Eli Allison
@eliallison.bsky.social
Nerd Writer & Angry Artist.
I live in Yorkshire, hate sunshine, and do not enjoy long walks on the beach or anywhere. In fact, I get upset at having to walk to the fridge for cheese.
I live in Yorkshire, hate sunshine, and do not enjoy long walks on the beach or anywhere. In fact, I get upset at having to walk to the fridge for cheese.
Pinned
Eli Allison
@eliallison.bsky.social
· Nov 13
Website, loaded with weird shizzle. 👇
www.eli-allison.com
www.eli-allison.com
Where is the 'like a racoon on meth' option...
How messy are Britons?
Very messy: 6%
Fairly messy: 25%
Fairly tidy: 51%
Very tidy: 17%
yougov.co.uk/topics/socie...
Very messy: 6%
Fairly messy: 25%
Fairly tidy: 51%
Very tidy: 17%
yougov.co.uk/topics/socie...
July 17, 2025 at 4:03 PM
Where is the 'like a racoon on meth' option...
I mean I too suffer complete collapse when faced with mild problems, but I'm not claiming to be God's gift to fucking humanity.
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
Advanced AI suffers ‘complete accuracy collapse’ in face of complex problems, study finds
‘Pretty devastating’ Apple paper raises doubts about race to reach stage of AI at which it matches human intelligence
www.theguardian.com
June 9, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I mean I too suffer complete collapse when faced with mild problems, but I'm not claiming to be God's gift to fucking humanity.
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
I just threw up a little....
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
‘One day I overheard my boss saying: just put it in ChatGPT’: the workers who lost their jobs to AI
From a radio host replaced by avatars to a comic artist whose drawings have been copied by Midjourney, how does it feel to be replaced by a bot?
www.theguardian.com
May 31, 2025 at 12:53 PM
I just threw up a little....
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
www.theguardian.com/technology/2...
Reposted by Eli Allison
My plans for a major retail emporium are being threatend by wholesalers who won't let me steal the stock.
May 24, 2025 at 8:33 AM
My plans for a major retail emporium are being threatend by wholesalers who won't let me steal the stock.
Reposted by Eli Allison
Everything you need to know about the trans Supreme Court case: What it said, what it didn't, and what happens next iandunt.substack.com/p/everything...
Everything you need to know about the trans Supreme Court case
What it said, what it didn't, and what happens next.
iandunt.substack.com
May 1, 2025 at 7:37 AM
Everything you need to know about the trans Supreme Court case: What it said, what it didn't, and what happens next iandunt.substack.com/p/everything...
Reposted by Eli Allison
What's the most brutal insult you've ever heard in your language? I think the most savagely specific one that I've ever encountered was from Finnish... sun gradu oli varmaan 20 sivua. It means "your thesis was probably 20 pages long"
April 29, 2025 at 7:05 PM
What's the most brutal insult you've ever heard in your language? I think the most savagely specific one that I've ever encountered was from Finnish... sun gradu oli varmaan 20 sivua. It means "your thesis was probably 20 pages long"
Reposted by Eli Allison
For #AlienDay, my deep dive into the creation and destruction of the iconic Space Jockey.
filmstories.co.uk/news/alien-t...
filmstories.co.uk/news/alien-t...
Alien | The birth and curious death of HR Giger’s Space Jockey
To mark Alien Day, we head back to the late 1970s to see how HR Giger designed the Space Jockey - and its fate after the film's premiere...
filmstories.co.uk
April 26, 2025 at 8:23 AM
For #AlienDay, my deep dive into the creation and destruction of the iconic Space Jockey.
filmstories.co.uk/news/alien-t...
filmstories.co.uk/news/alien-t...
My soul just did a vomit.
I do not want any of J D Vance's freedom seeds, especially downrange.
March 27, 2025 at 4:44 PM
My soul just did a vomit.
No longer is it enough to shit on things you've seen/heard/paid for, now hate must be pre-loaded. Hate in every direction, dimension and timeline. A scattergun of rage, who cares where it lands? It's the kick-back, the ricochet, the semi you get while doing it.
Welcome to the apex of hate.
Welcome to the apex of hate.
Am sure I'm in for a kicking in certain parts of the internet for this, but this sport of hating a film before you've seen it? It's not right.
Snow White, and the sport of hating a film before you’ve actually seen it
Disney's new live action Snow White film is being billed as the most hated film of all time, by people who haven't actually seen it.
filmstories.co.uk
February 27, 2025 at 9:21 AM
No longer is it enough to shit on things you've seen/heard/paid for, now hate must be pre-loaded. Hate in every direction, dimension and timeline. A scattergun of rage, who cares where it lands? It's the kick-back, the ricochet, the semi you get while doing it.
Welcome to the apex of hate.
Welcome to the apex of hate.
Reposted by Eli Allison
The brand new #FilmStories issue 54 is available to order now! Find out what's inside and get your 168-page issue here:
https://buff.ly/41hRukN
https://buff.ly/41hRukN
Film Stories issue 54! 168 pages, Alien On Stage, Alien On Page, Sally
SHIPPING END OF FEBRUARY Issue 54 of Film Stories magazine, with 168 pages! On really nice paper too. A film magazine the kind of which people used to make! Inside:ALIEN ON STAGE: A bunch of Dorset…
buff.ly
February 25, 2025 at 6:50 PM
The brand new #FilmStories issue 54 is available to order now! Find out what's inside and get your 168-page issue here:
https://buff.ly/41hRukN
https://buff.ly/41hRukN
Death of Stalin, fucking genius.
February 1, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Death of Stalin, fucking genius.
Her apprentice notebook in hand is all ears.
She speaks softly so as not to scare. "#Conjures pull and drag at the magic. Witches work with it."Her hands ebb and flow with the spell.
"And what do wizards do?"
"Drink and fart and bore."
#vss365
She speaks softly so as not to scare. "#Conjures pull and drag at the magic. Witches work with it."Her hands ebb and flow with the spell.
"And what do wizards do?"
"Drink and fart and bore."
#vss365
January 29, 2025 at 9:25 AM
Her apprentice notebook in hand is all ears.
She speaks softly so as not to scare. "#Conjures pull and drag at the magic. Witches work with it."Her hands ebb and flow with the spell.
"And what do wizards do?"
"Drink and fart and bore."
#vss365
She speaks softly so as not to scare. "#Conjures pull and drag at the magic. Witches work with it."Her hands ebb and flow with the spell.
"And what do wizards do?"
"Drink and fart and bore."
#vss365
Reposted by Eli Allison
One of the most enjoyably candid interviews to hit the Film Stories podcast. Hugely entertaining man (him, not me).
Barry Sonnenfeld joins Film Stories with in a #podcast special. Topics include the Coen Brothers, Get Shorty, and more besides.
Podcast | In conversation with Barry Sonnenfeld: Coen Brothers, The Addams Family, Get Shorty, books, wearing two watches, a whole lot more
Barry Sonnenfeld joins Film Stories with a clickbait-free, longform podcast special - from the Coen Brothers to Get Shorty, and beyond.
buff.ly
January 24, 2025 at 10:16 AM
One of the most enjoyably candid interviews to hit the Film Stories podcast. Hugely entertaining man (him, not me).
Reposted by Eli Allison
#BadActorBingo note for the morning: the last few days have seen an increase in accounts that automate "Reply Guys as a service" by pulling random posts and having ChatGPT write a comment that superficially agrees but pivots to trying to start a fight halfway through.
December 3, 2024 at 8:56 PM
#BadActorBingo note for the morning: the last few days have seen an increase in accounts that automate "Reply Guys as a service" by pulling random posts and having ChatGPT write a comment that superficially agrees but pivots to trying to start a fight halfway through.
Catastrophic failure never looked so pretty...🤩
BREAKING: Debris seen over the Caribbean after SpaceX's Starship explodes during test flight
January 17, 2025 at 11:32 AM
Catastrophic failure never looked so pretty...🤩
ENDtim4s is furiously arguing on the chat board. 'Attack of the Clones is 💩. The Last Jedi is better!'
'Rian Johnson is a cultural vandal.'
'You esoteric 🤓!'
'Muggle!'
A deflated woman pops her head in, bandaged and covered in soot. "The army's here to evacuate us."
"Mom! I'M BUSY!"
#vss365
'Rian Johnson is a cultural vandal.'
'You esoteric 🤓!'
'Muggle!'
A deflated woman pops her head in, bandaged and covered in soot. "The army's here to evacuate us."
"Mom! I'M BUSY!"
#vss365
January 10, 2025 at 9:31 AM
ENDtim4s is furiously arguing on the chat board. 'Attack of the Clones is 💩. The Last Jedi is better!'
'Rian Johnson is a cultural vandal.'
'You esoteric 🤓!'
'Muggle!'
A deflated woman pops her head in, bandaged and covered in soot. "The army's here to evacuate us."
"Mom! I'M BUSY!"
#vss365
'Rian Johnson is a cultural vandal.'
'You esoteric 🤓!'
'Muggle!'
A deflated woman pops her head in, bandaged and covered in soot. "The army's here to evacuate us."
"Mom! I'M BUSY!"
#vss365
Reposted by Eli Allison
Get six issues of Film Stories delivered to your door, plus a FREE #NicolasCage scratch-off poster! Subscribe here:
https://buff.ly/3DwaymR
https://buff.ly/3DwaymR
6-Issue Subscription to Film Stories + FREE Nic Cage Scratch-off Poste
The next 6 issues of Film Stories, delivered to your door! The price includes UK postage & packing. For overseas subscriptions, please visit Webscribe. Order Now and receive an awesome A2 Nic Cage…
buff.ly
January 8, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Get six issues of Film Stories delivered to your door, plus a FREE #NicolasCage scratch-off poster! Subscribe here:
https://buff.ly/3DwaymR
https://buff.ly/3DwaymR
Reposted by Eli Allison
I now have more friends in Los Angeles who have evacuated or lost their homes than those who haven’t.
January 9, 2025 at 9:39 AM
I now have more friends in Los Angeles who have evacuated or lost their homes than those who haven’t.
The Victorian arcade would appear from nowhere, all lit up, a grand band playing. Stain glass and ironwork.
Signs offering trinkets and #sweets for the more 'discerning customer'.
But anyone who entered never came out... Melted down and turned into Walmart candles, 3 for a dollar.
#vss365
Signs offering trinkets and #sweets for the more 'discerning customer'.
But anyone who entered never came out... Melted down and turned into Walmart candles, 3 for a dollar.
#vss365
January 9, 2025 at 8:41 AM
Yay, it's lunchtime.
But, Oh I'm on a diet...
But, Oh I'm on a diet...
a woman with long blonde hair is smiling and wearing a white jacket and pink shirt .
ALT: a woman with long blonde hair is smiling and wearing a white jacket and pink shirt .
media.tenor.com
January 8, 2025 at 12:07 PM
Yay, it's lunchtime.
But, Oh I'm on a diet...
But, Oh I'm on a diet...
He fidgets. "Wanna play Guess Who?"
"No"
"Rummy?"
A sigh.
"What about rock paper scissors?"
"What are we five?"
"It's going to be a long trip if you don't cheer up."
"We can stop off at the services, and you can get a magazine."
'The nearest station is Mars! That's two years away.'
#vss365
"No"
"Rummy?"
A sigh.
"What about rock paper scissors?"
"What are we five?"
"It's going to be a long trip if you don't cheer up."
"We can stop off at the services, and you can get a magazine."
'The nearest station is Mars! That's two years away.'
#vss365
January 8, 2025 at 11:18 AM
He fidgets. "Wanna play Guess Who?"
"No"
"Rummy?"
A sigh.
"What about rock paper scissors?"
"What are we five?"
"It's going to be a long trip if you don't cheer up."
"We can stop off at the services, and you can get a magazine."
'The nearest station is Mars! That's two years away.'
#vss365
"No"
"Rummy?"
A sigh.
"What about rock paper scissors?"
"What are we five?"
"It's going to be a long trip if you don't cheer up."
"We can stop off at the services, and you can get a magazine."
'The nearest station is Mars! That's two years away.'
#vss365
"You're so beautiful, darling." His eyes mist over. He reaches out, hands shaking. "Will you spend your life with me, #Vesper?"
The garage lights switch on, and his wife stands at the door. "If I find you sitting in the Aston Martin without your pants on again, Tom, I'm leaving you."
#vss365
The garage lights switch on, and his wife stands at the door. "If I find you sitting in the Aston Martin without your pants on again, Tom, I'm leaving you."
#vss365
January 7, 2025 at 9:30 AM
Chimes and chants fill the room. "Breathe, in and out, surrender to the universe."
The instructor sees a man who has his hand up. "We don't do #questions, Sir."
"But what about all the other universes?"
She sighs, wondering why on earth she opened her meditation centre next to MIT.
#vss365
The instructor sees a man who has his hand up. "We don't do #questions, Sir."
"But what about all the other universes?"
She sighs, wondering why on earth she opened her meditation centre next to MIT.
#vss365
January 7, 2025 at 9:15 AM
Chimes and chants fill the room. "Breathe, in and out, surrender to the universe."
The instructor sees a man who has his hand up. "We don't do #questions, Sir."
"But what about all the other universes?"
She sighs, wondering why on earth she opened her meditation centre next to MIT.
#vss365
The instructor sees a man who has his hand up. "We don't do #questions, Sir."
"But what about all the other universes?"
She sighs, wondering why on earth she opened her meditation centre next to MIT.
#vss365
In a low, husky voice, "And so the creature has awakened from its long #solitude, its sweaty skin a sign that it's had a stressful night. It doesn't even groom itself before it hunts for food."
A low growling noise, followed by, "Fuck off with your David Attenborough impression, Dad."
#vss365
A low growling noise, followed by, "Fuck off with your David Attenborough impression, Dad."
#vss365
December 30, 2024 at 10:49 AM
Reposted by Eli Allison
UK indie filmmakers! Got a film coming out in 2025 we don't know about? Tell me! Tell @filmstories.bsky.social! Am commissioning writers to interview people like you for upcoming issues.
Writers who have never been paid for their work! I'm looking for you! Want to do one of these interviews?
Writers who have never been paid for their work! I'm looking for you! Want to do one of these interviews?
December 13, 2024 at 10:30 PM
UK indie filmmakers! Got a film coming out in 2025 we don't know about? Tell me! Tell @filmstories.bsky.social! Am commissioning writers to interview people like you for upcoming issues.
Writers who have never been paid for their work! I'm looking for you! Want to do one of these interviews?
Writers who have never been paid for their work! I'm looking for you! Want to do one of these interviews?