Zoey (gay)
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fartcaptor.bsky.social
Zoey (gay)
@fartcaptor.bsky.social
1K followers 630 following 4.5K posts
I, homo

Trans lesbian millennial in Minnesota who needs to get her shit together

🏳️‍🌈‍🏳️‍⚧️🏴‍☠️🦋
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fartcaptor.bsky.social
Look out, here comes my piss
November 26, 2025 at 2:11 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
Three sets of lesbians 🥰
Screen cap from the Umamusume: Pretty Derby mobile game showing the opponent team selection screen for the Unity Cup (all racers are horse girls) Team 1: Winning Ticket, Narita Taishin, and Biwa Hayahide (a polycule) Team 2: Tokai Teio and Mejiro McQueen (wives) Team 3: Daitaku Helios and Mejiro Palmer (dating, codependent)
November 24, 2025 at 4:52 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
a new lesbian ship has appeared
A pretty dark-skinned american woman with long dreads (?) with highlights, wearing a teal zip-up vest, black visor and white golf skirt, standing on a golf course next to her caddie, an older, light-skinned woman with dark gray hair in a short bob, wearing a white pantsuit and teal cap, carrying a teal golf bag on her shoulder
November 24, 2025 at 4:17 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
YES. YES YOU ARE.
Aoi's mom, sadly talking to some assistant, saying "I'm a terrible parent, aren't I?"
November 24, 2025 at 4:08 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
she golfed to close to the sun (a lesbian) 😔
Screen cap from the anime "Birdie Wing: Golf Girls' Story" Eve is lying in a large fluffy bed wearing a black tank top and denim short shorts. She's got bandages on her legs from the ankles to her hips and her arms from the wrist to the shoulder, and a cast on her left forearm, which is in a sling. She's looking a bit grumpy and/or despondent The subtitles are the butler/trainer guy talking on the phone to her mafia granddad & sponser. He's saying "Her wrists, hips, neck, ankles… they're all badly damaged."
November 24, 2025 at 3:46 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
She's trying SO HARD to not have impure thoughts about Super Creek
Super Creek smiling pleasantly and talking to a bunch of reporters, while her trainer Fumino Nase is has her head against a wall, blushing and steaming and propping herself up, desperately trying to maintain her composure after the very very sweet thing Creek just said about her
November 24, 2025 at 3:07 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
Tamamo's trainer is pretty
Trainer Masami Komiyama. A pretty (non-horse girl) young woman, probably no more than 30 years old. She's got long green hair that's mostly down, except the front/top is tied back into a little pony tail, leaving the sides framing either side of her face. She's got rimless glasses, and four gold piercings on the ear that's visible. One little stud in the lobe where most people's ears get pierced, and three little bands that wrap around the rim of the ear near the top
November 24, 2025 at 3:00 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
I love when they draw Oguri like this
Oguri Cap in class, drawn flat and simplified so she has no nose and big dot eyes, making her seem very vacant and possibly depressed
November 24, 2025 at 2:45 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
SHE'S SO CUTE I LOVE HER
Michelle My Baby smiling and blushing adorably as she talks to the press on as she prepares for her flight home. They asked her and Obey Your Master if either of them would be returning to run in the Japan Cup next year, and she's answering "I think I'm good. Being someone else's snack is not on my to-do list"
November 24, 2025 at 2:35 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
They should also kiss
At an airport terminal, the fashionable Gold City smiles and shakes the hand of the also fashionable Ellerslie Pride (for sure this time) and says "We should do a photo shoot or something together"
November 24, 2025 at 2:33 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
They should kiss
Moonlight Lunacy - NOT Ellersie Pride like I thought before - sitting in a hospital room filled to her waist with roses, looking solemn as an Injured Toni Bianca pokes her head out from the pile, smiling and saying "Your words are as tender as ever" Moonlight Lunacy, now turned to glare at Toni with her fists raised, saying "What?! What part of that sounded tender?!"
November 24, 2025 at 2:29 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
she gay for the Italian
A close up, front-on shot of a horse girl with lavender colored hair tied up in a big braid that hangs over one shoulder. She's looking a bit sweaty and tired from running (the race is nearly over) but has a look of almost pained concern on her face as she thinks "Toni…" while watching the other racer falter suddenly
November 24, 2025 at 2:15 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
now everyone's competing to be the gayest
Screen cap of the anime "Umamusume: Cinderella Gray" A side view of Italian horse-girl Toni Bianca (dressed like a European aristocrat with a long green coat, long curled red hair, and a fancy tricorner hat with a big feather) running in the Japan Cup, leaning so far forward her back is almsot horizontal, baring her teeth with a snarl as she responds to Tamamo Cross and Obey Your Master making their moves by beginning her own final spurt, depicted by crackling, yet smokey rainbow colored energy trailing from her eyes and across the screen
November 24, 2025 at 2:10 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
YURI
Screen cap from the "Umamusume: Pretty Derby" mobile game. Inside a claw machine a cute chibi plush doll of Daiwa Scarlet is being carried by the prize claw. She's clinging to a doll of her rival (wife) Vodka. Both have big happy smiles and closed eyes so it really just looks like they're cuddling
November 23, 2025 at 11:51 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
STOP! This is a selfie checkpoint ☑️. I am posting a cute selfie of me and my cat and you may NOT proceed until you tell us how cute we are!

DO NOT JUDGE MY MAKEUP I DON'T GET MUCH PRACTICE 😤
A mirror selfie of me, Zoey! I've got square black glasses, black lipstick and collar length auburn hair. I'm wearing a black dress with lacey mesh sleeves and a short necklace with deep red stone. I could probably be considered cute from this one exact angle
November 22, 2025 at 7:21 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
This seems wildly inaccurate and I blame the horse question for only listing uma I've never even heard of before 😤
Your Result: Hammer Whether it's a tack hammer, a piece of pipe casually repurposed into a club, or a wrench swung around like a survival horror guy out of bullets, you are a classic Hammer Gay. You would absolutely love to hear someone's bones crack under the force of your blows, but you are a gentle spirit not predisposed to mischief. Advice: get into the kind of kink where people draw blood. It's a better use of your time than the Internet, and you'd have a better time than you'd think. More Quizzes
November 22, 2025 at 7:09 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
I've never heard of these horses

Why tf isn't Gold Ship on here 😤
Question 8 of 8 Choose a pony. Answers, please choose 1 Pinkie Pie Twilight Sparkle Applejack Fluttershy Rarity Spike Peridot Vriska Rainbow Dash You fucked up. Spike isn't a pony
November 22, 2025 at 6:45 PM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
I'm slightly sad that they didn't include the specific animations the game would need to have these two do the thing where they squabble while literally pushing their faces together
Daiwa Scarlet with her fists on her hips and Vodka with her arms folded, glaring angrily at each other while leaning in so much that their faces are much closer than necessary
November 22, 2025 at 2:09 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
lol
The same screen, now with a prompt for the player to select a dialog option. The only choice is an all-caps "CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?"
November 22, 2025 at 2:00 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
It's good to have confirmation that this franchise knows exactly how Vodka and Scarlet's relationship looks and that they're absolutely doing it on purpose
Agnes Digital out on the side of the track watching Vodka and Scarlet train together, saying: "Was all that tsundere stuff just a struggle to show her true feelings?! Eeeep, are we even allowed to be watching this?! The sinfully bittersweet taste of rivals to—"
November 22, 2025 at 1:55 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
She is the Greek chorus for all the lesbians who play
Agnes Digital, now in her school uniform and out on the campus mall, shaking her upturned hands in front of her as she thinks "(Because those two are definitely more than rivals...)" referring to Vodka and Daiwa Scarlet, who she just saw walk by squabbling
November 22, 2025 at 1:48 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
Oh. She's not *just* a fangirl. She's canonically a pervert :3
Screen cap from the "Umamusume: Pretty Derby" mobile game Agnes Digital (a petite, light skinned horse girl with very long pink hair, wearing a red and white track suit) is in her dorm room, holding her arms open wide to the sky and smiling as she says: "Simping for cute girls is a rite by which my filthy heart is purified! To respect is to know shame, and embracing that truth fills my soul with heaven's light! A hope so pure it, it-"
November 22, 2025 at 1:41 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
SHE'S UP TO SINISTER HORSE BUSINESS, I KNOW IT
Tamamo Cross and Obey Your Master (another one of the tall American horse girls, who has blue tips in her blonde hair and one american flag thigh-high sock) in the tunnel leading out to the track. Obey Your Master has her hand on Tama's shoulder and is acting all friendly even though they've never met, and telling Tama "It doesn't feel like our first meeting to me, you know?" (because she's been spying and/or receiving detailed intel on all the other racers)
November 21, 2025 at 2:50 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
Michelle My Baby when are you coming to the mobile game
"Michelle My Baby", the buff, basketball playing horse girl from the US, stepping out towards the race track looking confident and muscley
November 21, 2025 at 2:44 AM
fartcaptor.bsky.social
an very good horms
Screen cap from the anime "Umamusume: Cinderella Gray" Oguri Cap is wearing her signature racewear (something like a Japanese girl's sailor-style school uniform but with a big shiny star on the chest) staring blankly straight at the camera with simplified cartoon eyes, with her one loose sticking-up hair forming a question mark on top of her head She is waiting for input
November 21, 2025 at 2:42 AM