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edmasterweb.bsky.social
Edmasterweb
@edmasterweb.bsky.social
I don’t do politics…I do human compassion. If you force me to do politics, I will always be on the side that has human compassion.
The hamburgers I’ve known can’t be helped.
January 9, 2026 at 4:30 PM
Instacart has a section called “Recipes Based on your Cart” and it keeps telling me to make bourbon chocolate chip cookies.
January 2, 2026 at 11:16 AM
If you spend the first half of your life making bad decisions, you’ll spend your second half living with them.

…and send.
January 1, 2026 at 11:28 PM
I wanna just set the clocks ahead ten hours and be done with it.
December 31, 2025 at 8:19 PM
Jeez..just a guy trying to live a frugal life. Do I really need these frigging Christmas ghosts interrupting my sleep all night?
December 25, 2025 at 5:39 AM
Life is brutally beautiful…

Or is it beautifully brutal?

Anyway…Merry Christmas
December 24, 2025 at 1:31 AM
Kinda missing my mom.

Would you come in the front door wearing this candy-stripe smock and yell “YOO-HOO”?
December 18, 2025 at 2:18 AM
Anyone else get to the end of a Wordle and quietly rave to themselves, “Frickin’ RIGHT that’s impressive!!! …cause I’m an IMPRESSIVE GUY!” or is that just me?
December 15, 2025 at 3:34 AM
I dropped my phone in the toilet, fished it out and now it seems to be working better than before.
December 13, 2025 at 11:48 AM
A chocolate-filled advent calendar is just a test of one’s will power. One that I am about to flunk.
December 7, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Does anyone else worry about Eleven’s sinuses?
November 29, 2025 at 2:28 AM
After 28 years, I firmly believe my partner puts up with me so I will keep changing the batteries in the smoke detector when it starts beeping.
November 24, 2025 at 12:33 AM
Once cats master a can opener it’s all over for humankind.
November 11, 2025 at 3:39 AM
October 8, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Going around checking neighbors doors to see if they got raptured. Hoping to claim a nicer apartment than mine.
September 23, 2025 at 10:01 PM
September 8, 2025 at 4:49 PM
I firmly believe my cat thinks daily about how delicious I will be after I die.
August 27, 2025 at 5:18 AM
Autotheocraticnihilism: If there is a God it’s you, but who gives a shit.
July 27, 2025 at 8:05 PM
“Um…’Who is my family’?
I’ll take Potpourri for $300, Alex.”
A two-headed monster who is defeated by getting it to ask itself what it wants for dinner every night.
July 18, 2025 at 10:20 AM
I love my asshole cat!
July 14, 2025 at 4:14 AM
Reposted by Edmasterweb
scratch a dad and you’ll unearth a lifetime of casual yet rigorous jerry rigging mastery
July 8, 2025 at 5:35 PM
July 4, 2025 at 3:23 PM
My parents were actively trying to get me killed.
June 30, 2025 at 1:00 PM
To be clear, my PFP was chosen long before I realized this was a cesspool of butthole skeets.
June 30, 2025 at 5:12 AM
This is so true.

Bonus: You get to relive that innocent excitement all over again, unjaded by decades of world-beaten experience.
Lean into it fully.
If a child is amazed by something be amazed with them. Sharing their excitement. They will remember that forever.
June 28, 2025 at 7:18 PM