Marcus
@elgobsucram.bsky.social
Probably playing devil's advocate. Probably eating. Probably playing some RPG. Probably horny. Scientist and regulatory specialist.
At calisthenics class today one of the lads was told to "hump the fucking floor" to get his posterior tilt correct. He replied "But usually I AM the floor!", and so floor-shaming was born.
...
Be a good floor
Greedy floor
Silence, floor
You're just a floor
...
Be a good floor
Greedy floor
Silence, floor
You're just a floor
November 14, 2025 at 3:10 PM
At calisthenics class today one of the lads was told to "hump the fucking floor" to get his posterior tilt correct. He replied "But usually I AM the floor!", and so floor-shaming was born.
...
Be a good floor
Greedy floor
Silence, floor
You're just a floor
...
Be a good floor
Greedy floor
Silence, floor
You're just a floor
It's so annoying having a birthday in December. I've finally decided what I'm doing for my 40th ambur I can't say anything yet, because it's *NEXT* year. People will get confused.
November 14, 2025 at 1:30 PM
It's so annoying having a birthday in December. I've finally decided what I'm doing for my 40th ambur I can't say anything yet, because it's *NEXT* year. People will get confused.
Reposted by Marcus
Going for dinner with a friend tonight and he's one of *those*
November 14, 2025 at 8:53 AM
Going for dinner with a friend tonight and he's one of *those*
The way my form collapsed and I fell to the floor when the PT dropped a gossip bomb 😱
November 14, 2025 at 8:08 AM
The way my form collapsed and I fell to the floor when the PT dropped a gossip bomb 😱
I got papped cooking post-*cough* dinner
November 13, 2025 at 9:35 PM
I got papped cooking post-*cough* dinner
Here's to a good night 👀
November 13, 2025 at 8:28 PM
Here's to a good night 👀
Me leaving work knowing there's a fuuuuccckkk tonne of overdue stuff unfinished, that wasn't my department's delay so I couldn't finish it, and it won't be able to be finished until I'm back. On the 25th.
a woman in a white tank top and shorts is walking down the street .
ALT: a woman in a white tank top and shorts is walking down the street .
media.tenor.com
November 13, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Me leaving work knowing there's a fuuuuccckkk tonne of overdue stuff unfinished, that wasn't my department's delay so I couldn't finish it, and it won't be able to be finished until I'm back. On the 25th.
Not this business trying to tell me my quote has increased by *fifty three per cent* due to the increased National Insurance contributions. Not for a single-site company. No, sir.
I'd put money on that being common - people losing jobs because of NI but companies charged well above the increase.
I'd put money on that being common - people losing jobs because of NI but companies charged well above the increase.
November 13, 2025 at 2:38 PM
Not this business trying to tell me my quote has increased by *fifty three per cent* due to the increased National Insurance contributions. Not for a single-site company. No, sir.
I'd put money on that being common - people losing jobs because of NI but companies charged well above the increase.
I'd put money on that being common - people losing jobs because of NI but companies charged well above the increase.
Had a really shit workout this morning so I switched to funsies. Trying to keep my back straight as I kick into a straddle? Not happening mate.
November 13, 2025 at 1:17 PM
Had a really shit workout this morning so I switched to funsies. Trying to keep my back straight as I kick into a straddle? Not happening mate.
Honestly, Devil Wears Prada 2 should have been Devil Wears Primark and it would have been better than the first film by default.
November 13, 2025 at 10:14 AM
Honestly, Devil Wears Prada 2 should have been Devil Wears Primark and it would have been better than the first film by default.
Unwittingly became an accomplice to my friend's shit, problematic choice in men, as he's using my gym code for a "friend", who turns out to be just the latest "but he's being nice to me" episode from his psycho princess gay drama shag. I'll have to hear all about him being fucked and chucked. Again.
November 12, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Unwittingly became an accomplice to my friend's shit, problematic choice in men, as he's using my gym code for a "friend", who turns out to be just the latest "but he's being nice to me" episode from his psycho princess gay drama shag. I'll have to hear all about him being fucked and chucked. Again.
Ex-flatmate blagging how little he can pay me back per month due to the child maintenance, not realising I can do the calculation on the GOV website... Being very generous with the details I enter, he legally has to pay half what he's told me he's paying...
Not a guarantee, but if you knew him...
Not a guarantee, but if you knew him...
November 12, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Ex-flatmate blagging how little he can pay me back per month due to the child maintenance, not realising I can do the calculation on the GOV website... Being very generous with the details I enter, he legally has to pay half what he's told me he's paying...
Not a guarantee, but if you knew him...
Not a guarantee, but if you knew him...
Spotify keeping your exact location in a song from your last use months ago, only to bombard you with adverts when you press play, is nothing short of evil.
November 11, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Spotify keeping your exact location in a song from your last use months ago, only to bombard you with adverts when you press play, is nothing short of evil.
Whilst standing in silence at 11am, having just alerted the office building to the time via the fire alarm, I saw couriers, pedestrians and builders going about their day as normal. One child even screamed as it let it's parent know it's discomfort. Disrespectful. Shame them all.
November 11, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Whilst standing in silence at 11am, having just alerted the office building to the time via the fire alarm, I saw couriers, pedestrians and builders going about their day as normal. One child even screamed as it let it's parent know it's discomfort. Disrespectful. Shame them all.
Children in Need: When our generosity from being guilted into giving "just a tiny bit" is needed, that we have to make a sacrifice for, because our betters refuse to help our young by taking "just a tiny bit" from the rich, who won't miss it.
November 11, 2025 at 10:29 AM
Children in Need: When our generosity from being guilted into giving "just a tiny bit" is needed, that we have to make a sacrifice for, because our betters refuse to help our young by taking "just a tiny bit" from the rich, who won't miss it.
PT: eat more savoury breakfasts, it'll prevent much sweet cravings
Me, vindicated:
Me, vindicated:
November 11, 2025 at 9:10 AM
PT: eat more savoury breakfasts, it'll prevent much sweet cravings
Me, vindicated:
Me, vindicated:
Get that noughties pump
November 11, 2025 at 7:32 AM
Get that noughties pump
How is it only Tuesday
November 11, 2025 at 7:21 AM
How is it only Tuesday
No, fuck off, can we NOT do that to Blastoise.
November 11, 2025 at 5:57 AM
No, fuck off, can we NOT do that to Blastoise.
I just bought bottle of Lucozade for a homeless man so I'm due good karma.
...
Karma all over me, daddy.
...
Karma all over me, daddy.
November 10, 2025 at 2:32 PM
I just bought bottle of Lucozade for a homeless man so I'm due good karma.
...
Karma all over me, daddy.
...
Karma all over me, daddy.
This American style burger van is parked outside and hundreds of people have been going to it to novelty-buy food. It's fake. For filming only 😅
November 10, 2025 at 1:03 PM
This American style burger van is parked outside and hundreds of people have been going to it to novelty-buy food. It's fake. For filming only 😅
Low-key Mexican night with margaritas and chicken
November 9, 2025 at 9:26 PM
Low-key Mexican night with margaritas and chicken
When even your mates are telling you to post more thirst to grow your following then you know the gays are fucked up as a community
November 9, 2025 at 9:01 PM
When even your mates are telling you to post more thirst to grow your following then you know the gays are fucked up as a community
Just witnessed a taxi driver, nearly hit a cyclist, be called a "stupid fucking P*ki" for it by pedestrians... But when the cyclist launched into Great Ancoats Street, alone of the busiest roads in Manchester, causing multiple emergency stops... The same pedestrians? "well he was angry weren't he"
November 9, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Just witnessed a taxi driver, nearly hit a cyclist, be called a "stupid fucking P*ki" for it by pedestrians... But when the cyclist launched into Great Ancoats Street, alone of the busiest roads in Manchester, causing multiple emergency stops... The same pedestrians? "well he was angry weren't he"