A Real Octopus
@a-real-octopus.bsky.social
He/him, trans // All Cephalopods Are Beautiful
When people ask me, as they occasionally do, what advice I would give young trans people who are struggling I'm going to start saying "take care of your teeth". It's a way to show yourself you're worth caring for, a way to remind yourself that you have a future, and you'll be glad you did.
I definitely had the whole foreshortened sense of future thing for most of my life and now I'm forty one and I really never expected to get here. I wish I'd taken better care of my teeth.
November 26, 2025 at 2:23 PM
When people ask me, as they occasionally do, what advice I would give young trans people who are struggling I'm going to start saying "take care of your teeth". It's a way to show yourself you're worth caring for, a way to remind yourself that you have a future, and you'll be glad you did.
Why is it so hard to find GOOD CROCHET CARDIGAN/SWEATER BOOKS WITH PATTERNS FOR MEN AND CHILDREN!!! It's like 85% knitting books and the crochet books are mostly introduction/tutorial books or like sweaters and accessories for women. I am exaggerating and I have a Ravelry account but I want books.
November 26, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Why is it so hard to find GOOD CROCHET CARDIGAN/SWEATER BOOKS WITH PATTERNS FOR MEN AND CHILDREN!!! It's like 85% knitting books and the crochet books are mostly introduction/tutorial books or like sweaters and accessories for women. I am exaggerating and I have a Ravelry account but I want books.
I went to several explicitly queer and trans friendly haircut places when I first came out. I got misgendered at all of them, the vibes were weird, and they were very expensive. Now I just go to Supercuts, it's cheaper and my expectations aren't high.
i find it frustrating how in the dearth of cis people being normal about trans people, there's a whole cottage industry of "gender-affirming" or "trans-affirming" versions of pre-existing services where they upcharge on the promise that they definitely won't be weird (they will be definitely weird).
November 25, 2025 at 8:47 PM
I went to several explicitly queer and trans friendly haircut places when I first came out. I got misgendered at all of them, the vibes were weird, and they were very expensive. Now I just go to Supercuts, it's cheaper and my expectations aren't high.
Reposted by A Real Octopus
Reposted by A Real Octopus
It’s fine to see something and think “Carville may have a point”, but you gotta push through it because he never does.
November 24, 2025 at 8:43 PM
It’s fine to see something and think “Carville may have a point”, but you gotta push through it because he never does.
Reposted by A Real Octopus
Having a cis person tell you that you don't need to transition to be trans feels like a rich person saying that you don't need material possessions to be happy.
November 24, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Having a cis person tell you that you don't need to transition to be trans feels like a rich person saying that you don't need material possessions to be happy.
I'm a sucker for this
November 24, 2025 at 3:12 PM
I'm a sucker for this
Something I like to do is when someone uses the wrong pronouns for a trans woman say "[NAME] is a woman" and when someone uses the wrong pronouns for a cis woman (usually based on her name) say "[NAME] uses she/her pronouns".
November 24, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Something I like to do is when someone uses the wrong pronouns for a trans woman say "[NAME] is a woman" and when someone uses the wrong pronouns for a cis woman (usually based on her name) say "[NAME] uses she/her pronouns".
Reposted by A Real Octopus
“I asked ChatGPT” “I asked Claude” I asked this horseshoe crab and he said your ass wouldn’t have lasted two seconds in the Triassic
November 23, 2025 at 9:50 PM
“I asked ChatGPT” “I asked Claude” I asked this horseshoe crab and he said your ass wouldn’t have lasted two seconds in the Triassic
Reposted by A Real Octopus
goddamn it, no, this is not a "christmas manicure", i just thought it would be fun to have green on my starboard side and red on my port side like an airplane or a boat
November 24, 2025 at 12:55 PM
goddamn it, no, this is not a "christmas manicure", i just thought it would be fun to have green on my starboard side and red on my port side like an airplane or a boat
Obviously the most important part of this is the eugenics boosting which is horrific but something I can't get over is how incredibly DULL Elon Musk is; he's constantly approvingly quoting-posting stuff that is intensely awful but in the most boring way. He never has anything substantive to add.
November 24, 2025 at 1:14 PM
Obviously the most important part of this is the eugenics boosting which is horrific but something I can't get over is how incredibly DULL Elon Musk is; he's constantly approvingly quoting-posting stuff that is intensely awful but in the most boring way. He never has anything substantive to add.
I think this take is incredibly weird -- like that's exactly what happened? Obama got elected and Republicans crashed out and decided that America as it exists was unacceptable to them because their love for country or whatever is conditional so they retreated to an America of the mind.
November 24, 2025 at 1:07 PM
I think this take is incredibly weird -- like that's exactly what happened? Obama got elected and Republicans crashed out and decided that America as it exists was unacceptable to them because their love for country or whatever is conditional so they retreated to an America of the mind.
I know I say this a lot but people are often willing to provide vouches for those they don't actually know well! I would also suggest that if people discuss spicy activities in spaces that are not well-vetted then their judgement is questionable and you should be careful organizing with them.
November 21, 2025 at 4:21 PM
I know I say this a lot but people are often willing to provide vouches for those they don't actually know well! I would also suggest that if people discuss spicy activities in spaces that are not well-vetted then their judgement is questionable and you should be careful organizing with them.
This is correct! Once someone in my family got a Christmas cracker with the question "how many tentacles does a squid have?" and I said, with some vehemence, "it's going to say ten but technically it's eight arms and two tentacles!" and my cousin looked at the answer and was like "it says ten"
also, half remembered from QI, they have arms not tentacles because tentacles only have suckers at the end whereas on an octopus they're all the way along the limb
November 21, 2025 at 2:54 PM
This is correct! Once someone in my family got a Christmas cracker with the question "how many tentacles does a squid have?" and I said, with some vehemence, "it's going to say ten but technically it's eight arms and two tentacles!" and my cousin looked at the answer and was like "it says ten"
Reposted by A Real Octopus
You wouldn't last an hour in the Barnes and Noble where they raised me.
"The Barnes and Noble in York—where Fetterman was born and raised—had sold zero copies. The Barnes and Noble in Philadelphia had sold two copies. An independent store in Pittsburgh and an independent store in Philadelphia each told me they weren’t stocking Unfettered" defector.com/john-fetterm...
John Fetterman's Memoir Is As Low-Effort As His Senate Tenure | Defector
John Fetterman’s just-released memoir, Unfettered, argues that he’s turned a corner and has everything under control. Fetterman was a “stubborn asshole” (his words), he was clinically depressed, he wa...
defector.com
November 21, 2025 at 2:07 PM
You wouldn't last an hour in the Barnes and Noble where they raised me.
I hate this so fucking much. Why do you care what "confounds partisan molds"? You're Democrats, you should be partisan! Anointing these people, while acknowledging that "national security isn't a top policy concern for voters", as "the next generation of party leadership" is ridiculous.
they've always been like this and will always be like this and they pretend they are doing something new every time and it makes me want to die www.kenklippenstein.com/p/national-s...
November 21, 2025 at 1:47 PM
I hate this so fucking much. Why do you care what "confounds partisan molds"? You're Democrats, you should be partisan! Anointing these people, while acknowledging that "national security isn't a top policy concern for voters", as "the next generation of party leadership" is ridiculous.
Thinking for some reason about how when I was a kid I was briefly very into making balloon animals
Yessss same I was so pleased with myself even though every animal I made was just a dog with characteristics (mouse? Dog made of small segments. Rabbit? Dog with big ears. Giraffe? Buddy you better believe that's a dog with a long neck)
November 21, 2025 at 1:32 PM
Thinking for some reason about how when I was a kid I was briefly very into making balloon animals
Reposted by A Real Octopus
flying the transgender flag upside down to let the rest of the gays know we’re in distress
October 13, 2025 at 2:45 AM
flying the transgender flag upside down to let the rest of the gays know we’re in distress
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Getting a job. Go and do that. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I have a job. That's part of what's making me so fucking depressed.'
November 20, 2025 at 7:17 PM
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Getting a job. Go and do that. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I have a job. That's part of what's making me so fucking depressed.'
"Not the hill I would die on" gee must be nice to have a choice about dying on the "hill" of trans rights
If he ends up being the Democrat on the presidential ticket in 2028, you would rather vote republican or not vote at all because of this issue?? That’s the million dollar question. Not the hill I would die on and def not worth losing an election over!
November 20, 2025 at 3:10 PM
"Not the hill I would die on" gee must be nice to have a choice about dying on the "hill" of trans rights
For real though some of my feelings are "sadness" and "gratitude I don't have to be 'remembered' just yet". It has been touch and go at some moments and my heart aches for all my trans siblings who are struggling or have struggled and to everyone trans who has suffered.
It's Trans Day of Remembrance and I have feelings and frankly I don't care for it
November 20, 2025 at 2:57 PM
For real though some of my feelings are "sadness" and "gratitude I don't have to be 'remembered' just yet". It has been touch and go at some moments and my heart aches for all my trans siblings who are struggling or have struggled and to everyone trans who has suffered.
It's Trans Day of Remembrance and I have feelings and frankly I don't care for it
November 20, 2025 at 2:50 PM
It's Trans Day of Remembrance and I have feelings and frankly I don't care for it
Happy International Men's Day mostly to trans men
November 19, 2025 at 11:19 AM
Happy International Men's Day mostly to trans men
Engaging in the farce that is logging into something on the device I use for 2FA
November 18, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Engaging in the farce that is logging into something on the device I use for 2FA
"The pressure to retaliate" is a funny way to say "the push for accountability"
Trump will not just be four years of bad management. The culture of these organizations will be fucked for a long time. The pressure to retaliate and clean house will be strong, and no-one wants to work in a war zone.
November 18, 2025 at 2:24 PM
"The pressure to retaliate" is a funny way to say "the push for accountability"