Matthew FitzSimmons
@matthewfitzsimmons.bsky.social
Lives in Washington D.C., writes novels, provides shade and a central meeting place at concerts.
Latest novel is The Slate, available now: https://a.co/d/dDW6gce
Latest novel is The Slate, available now: https://a.co/d/dDW6gce
Pinned
I had a political thriller, The Slate,come out in October before Bluesky exploded. Didn’t mention it here then, so doing it now because that’s just shrewd marketing on my part.
Not a fan of the expression, "lost my virginity." Everyone knows exactly where they left it.
November 22, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Not a fan of the expression, "lost my virginity." Everyone knows exactly where they left it.
Die Hard is Alien in an office building told from the monster's point of view. Hans Gruber is Ripley, forced to watch his entire crew murdered before being pushed out the airlock.
🎥
🎥
November 21, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Die Hard is Alien in an office building told from the monster's point of view. Hans Gruber is Ripley, forced to watch his entire crew murdered before being pushed out the airlock.
🎥
🎥
November 21, 2025 at 3:45 PM
29 days until deadline and 150 pages of rewrites to go makes Matthew something something.
November 21, 2025 at 2:06 PM
29 days until deadline and 150 pages of rewrites to go makes Matthew something something.
It seems absurd that this word didn’t reenter common usage sometime in the last ten years. What are we even doing people?
Word of the day is ‘quockerwodger’ (19th century): a puppet politician whose strings are pulled entirely by someone else.
November 21, 2025 at 1:37 PM
It seems absurd that this word didn’t reenter common usage sometime in the last ten years. What are we even doing people?
Ballet performs ballets, opera performs operas, theater performs plays.
November 20, 2025 at 9:29 PM
Ballet performs ballets, opera performs operas, theater performs plays.
Strong I295 vibes.
"By the way, I’m not trying to actually kill one. That’s not my thing at all. If that’s what you’re getting from this, then I don’t know what you’re reading or how you thought that, but you’re totally off base."
I Like to Almost Kill People by Driving Past Them at 125 mph in My Modified Honda Accord
Everyone’s got their thing. For some, it’s baking. Others, gardening. Me? I like to take a modified Honda Accord, drive over 100 mph, and swerve be...
buff.ly
November 20, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Strong I295 vibes.
Reposted by Matthew FitzSimmons
Dundurn Press Holiday Special (Use Code Below When Ordering Online)
Click here for my books: tinyurl.com/2tjff33k
Or here: tinyurl.com/4psa676u
Reminder: Books Make Excellent Presents.
@dundurnpress.bsky.social @crimewriterscanada.bsky.social
Click here for my books: tinyurl.com/2tjff33k
Or here: tinyurl.com/4psa676u
Reminder: Books Make Excellent Presents.
@dundurnpress.bsky.social @crimewriterscanada.bsky.social
November 19, 2025 at 1:39 PM
Dundurn Press Holiday Special (Use Code Below When Ordering Online)
Click here for my books: tinyurl.com/2tjff33k
Or here: tinyurl.com/4psa676u
Reminder: Books Make Excellent Presents.
@dundurnpress.bsky.social @crimewriterscanada.bsky.social
Click here for my books: tinyurl.com/2tjff33k
Or here: tinyurl.com/4psa676u
Reminder: Books Make Excellent Presents.
@dundurnpress.bsky.social @crimewriterscanada.bsky.social
Trump Approves the Release of the Epstein Files, but Loopholes Remain
www.nytimes.com
November 20, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Trump Loyalist Admits Grand Jury Never Saw Final Comey Indictment
www.nytimes.com
November 19, 2025 at 8:35 PM
"My dear Donald, don't call them piggy. Just lure them into a consulate and have them dismembered."
November 18, 2025 at 7:02 PM
"My dear Donald, don't call them piggy. Just lure them into a consulate and have them dismembered."
What perfect album came out the year you turned 16?
November 18, 2025 at 12:12 PM
What perfect album came out the year you turned 16?
Both are animated chickens.
November 17, 2025 at 9:40 PM
Both are animated chickens.
Most adages are useful but all come with fine print. Always read the fine print.
November 17, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Most adages are useful but all come with fine print. Always read the fine print.
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.*
*Unless they are duplicitous lunatics who will eat my face at the earliest opportunity.
*Unless they are duplicitous lunatics who will eat my face at the earliest opportunity.
Raskin: We are a big tent. We must be a huge, vast tent. I say this is a party that’s got room for Marjorie Taylor Greene if she wants to come over.
November 17, 2025 at 5:37 PM
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.*
*Unless they are duplicitous lunatics who will eat my face at the earliest opportunity.
*Unless they are duplicitous lunatics who will eat my face at the earliest opportunity.
Top 5 Genres:
- Quiet guy in background is pulling all the strings.
- We hate each other, but after we do this impossible thing a grudging respect nay love will emerge.
- In a foreign land I come to know myself better than before.
- One montage from greatness
- We’re putting the band back together.
- Quiet guy in background is pulling all the strings.
- We hate each other, but after we do this impossible thing a grudging respect nay love will emerge.
- In a foreign land I come to know myself better than before.
- One montage from greatness
- We’re putting the band back together.
My top 5 genres:
finding love in a dystopian liminal space
we’re stuck in a remote location and something is killing us one by one
stumbled on a bag of cash and keeping it in the belief that this can’t possibly backfire
space rogues being roguish in space
the irredeemable improbably redeemed
finding love in a dystopian liminal space
we’re stuck in a remote location and something is killing us one by one
stumbled on a bag of cash and keeping it in the belief that this can’t possibly backfire
space rogues being roguish in space
the irredeemable improbably redeemed
What are your top 5 movie genres? Mine are:
- Roaring rampage of revenge
- Reluctantly, I must resume my life of violence
- On reflection, the risk assessment on our giant monster facility and/or attraction could have been more thorough
- Girl survives
- Crime but make it quirky
- Roaring rampage of revenge
- Reluctantly, I must resume my life of violence
- On reflection, the risk assessment on our giant monster facility and/or attraction could have been more thorough
- Girl survives
- Crime but make it quirky
November 16, 2025 at 8:08 PM
Top 5 Genres:
- Quiet guy in background is pulling all the strings.
- We hate each other, but after we do this impossible thing a grudging respect nay love will emerge.
- In a foreign land I come to know myself better than before.
- One montage from greatness
- We’re putting the band back together.
- Quiet guy in background is pulling all the strings.
- We hate each other, but after we do this impossible thing a grudging respect nay love will emerge.
- In a foreign land I come to know myself better than before.
- One montage from greatness
- We’re putting the band back together.
The Flaming Lips are playing the Anthem on New Year's Eve, and I can't think of a better way to kiss 2025 goodbye then cry/singing Do You Realize? at midnight.
November 16, 2025 at 2:30 PM
The Flaming Lips are playing the Anthem on New Year's Eve, and I can't think of a better way to kiss 2025 goodbye then cry/singing Do You Realize? at midnight.
I love that songs like, Lay Lady Lay, You Can't Always Get What You Want, Space Oddity, and I Wanna Be Your Dog were all released in July 69. The biggest stars of one decade reaching their apogee while the innovators of what would follow were already hard at work.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=M38f...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=M38f...
The Stooges .. "I Wanna Be Your Dog" (1969)
YouTube video by Punk rocks
www.youtube.com
November 16, 2025 at 2:01 PM
I love that songs like, Lay Lady Lay, You Can't Always Get What You Want, Space Oddity, and I Wanna Be Your Dog were all released in July 69. The biggest stars of one decade reaching their apogee while the innovators of what would follow were already hard at work.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=M38f...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=M38f...
You buy a bird feeder with dreams of beautiful plumage and rarely glimpsed avian wonders only to see thirty dollars worth of birdseed ravaged by a horde of sparrows in under forty-five seconds.
November 14, 2025 at 6:42 PM
You buy a bird feeder with dreams of beautiful plumage and rarely glimpsed avian wonders only to see thirty dollars worth of birdseed ravaged by a horde of sparrows in under forty-five seconds.
We used to woodchip things in this country.
patton oswalt has been suspended from bluesky for saying that megyn kelly should be fed to a woodchipper for justifying the sexual abuse of minors
November 14, 2025 at 3:00 PM
We used to woodchip things in this country.
We all have our origin stories. Mine was summer camp in 8th grade reading Helter Skelter while listening to Zeppelin and Doors record over and over and over (only thing our camp counselor played all summer). That guy sure loved Riders on the Storm.
There was really no coming back from that.
There was really no coming back from that.
November 14, 2025 at 2:28 PM
We all have our origin stories. Mine was summer camp in 8th grade reading Helter Skelter while listening to Zeppelin and Doors record over and over and over (only thing our camp counselor played all summer). That guy sure loved Riders on the Storm.
There was really no coming back from that.
There was really no coming back from that.
Not to the fifteen year old, you soulless ghoul.
IT'S HAPPENING
November 13, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Not to the fifteen year old, you soulless ghoul.