November 29, 2024 at 3:52 AM
Things I have in common with a Crybertruck.
1. Wide rear end.
2. Mobile cum dumpster.
3. No one with class would be caught dead with me.
1. Wide rear end.
2. Mobile cum dumpster.
3. No one with class would be caught dead with me.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
you dumb bitch (complimentary)
November 26, 2024 at 7:03 PM
you dumb bitch (complimentary)
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
State Farm: Like a good neighbor, mind your own fucking business.
November 22, 2024 at 5:46 PM
State Farm: Like a good neighbor, mind your own fucking business.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
[Sam Elliott voice]
When the great Twitter Migration of ‘24 began, it was a force of nature. They thundered across the grassy plains, an endless shaggy herd that stretched to the horizon and beyond.
(1/2)
When the great Twitter Migration of ‘24 began, it was a force of nature. They thundered across the grassy plains, an endless shaggy herd that stretched to the horizon and beyond.
(1/2)
November 22, 2024 at 12:00 PM
[Sam Elliott voice]
When the great Twitter Migration of ‘24 began, it was a force of nature. They thundered across the grassy plains, an endless shaggy herd that stretched to the horizon and beyond.
(1/2)
When the great Twitter Migration of ‘24 began, it was a force of nature. They thundered across the grassy plains, an endless shaggy herd that stretched to the horizon and beyond.
(1/2)
LA has two types of drivers on the freeway. Those who go 25 over the speed limit and those who go 25 under the speed limit.
November 22, 2024 at 3:32 PM
LA has two types of drivers on the freeway. Those who go 25 over the speed limit and those who go 25 under the speed limit.
Double, no triple it.
Opening a restaurant named ‘Peace and Quiet’ where kids meals cost $80
November 22, 2024 at 2:32 PM
Double, no triple it.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
What fraction of a Scaramucci was Gaetz’ nomination as AG?
November 21, 2024 at 7:59 PM
What fraction of a Scaramucci was Gaetz’ nomination as AG?
I never had a huge shitter following, about 2k at my peak and that took about a year to gain. Honestly, if my number here never reaches 10% of that and I spend my time screaming into the void, I’m okay with that. This place is just so calming and peaceful.
November 21, 2024 at 7:56 PM
I never had a huge shitter following, about 2k at my peak and that took about a year to gain. Honestly, if my number here never reaches 10% of that and I spend my time screaming into the void, I’m okay with that. This place is just so calming and peaceful.
Covid left me severely immunocompromised - the HHS policies coming in the coming months and years are either going to make me a shut in or kill me. Maybe both. There are many like me in this same situation.
November 21, 2024 at 2:47 PM
Covid left me severely immunocompromised - the HHS policies coming in the coming months and years are either going to make me a shut in or kill me. Maybe both. There are many like me in this same situation.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
Happy Thursdsy, y’all!
a pixel art of a man standing under a rainbow on a blue background
ALT: a pixel art of a man standing under a rainbow on a blue background
media.tenor.com
November 21, 2024 at 2:32 PM
Happy Thursdsy, y’all!
John said this in 2016. Eight years later and it still holds true.
November 21, 2024 at 12:41 PM
John said this in 2016. Eight years later and it still holds true.
Reposted by It’s Doris, Bitches
Surgeon General Barbie
November 21, 2024 at 12:23 PM
Surgeon General Barbie
I wonder which appointment he’ll give Alex Jones.
November 20, 2024 at 10:49 PM
I wonder which appointment he’ll give Alex Jones.