Amber Valentine
@amberrecommends.bsky.social
I care about stuff and people (and apparently, that's weird or "revolutionary")
Oh. Movies. I talk a lot about movies.
Oh. Movies. I talk a lot about movies.
This may sound cynical but whatever. Most of you won't stand up to your uncle/grandpa who has problematic views not because you're afraid but because the hate and the bigotry is so normalized and goes without saying that it never even gets to be a dinner table conversation.
December 24, 2025 at 10:28 AM
This may sound cynical but whatever. Most of you won't stand up to your uncle/grandpa who has problematic views not because you're afraid but because the hate and the bigotry is so normalized and goes without saying that it never even gets to be a dinner table conversation.
You know that episode of Regular Show where Starla tells Muscle Man that they spend too much time together and need to be apart but by the end of the episode, they are yearning for each other so much that when they meet again, they cause a heart shaped explosion? That's who I'm saving myself for.
December 23, 2025 at 6:09 AM
You know that episode of Regular Show where Starla tells Muscle Man that they spend too much time together and need to be apart but by the end of the episode, they are yearning for each other so much that when they meet again, they cause a heart shaped explosion? That's who I'm saving myself for.
Can Wolverine heal from a heart attack?
December 23, 2025 at 4:37 AM
Can Wolverine heal from a heart attack?
Instagram explore, when I'm at my job: "Hey look. Here's a butt and some titties. We also have this other collection of just titties. Did I mention that we have butts too?"
Instagram explore, now that I'm on holiday: "You said you like movies? Here some movie things you already know of, asshole"
Instagram explore, now that I'm on holiday: "You said you like movies? Here some movie things you already know of, asshole"
December 17, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Instagram explore, when I'm at my job: "Hey look. Here's a butt and some titties. We also have this other collection of just titties. Did I mention that we have butts too?"
Instagram explore, now that I'm on holiday: "You said you like movies? Here some movie things you already know of, asshole"
Instagram explore, now that I'm on holiday: "You said you like movies? Here some movie things you already know of, asshole"
One thing I'm enforcing in my life come 2026 until beyond is refusing to doubt the magic/power I clearly possess. If my life means anything and the amount of times I've been (mis)treated, it's pretty clear that there's something people see in me (a threat to them) that I don't and that has to stop.
December 9, 2025 at 9:50 AM
One thing I'm enforcing in my life come 2026 until beyond is refusing to doubt the magic/power I clearly possess. If my life means anything and the amount of times I've been (mis)treated, it's pretty clear that there's something people see in me (a threat to them) that I don't and that has to stop.
Reposted by Amber Valentine
I firmly believe that talking normally to strangers on the internet preserves *my* mental health. If I was on here yelling at people every day my brain would be mashed potatoes by now
December 9, 2025 at 5:42 AM
I firmly believe that talking normally to strangers on the internet preserves *my* mental health. If I was on here yelling at people every day my brain would be mashed potatoes by now
"Best Podcast" category is just some performative bullshit. How do you decide what the best podcast is? Who has the podcast world in such a chokehold that the whole world is at their mercy? Are these podcasts about movies? People will argue that the Globes matter but shit like this is why they don't
December 9, 2025 at 7:24 AM
"Best Podcast" category is just some performative bullshit. How do you decide what the best podcast is? Who has the podcast world in such a chokehold that the whole world is at their mercy? Are these podcasts about movies? People will argue that the Globes matter but shit like this is why they don't
Reposted by Amber Valentine
If you’re seeking revenge you should dig two graves. Just in case an innocent bystander sees you digging the first grave.
December 8, 2025 at 12:50 PM
If you’re seeking revenge you should dig two graves. Just in case an innocent bystander sees you digging the first grave.
Reposted by Amber Valentine
A gentle reminder: you can absolutely get punched in your shit (or worse) for words typed on the internet.
December 7, 2025 at 11:59 PM
A gentle reminder: you can absolutely get punched in your shit (or worse) for words typed on the internet.
Dear customer.
We noticed that you've been charged extra erroneously. Our team is investigating the matter.
Dear customer.
Unfortunately, the debit order failed due to the additional charge
Dear Customer.
Due to the failed debit order, we will be charging you a 50% late payment fee
FUCK YOU!!
We noticed that you've been charged extra erroneously. Our team is investigating the matter.
Dear customer.
Unfortunately, the debit order failed due to the additional charge
Dear Customer.
Due to the failed debit order, we will be charging you a 50% late payment fee
FUCK YOU!!
December 5, 2025 at 8:43 AM
Dear customer.
We noticed that you've been charged extra erroneously. Our team is investigating the matter.
Dear customer.
Unfortunately, the debit order failed due to the additional charge
Dear Customer.
Due to the failed debit order, we will be charging you a 50% late payment fee
FUCK YOU!!
We noticed that you've been charged extra erroneously. Our team is investigating the matter.
Dear customer.
Unfortunately, the debit order failed due to the additional charge
Dear Customer.
Due to the failed debit order, we will be charging you a 50% late payment fee
FUCK YOU!!
Reposted by Amber Valentine
YouTube Wrapped
You spent 2,186 minutes watching:
Donald Duck Eating Corn On The Cob (ASMR)
We believe your reason for watching this was:
Not Sexual
You spent 2,186 minutes watching:
Donald Duck Eating Corn On The Cob (ASMR)
We believe your reason for watching this was:
Not Sexual
December 4, 2025 at 3:33 AM
YouTube Wrapped
You spent 2,186 minutes watching:
Donald Duck Eating Corn On The Cob (ASMR)
We believe your reason for watching this was:
Not Sexual
You spent 2,186 minutes watching:
Donald Duck Eating Corn On The Cob (ASMR)
We believe your reason for watching this was:
Not Sexual
At the risk of sounding dismissive of clinical/chronic depression, now that we mostly recognize that the cause of most depression is the way the very capitalist world is set up, don't you think it's time we rethink shock therapy as a treatment?
December 4, 2025 at 10:58 AM
At the risk of sounding dismissive of clinical/chronic depression, now that we mostly recognize that the cause of most depression is the way the very capitalist world is set up, don't you think it's time we rethink shock therapy as a treatment?
I swear. White people say the Hard R when they call you "brother". If you're mad at this take, go dig up Hulk Hogan's grave.
December 3, 2025 at 1:00 PM
I swear. White people say the Hard R when they call you "brother". If you're mad at this take, go dig up Hulk Hogan's grave.
I feel like the "my conservative parents" thing that happens every holiday needs to stop at some time because the next generation is friends of our kids and if they have conservative parents, they'll be talking about us.
December 2, 2025 at 9:12 AM
I feel like the "my conservative parents" thing that happens every holiday needs to stop at some time because the next generation is friends of our kids and if they have conservative parents, they'll be talking about us.
Reposted by Amber Valentine
‘You boy! How do I unsubscribe from all these Black Friday emails?’
December 1, 2025 at 7:42 AM
‘You boy! How do I unsubscribe from all these Black Friday emails?’
Reposted by Amber Valentine
most people think the proper way to watch skinamarink is to simply watch it.
no.
the proper way to watch skinamarink is with me next to you in your peripheral vision, intently staring at you to make sure you're paying attention, and then afterwards you listen to me explain why it was good.
no.
the proper way to watch skinamarink is with me next to you in your peripheral vision, intently staring at you to make sure you're paying attention, and then afterwards you listen to me explain why it was good.
November 30, 2025 at 11:49 PM
most people think the proper way to watch skinamarink is to simply watch it.
no.
the proper way to watch skinamarink is with me next to you in your peripheral vision, intently staring at you to make sure you're paying attention, and then afterwards you listen to me explain why it was good.
no.
the proper way to watch skinamarink is with me next to you in your peripheral vision, intently staring at you to make sure you're paying attention, and then afterwards you listen to me explain why it was good.
Reposted by Amber Valentine
The Munsters poses the chilling question, what if your parents were a vampire and a Frankenstein? The Addams Family poses the chilling question, what if your parents were openly sexual?
December 1, 2025 at 2:56 AM
The Munsters poses the chilling question, what if your parents were a vampire and a Frankenstein? The Addams Family poses the chilling question, what if your parents were openly sexual?
I always get baffled when I hear someone say that they get death threats on the internet. I'm not saying their not a real thing as much as I'm saying that some people are really unhinged. Like how bad is your life that you have all the time and effort to threaten death to someone you don't know?
November 28, 2025 at 5:10 AM
I always get baffled when I hear someone say that they get death threats on the internet. I'm not saying their not a real thing as much as I'm saying that some people are really unhinged. Like how bad is your life that you have all the time and effort to threaten death to someone you don't know?
My one big flex in my current life is that it looks like I've been able to successfully remove everyone who thinks community is tantamount to over familiarity from my life. I often see how my mutuals tend to be addressed on the socials, especially responses to them doing their own thing, and yeah no
November 27, 2025 at 11:37 AM
My one big flex in my current life is that it looks like I've been able to successfully remove everyone who thinks community is tantamount to over familiarity from my life. I often see how my mutuals tend to be addressed on the socials, especially responses to them doing their own thing, and yeah no
I know it's something we collectively believe to be an embarrassing thing but I'm genuinely jealous of my friends and people in general who have a crush on someone. Not people in a relationship (those scare me). Also, I am constantly around people I find attractive but as for being smitten? Nothing
November 26, 2025 at 11:47 AM
I know it's something we collectively believe to be an embarrassing thing but I'm genuinely jealous of my friends and people in general who have a crush on someone. Not people in a relationship (those scare me). Also, I am constantly around people I find attractive but as for being smitten? Nothing
I hate those days where I lock in and I'm super productive at my job because it really proves that I can actually do whatever I put my mind to it... which then makes me wonder why I half-arse everything else. Is it money? I think it's money
November 25, 2025 at 9:01 AM
I hate those days where I lock in and I'm super productive at my job because it really proves that I can actually do whatever I put my mind to it... which then makes me wonder why I half-arse everything else. Is it money? I think it's money
Reposted by Amber Valentine
The Thing (1982) is a Thanksgiving movie.
Thought of it while prepping a Friendsgiving turkey today.
Thought of it while prepping a Friendsgiving turkey today.
November 22, 2025 at 6:33 PM
The Thing (1982) is a Thanksgiving movie.
Thought of it while prepping a Friendsgiving turkey today.
Thought of it while prepping a Friendsgiving turkey today.
Reposted by Amber Valentine
Movie night with the fam… This movies is amazing!
November 23, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Movie night with the fam… This movies is amazing!
Reposted by Amber Valentine
‘Do you think we ever met in a past life?’ You ask, smiling like you enjoy the notion.
I think I’ve loved you in every single one. This feeling feels ancient, rooted into my soul. But what I say is: ‘I don’t know. But I’ll find you in the next one so I can annoy you some more.’
I think I’ve loved you in every single one. This feeling feels ancient, rooted into my soul. But what I say is: ‘I don’t know. But I’ll find you in the next one so I can annoy you some more.’
November 24, 2025 at 4:52 AM
‘Do you think we ever met in a past life?’ You ask, smiling like you enjoy the notion.
I think I’ve loved you in every single one. This feeling feels ancient, rooted into my soul. But what I say is: ‘I don’t know. But I’ll find you in the next one so I can annoy you some more.’
I think I’ve loved you in every single one. This feeling feels ancient, rooted into my soul. But what I say is: ‘I don’t know. But I’ll find you in the next one so I can annoy you some more.’