@gapernet.bsky.social
fixin' to be half as funny and twice as horny as my twitter
Pinned
Call me Nancy Pelosi's fake boobs the way I'm performatively standing up for the Liberal Resistance.
@early90spants.com Hey Producer Dan my buddy and I are going crazy trying to figure out what the YKS bumper music is, like coming back from ads and whatnot.
We are both sure we've heard it before but we can't place it. My guess is it's from a sitcom I never watched on purpose. Please help us!
We are both sure we've heard it before but we can't place it. My guess is it's from a sitcom I never watched on purpose. Please help us!
September 8, 2025 at 8:25 PM
@early90spants.com Hey Producer Dan my buddy and I are going crazy trying to figure out what the YKS bumper music is, like coming back from ads and whatnot.
We are both sure we've heard it before but we can't place it. My guess is it's from a sitcom I never watched on purpose. Please help us!
We are both sure we've heard it before but we can't place it. My guess is it's from a sitcom I never watched on purpose. Please help us!
Reposted
Werner Herzog would respect Heathcliff but despise Garfield due to their differing approaches to embracing domesticity
August 28, 2025 at 12:24 AM
Werner Herzog would respect Heathcliff but despise Garfield due to their differing approaches to embracing domesticity
For some reason my wife's glasses came with this cum rag with good cumrag advice printed on it.
May 11, 2025 at 12:28 AM
For some reason my wife's glasses came with this cum rag with good cumrag advice printed on it.
Thinking about how horny springtime used to make me when I was young makes me really horny.
May 4, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Thinking about how horny springtime used to make me when I was young makes me really horny.
Dogg the app added more stats for NYT Connections and I am so psyched. 'Purple First' is an excellent stat to see
I look at the wordlebot after every puzzle and for crossword data I actually use an external site, xwstats.com.
I look at the wordlebot after every puzzle and for crossword data I actually use an external site, xwstats.com.
April 15, 2025 at 7:38 AM
Dogg the app added more stats for NYT Connections and I am so psyched. 'Purple First' is an excellent stat to see
I look at the wordlebot after every puzzle and for crossword data I actually use an external site, xwstats.com.
I look at the wordlebot after every puzzle and for crossword data I actually use an external site, xwstats.com.
Chili Restaurant.
4 base chilis:
•red w/ chunks
•red w ground
•green
•green w/ pork
•1 (maybe two*) rotating chili
Toppings bar
Fried okra, beans & rice, collard greens, cornbread, house-made little flour tortillas.
*maybe 1 rotating house chili & 1 rotating guest chili
4 base chilis:
•red w/ chunks
•red w ground
•green
•green w/ pork
•1 (maybe two*) rotating chili
Toppings bar
Fried okra, beans & rice, collard greens, cornbread, house-made little flour tortillas.
*maybe 1 rotating house chili & 1 rotating guest chili
April 14, 2025 at 8:03 AM
Chili Restaurant.
4 base chilis:
•red w/ chunks
•red w ground
•green
•green w/ pork
•1 (maybe two*) rotating chili
Toppings bar
Fried okra, beans & rice, collard greens, cornbread, house-made little flour tortillas.
*maybe 1 rotating house chili & 1 rotating guest chili
4 base chilis:
•red w/ chunks
•red w ground
•green
•green w/ pork
•1 (maybe two*) rotating chili
Toppings bar
Fried okra, beans & rice, collard greens, cornbread, house-made little flour tortillas.
*maybe 1 rotating house chili & 1 rotating guest chili
I've been noticing huge loogies on the drivers' sides of cybetrucks after I walk past them. I'll be walking up and I don't see anything there, and then after I walk past when I look back there's a big gob of boogs and spit right there where you open the door. It's the damnedest thing.
March 29, 2025 at 6:29 AM
I've been noticing huge loogies on the drivers' sides of cybetrucks after I walk past them. I'll be walking up and I don't see anything there, and then after I walk past when I look back there's a big gob of boogs and spit right there where you open the door. It's the damnedest thing.
I've seen plenty (PLENTY.) of porno videos that purport to be truly amateur, but they obviously have a giant special effects budget to make the guy's hog appear to be huge. I can't concentrate when they use VFX to make it look more than 4". That's too unrealistic and I can't suspend my disbelief.
March 20, 2025 at 7:21 PM
I've seen plenty (PLENTY.) of porno videos that purport to be truly amateur, but they obviously have a giant special effects budget to make the guy's hog appear to be huge. I can't concentrate when they use VFX to make it look more than 4". That's too unrealistic and I can't suspend my disbelief.
If Resist Liberals were serious about opposing PresidentTrump they should have pulled a Dirty Work during the car commercial he did today.
March 12, 2025 at 3:34 AM
If Resist Liberals were serious about opposing PresidentTrump they should have pulled a Dirty Work during the car commercial he did today.
I think only worms should be called "worms".
We need a different word for all those other animals called "worms" that aren't worms.
None of those those marine worms or insect larvae or microscopic creatures should be called "worms".
Worms are worms and that's it.
We need a different word for all those other animals called "worms" that aren't worms.
None of those those marine worms or insect larvae or microscopic creatures should be called "worms".
Worms are worms and that's it.
March 11, 2025 at 6:46 AM
I think only worms should be called "worms".
We need a different word for all those other animals called "worms" that aren't worms.
None of those those marine worms or insect larvae or microscopic creatures should be called "worms".
Worms are worms and that's it.
We need a different word for all those other animals called "worms" that aren't worms.
None of those those marine worms or insect larvae or microscopic creatures should be called "worms".
Worms are worms and that's it.
We're teaching The Boy people make bad choices, but there aren't "bad guys".
He asks "I need to ask you something. Police put people in jail when they make bad choices. Why do people wanna do that?"
Right away my brilliant wife said "we don't really know why people want to be police officers.".
He asks "I need to ask you something. Police put people in jail when they make bad choices. Why do people wanna do that?"
Right away my brilliant wife said "we don't really know why people want to be police officers.".
March 8, 2025 at 10:42 AM
We're teaching The Boy people make bad choices, but there aren't "bad guys".
He asks "I need to ask you something. Police put people in jail when they make bad choices. Why do people wanna do that?"
Right away my brilliant wife said "we don't really know why people want to be police officers.".
He asks "I need to ask you something. Police put people in jail when they make bad choices. Why do people wanna do that?"
Right away my brilliant wife said "we don't really know why people want to be police officers.".
The top five beneficiaries of masking were:
1) piggy-nosed women with decent bods
2) people who would die otherwise
3) people who have to look at people with severely ugly faces
4) people with severely ugly faces
5) loved ones of people who would die otherwise
1) piggy-nosed women with decent bods
2) people who would die otherwise
3) people who have to look at people with severely ugly faces
4) people with severely ugly faces
5) loved ones of people who would die otherwise
March 4, 2025 at 8:07 AM
The top five beneficiaries of masking were:
1) piggy-nosed women with decent bods
2) people who would die otherwise
3) people who have to look at people with severely ugly faces
4) people with severely ugly faces
5) loved ones of people who would die otherwise
1) piggy-nosed women with decent bods
2) people who would die otherwise
3) people who have to look at people with severely ugly faces
4) people with severely ugly faces
5) loved ones of people who would die otherwise
Tony Blinken was strong determined evil, boasting "Good news Bibi, I persuaded Joe to throw in an extra $100 million worth of bombs for those refugee camps."
Little Marco is pathetic evil, sheepishly muttering "I'm sorry President Zelensky, but President Trump says you gotta go home now."
Little Marco is pathetic evil, sheepishly muttering "I'm sorry President Zelensky, but President Trump says you gotta go home now."
March 1, 2025 at 6:50 AM
Tony Blinken was strong determined evil, boasting "Good news Bibi, I persuaded Joe to throw in an extra $100 million worth of bombs for those refugee camps."
Little Marco is pathetic evil, sheepishly muttering "I'm sorry President Zelensky, but President Trump says you gotta go home now."
Little Marco is pathetic evil, sheepishly muttering "I'm sorry President Zelensky, but President Trump says you gotta go home now."
Somebody needs to invent a modular bun that can accommodate either a burger or a sausage with grace.
February 28, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Somebody needs to invent a modular bun that can accommodate either a burger or a sausage with grace.
Boner Boperator: long-hail trucker / sex worker. always pulls a double trailer. back trailer is the payload she's hauling; front trailer is a fancy bordello where she does sex work. Boner Boperator.
February 27, 2025 at 6:50 AM
Boner Boperator: long-hail trucker / sex worker. always pulls a double trailer. back trailer is the payload she's hauling; front trailer is a fancy bordello where she does sex work. Boner Boperator.
I've been thinking about that scene in Basic Instinct where you see Sharon Stone's pussy. I think one of the best things about that scene is when you see her pussy.
February 26, 2025 at 8:51 AM
I've been thinking about that scene in Basic Instinct where you see Sharon Stone's pussy. I think one of the best things about that scene is when you see her pussy.
Weed bubblegum should be a popular thing.
February 22, 2025 at 6:39 AM
Weed bubblegum should be a popular thing.
I never could have accurately predicted how much were gonna be accurately using the terms "henchmen" and "goons" during this administration.
January 31, 2025 at 6:48 AM
I never could have accurately predicted how much were gonna be accurately using the terms "henchmen" and "goons" during this administration.
It's cool that The Brutalist has an intermission so you know when to re-up your weed gummies.
January 28, 2025 at 5:29 AM
It's cool that The Brutalist has an intermission so you know when to re-up your weed gummies.
Just saw that new Timothee Chalomet movie. Apparently that guy Bob he played was, like, a real person in real life.
January 15, 2025 at 5:51 AM
Just saw that new Timothee Chalomet movie. Apparently that guy Bob he played was, like, a real person in real life.
Slick move, @chriswade.bsky.social. I caught how you used the Grateful Dead playing at the pyramids as bumper music after hot pyramid talk.
December 20, 2024 at 9:14 AM
Slick move, @chriswade.bsky.social. I caught how you used the Grateful Dead playing at the pyramids as bumper music after hot pyramid talk.
The Narduwar interview of Andre 3000 is tight cuz Andre 3000 is the first person Narduwar has ever interviewed who is exactly on Narduwar's level.
Narduwar never perplexes Three Stacks, he just really feels everything Narduwar throws at him.
Narduwar never perplexes Three Stacks, he just really feels everything Narduwar throws at him.
December 13, 2024 at 10:28 AM
The Narduwar interview of Andre 3000 is tight cuz Andre 3000 is the first person Narduwar has ever interviewed who is exactly on Narduwar's level.
Narduwar never perplexes Three Stacks, he just really feels everything Narduwar throws at him.
Narduwar never perplexes Three Stacks, he just really feels everything Narduwar throws at him.
In my estimation, Pink Floyd was the band of my parents'generation who made perfect records again and again while continually growing and outpacing all of their peers.
By that very high standard, I think the Pink Floyd of my generation was OutKast.
By that very high standard, I think the Pink Floyd of my generation was OutKast.
December 13, 2024 at 9:53 AM
In my estimation, Pink Floyd was the band of my parents'generation who made perfect records again and again while continually growing and outpacing all of their peers.
By that very high standard, I think the Pink Floyd of my generation was OutKast.
By that very high standard, I think the Pink Floyd of my generation was OutKast.