Cpat
@cpat88.bsky.social
Twitter excile. Fat. Bald. Short. Ugly. NE3 TO DL14
Van dick with a elbow and handball no pen. Okay.
October 25, 2025 at 9:12 PM
Van dick with a elbow and handball no pen. Okay.
2pm on a Sunday? Canny. Mare for me mind won't be able to avoid that mob of tramps
October 15, 2025 at 3:42 PM
2pm on a Sunday? Canny. Mare for me mind won't be able to avoid that mob of tramps
Reposted by Cpat
Apropos of nothing, here's a thread of some Charlie Kirk highlights
September 11, 2025 at 1:15 AM
Apropos of nothing, here's a thread of some Charlie Kirk highlights
I went to races and my outfit was very similar to Lner uniform, some bloke asked is a question on platform whilst I was holding a bag of cans, I replied "I don't know do a"
I once went to the local DIY store unintended dressed in a very similar outfit to the staff. Some random guy asked me about a specific cleaning task so I took him to the correct isle, asked him some questions and recommended various products. I'm tempted to do it again on purpose
June 14, 2025 at 7:43 AM
I went to races and my outfit was very similar to Lner uniform, some bloke asked is a question on platform whilst I was holding a bag of cans, I replied "I don't know do a"
Allen had so many opportunities to run but didn't.
January 12, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Allen had so many opportunities to run but didn't.
Took the bairn for a nap at 1230, woke up briefly to tell the ball and chain to turn tv down then back to sleep. Woke up at 1530. Superb nap.
January 12, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Took the bairn for a nap at 1230, woke up briefly to tell the ball and chain to turn tv down then back to sleep. Woke up at 1530. Superb nap.
That other app is truly done
January 4, 2025 at 10:47 PM
That other app is truly done
Retired from drinking me.
December 27, 2024 at 3:28 PM
Retired from drinking me.
If I was a manager of a factory and said factory was closed on a Friday I'd schedule production stopping outside contractor maintenence on a Friday and not a Monday leading into Tuesday. Incredible.
November 26, 2024 at 10:42 AM
If I was a manager of a factory and said factory was closed on a Friday I'd schedule production stopping outside contractor maintenence on a Friday and not a Monday leading into Tuesday. Incredible.
Absolutely can't cope with people saying it's one of them games. We seem to have one of them games often. Howe is scared to drop players and has no idea what to do with Tonali.
November 26, 2024 at 8:39 AM
Absolutely can't cope with people saying it's one of them games. We seem to have one of them games often. Howe is scared to drop players and has no idea what to do with Tonali.
Howe pretty much saying we weren't prepared after International break, how many have we had undr him? Why weren't we? Bruno played 84 minutes despite all travelling surely Howe knew about this prior to break.
November 26, 2024 at 6:28 AM
Howe pretty much saying we weren't prepared after International break, how many have we had undr him? Why weren't we? Bruno played 84 minutes despite all travelling surely Howe knew about this prior to break.
Reposted by Cpat
HOWAY THE LADS! ✊
November 25, 2024 at 6:47 PM
HOWAY THE LADS! ✊
If you're going into Greggs and getting the full office order and don't do it on the app before hand, you probably believe that a online petition will be successful in getting a General election.
November 25, 2024 at 12:57 PM
If you're going into Greggs and getting the full office order and don't do it on the app before hand, you probably believe that a online petition will be successful in getting a General election.
Reposted by Cpat
“It’s hell Paulie, they play Galway Girl every day and Ed Sheeran just pops up out of nowhere interrupting people over and over again.”
November 24, 2024 at 7:04 PM
“It’s hell Paulie, they play Galway Girl every day and Ed Sheeran just pops up out of nowhere interrupting people over and over again.”
Reposted by Cpat
One of the best song openings of all time. No mercy.
November 24, 2024 at 7:38 PM
One of the best song openings of all time. No mercy.
"Worst in the class is you Chad"
Maths teacher handing out test results. I gave him a hard time so he humiliated me with something probably only I remember.
Maths teacher handing out test results. I gave him a hard time so he humiliated me with something probably only I remember.
Introduce yourself with your worst feedback from school:
“Lazy, disinterested and content to do only the minimum”
From my PE teacher. I think she meant “uninterested” but other than that it’s all still true.
“Lazy, disinterested and content to do only the minimum”
From my PE teacher. I think she meant “uninterested” but other than that it’s all still true.
November 21, 2024 at 10:15 AM
"Worst in the class is you Chad"
Maths teacher handing out test results. I gave him a hard time so he humiliated me with something probably only I remember.
Maths teacher handing out test results. I gave him a hard time so he humiliated me with something probably only I remember.
Reposted by Cpat
GK Barry implies the existence of LWB Barry and CDM Barry
November 18, 2024 at 12:47 PM
GK Barry implies the existence of LWB Barry and CDM Barry
They let us on plane to Ibiza and we were all steaming got even worse during flight too.
Cabin crew here: the reason we greet each passenger individually is not to encourage tipping. We're looking for the passengers who'll cause trouble or need assistance. Please don't look and smell like you rolled on the floor in a pub. We'll stop you from boarding.
November 18, 2024 at 6:45 PM
They let us on plane to Ibiza and we were all steaming got even worse during flight too.
Tell you what, just had a look at charts and it's all dung. Need some radio x bangers in there. Gaslight by Travis and Sorry I'm late, I didn't want to come by wombats piss all over charts music.
November 18, 2024 at 6:17 PM
Tell you what, just had a look at charts and it's all dung. Need some radio x bangers in there. Gaslight by Travis and Sorry I'm late, I didn't want to come by wombats piss all over charts music.
Not blocked by Burnsie yet
November 18, 2024 at 5:26 PM
Not blocked by Burnsie yet
Reposted by Cpat
Fancy. Woke. Fillings.
November 18, 2024 at 11:49 AM
Fancy. Woke. Fillings.