Tess of the D’Ysfunctional
@madamlibra-rian.bsky.social
Librarian
Women's Football Enthusiast(USWNT/Spirit/Liverpool)
TedBecca Pedestrian+
Musical Theater Pilgrim
Old Hollywood Binger
Would invade France for Hannah Waddingham
Women's Football Enthusiast(USWNT/Spirit/Liverpool)
TedBecca Pedestrian+
Musical Theater Pilgrim
Old Hollywood Binger
Would invade France for Hannah Waddingham
Parasocially, I’m so so glad Croix and Weezy have each other for camp because I would hate for one of them to be alone
*yes I have been watching the NT videos with a full on pout
*yes I have been watching the NT videos with a full on pout
November 25, 2025 at 4:21 AM
Parasocially, I’m so so glad Croix and Weezy have each other for camp because I would hate for one of them to be alone
*yes I have been watching the NT videos with a full on pout
*yes I have been watching the NT videos with a full on pout
The hits keep coming and they don’t stop coming fr
November 24, 2025 at 10:54 PM
The hits keep coming and they don’t stop coming fr
Reposted by Tess of the D’Ysfunctional
On media day, I asked Kysha what it was like coming into this tight Spirit squad:
“I called my mom and I was like ‘damn, why didn’t you tell me I have a lot of sisters in Washington?’”
“I called my mom and I was like ‘damn, why didn’t you tell me I have a lot of sisters in Washington?’”
November 24, 2025 at 9:48 PM
On media day, I asked Kysha what it was like coming into this tight Spirit squad:
“I called my mom and I was like ‘damn, why didn’t you tell me I have a lot of sisters in Washington?’”
“I called my mom and I was like ‘damn, why didn’t you tell me I have a lot of sisters in Washington?’”
Kysha 😭 I’m not ready.
Kysha Sylla posted a goodbye message on Instagram.
No announcements from the Spirit yet, but it seems clear they're not going to renew her loan from Lyonnes.
The Spirit enter the offseason with an intl. roster spot crunch: 13 players (incl. Sylla) for 10 spots...but that'll be 8 spots on 1/1/2026.
No announcements from the Spirit yet, but it seems clear they're not going to renew her loan from Lyonnes.
The Spirit enter the offseason with an intl. roster spot crunch: 13 players (incl. Sylla) for 10 spots...but that'll be 8 spots on 1/1/2026.
November 24, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Kysha 😭 I’m not ready.
Michelle Kang has me weeping?????
November 24, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Michelle Kang has me weeping?????
Tell me you don’t know NWSL history without telling me you don’t know NWSL history.
Also, preemptively blocking anyone who’s a Spirit fan whether they said anything about your post or not is really surviving in them trenches. Great job.
Also, preemptively blocking anyone who’s a Spirit fan whether they said anything about your post or not is really surviving in them trenches. Great job.
November 23, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Tell me you don’t know NWSL history without telling me you don’t know NWSL history.
Also, preemptively blocking anyone who’s a Spirit fan whether they said anything about your post or not is really surviving in them trenches. Great job.
Also, preemptively blocking anyone who’s a Spirit fan whether they said anything about your post or not is really surviving in them trenches. Great job.
Berman, now you absolutely have to raise the cap cause Trin has to win another championship with the Spirit. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules.
November 23, 2025 at 4:54 AM
Berman, now you absolutely have to raise the cap cause Trin has to win another championship with the Spirit. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules.
Reposted by Tess of the D’Ysfunctional
Need a Spirit fan to give Hal the biggest hug. I’m so gutted for her.
November 23, 2025 at 3:29 AM
Need a Spirit fan to give Hal the biggest hug. I’m so gutted for her.
Just gonna say, I hope Hal and Trin are ok and that theyre all taking care of each other. They had a hell of a season and a hell of a game. It honestly could have gone either way imo and I can’t wait to be back in Audi next season to cheer then on. 🫶🏽 @washingtonspirit.com I love ya
November 23, 2025 at 3:58 AM
Just gonna say, I hope Hal and Trin are ok and that theyre all taking care of each other. They had a hell of a season and a hell of a game. It honestly could have gone either way imo and I can’t wait to be back in Audi next season to cheer then on. 🫶🏽 @washingtonspirit.com I love ya
The Spirit Witch says cheer for the Spirit or else.
November 22, 2025 at 10:28 PM
The Spirit Witch says cheer for the Spirit or else.
Sandy speaking TRUTH about cooking for your (single)self. Can't I just purchase enough to make a meal and not have leftover ingredients that will then just rot on me? What if I don't want asparagus 5 days in a row??
And finally, I went long with Sandy MacIver about hashbrowns, eggs Benedict, and what it’s like to cook as a professional athlete who lives alone:
![SANDY MACIVER ON HASHBROWNS, POACHING EGGS, AND COOKING AND EATING AS A PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE WHO LIVES ALONE
Q: What do you get up to on your days off?
We don't get up to a lot. I usually go for brunch with Es[me Morgan], to be honest.
Q: What do you order for brunch?
Back home I'd get eggs Benedict, which I can get here, but it's just not the same. … Back home, I love hash browns, but your hash browns here are not the same. … To me, a hash brown back home is like a tater tot, but it's like a triangle, and they're my favorite things back home. I love hash browns. I love going for brunch. Eggs Benedict with a side of hash browns is my order. … To me, eggs Benedict is an English muffin. I like to have mine with bacon, but then the bacon in this country to back home is quite different, very different. … It's just not the same. I don't know, the sauce isn't—it's like, eh…
Q: Hollandaise is hard to make, and poaching eggs is too.
Do you know what? I've been working on my poached egg.
Q: You have!?
I have been working on a poached egg, and I'm very hit and miss with the timings. I should actually write down my timings because I just kind of like go by, Meh, we'll just see what happens. I literally just get a nice little swirl going, pour it in.
Q: Do you do the vinegar too?
No, I don't.
Q: I don't know if it's worth the smell.
No, I don't think it is.
Q: Do you make poached eggs for eggs Benedict or is this for another dish?
I've never actually made an eggs Benedict. … Do you know what the problem is? I live on my own and it's really hard. Can you imagine making a hollandaise sauce for one person?
Q: Right, you would have to store a lot of it, or just make just a—](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:rn7pv7y7h5bnb26trk6uo2cn/bafkreiah2xiouhwejlkugyqnlrrqdguburq7kbn7ju46o4syiqerzqdezm@jpeg)
![Exactly, this is the problem! This is the information we need, is food! Living on your own and cooking is hard. Right, so for example last week before we came, I had to pick my vegetable for the week—I don't know what you're gonna do with this content—but I have to pick a vegetable for the week because also in America, if I want asparagus, oh, I can't just get a little bunch. I have to have like 50 pieces of like, half a meter long asparagus, so I have to have that for the whole week. That should be spoken about more often, is cooking as a single person on your own.
Q: To bring it back to soccer a little bit, how much do you factor in these things for making sure you're fueled? Is it hard to balance cooking on your own with what you need literally for your job?
Do you know what, yeah, it is actually quite hard, but we're probably lucky, unlucky—I don't know—but pretty much the whole team lives in the same apartment block. So there's been a few times like—[Sofia Cantore walks by and says hi]—Oh, speak of the devil, Esme and I will go to Sof’s since she'll cook us a nice pasta, won't you?
Q: That's a pretty good person to cook you pasta.
Yeah, she does really good pasta actually.
Q: I bet. Does she make the pasta from scratch?
She can, but she hasn't for us. But we did go to her brother's and her brother made us fresh pasta and it was unbelievable.
Q: Do you think there's anything that the league or the team could do to help make the food situation less hard?
Honestly, probably not, we have a nutritionist. To be honest, do you know what, I'm just being awkward because if I really wanted to, I could probably take leftovers from lunch [at practice] and just—’cause there's usually a meat option, a fish option, vegan option, do you know what I mean? Like I could probably take the other option, and take that home, but I actually quite enjoy cooking and experimenting with that. I'm on a little cooking journey, myself, at the minute.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:rn7pv7y7h5bnb26trk6uo2cn/bafkreibj4gnr3olopgbca2625kolyxd35wstph7sav6bkgzgtd7bp6okvm@jpeg)
November 21, 2025 at 2:24 PM
Sandy speaking TRUTH about cooking for your (single)self. Can't I just purchase enough to make a meal and not have leftover ingredients that will then just rot on me? What if I don't want asparagus 5 days in a row??
NWSL is the best league but we're loosing the BEST players left and right because they want to be paid in money. Do nothing and instead of having a good league, we're going to be the MLS.
"They're going to come for the VibEs" Not if you're NOT GOING TO PAY THEM WHAT THEY'RE WORTH.
November 21, 2025 at 4:19 AM
NWSL is the best league but we're loosing the BEST players left and right because they want to be paid in money. Do nothing and instead of having a good league, we're going to be the MLS.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*berman on TWG live
*berman on TWG live
Ic0niclisa Throwing GIF
ALT: Ic0niclisa Throwing GIF
media.tenor.com
November 21, 2025 at 4:11 AM
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*berman on TWG live
*berman on TWG live
SHE WANTS TO STAY.
Berman and the nwsl is seriously fumbling this and I hope they never find sleep again
Berman and the nwsl is seriously fumbling this and I hope they never find sleep again
Trinity Rodman killing it on the blue carpet tonight! #NWSL
November 19, 2025 at 11:32 PM
SHE WANTS TO STAY.
Berman and the nwsl is seriously fumbling this and I hope they never find sleep again
Berman and the nwsl is seriously fumbling this and I hope they never find sleep again
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
No Hal is disappointing and I'm SURE Tara would be here but I'm pretty sure her wedding is around here
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
No Hal is disappointing and I'm SURE Tara would be here but I'm pretty sure her wedding is around here
November 19, 2025 at 4:29 PM
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
No Hal is disappointing and I'm SURE Tara would be here but I'm pretty sure her wedding is around here
WEEZY AND CROIX
WEEZY AND CROIX
No Hal is disappointing and I'm SURE Tara would be here but I'm pretty sure her wedding is around here
It’s always Gotham
November 16, 2025 at 10:28 PM
It’s always Gotham
So glad I get to just watch this game for the vibes. As Es said yesterday, I have equal reasons to want to beat both teams so bring it on.
November 16, 2025 at 8:02 PM
So glad I get to just watch this game for the vibes. As Es said yesterday, I have equal reasons to want to beat both teams so bring it on.
I think I hurt my vocal chords very lightly yesterday 😂
November 16, 2025 at 6:36 PM
I think I hurt my vocal chords very lightly yesterday 😂
Oh hey, I’m in this
November 16, 2025 at 12:22 AM
Oh hey, I’m in this
No voice, no problem. MY TEAM IS GOING TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP 😭
November 15, 2025 at 8:05 PM
No voice, no problem. MY TEAM IS GOING TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP 😭
Even with leaving early, metro delays will cause me to just make kick off. As long as nothing else happens 🙄 Never change wmata
November 15, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Even with leaving early, metro delays will cause me to just make kick off. As long as nothing else happens 🙄 Never change wmata
Reposted by Tess of the D’Ysfunctional
This comment means the world! The library is for everyone. For autistic you, ADHD you, dyslexic you, neurodivergent you 💚
It is difficult for some to use a library voice, to whisper. THAT’S OKAY. You belong in the library, we will work together. I admire YOU 😊
Take a look, it’s in a book 💛
It is difficult for some to use a library voice, to whisper. THAT’S OKAY. You belong in the library, we will work together. I admire YOU 😊
Take a look, it’s in a book 💛
November 11, 2025 at 2:47 PM
This comment means the world! The library is for everyone. For autistic you, ADHD you, dyslexic you, neurodivergent you 💚
It is difficult for some to use a library voice, to whisper. THAT’S OKAY. You belong in the library, we will work together. I admire YOU 😊
Take a look, it’s in a book 💛
It is difficult for some to use a library voice, to whisper. THAT’S OKAY. You belong in the library, we will work together. I admire YOU 😊
Take a look, it’s in a book 💛
After that Seattle game, I would notttttt be speaking on Marta/Pride that way
November 11, 2025 at 2:50 PM
After that Seattle game, I would notttttt be speaking on Marta/Pride that way