Fuck it, I say, as I dump the entire bag of pizza rolls on the baking sheet

Did you know flying four and a half hours while six months pregnant sucks really really bad? Now I do.

What’s the most underrated Thanksgiving food? I will start. Whiskey.

*beavers see running water*

we are absolutely putting a stop to this nonsense

Reform UK, what they say and what they do.

Why sit in a crowded bar to watch the Bears lose when I could sit at home for free and air out my stinky slipper feet in peace

My wife & I tried role play but we kept fighting over who would be Mr. Bean

idk just seems like folks didn’t really try hard enough to have fun at Fyre Fest

Most people are watching Christmas movies this time of year so of course I’m watching the super cheerful 1984 classic ‘Threads’. Nothing like the threat of complete nuclear annihilation to spread the Christmas spirit.